1. 10

    He had the kind of face only a mother could love. If that mother was blind in one eye, and had that sort of milky film over the other one, ya..ya know, ya know what I mean? But still he was my identical twin.

    17
  2. 9

    Our top story tonight: Famous TV dolphin flipper was arrested today on prostitution ring charges. He allegedly was seen transporting two 16 year olds across state line for immoral porpoises.

    18
  3. 8

    Many people think it's in bad taste to advertise for an insane asylum... but come on down. We're going crazy.

    18
  4. 7

    Did you know that..........'embargo' spelled backwards is 'o grab me

    22
  5. 6

    This just in: Beverly Hills 90210, Cleveland Browns 3.

    22
  6. 5

    Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people, one person will always disagree with the other nine!

    30
  7. 4

    Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer, dead at 53. Over Barcelona today, the famed reindeer was hit by a flock of seagulls and a 747. Eyewitnesses report, that the reindeer in Spain was hit mainly by the plane.

    33
  8. 3

    We all have a dinosaur deep within us just trying to get out.

    79
  9. 2

    There are so many things I'd like to change in the industry. Everything from the reliance of style over substance to their reluctance to hire me for big budget blockbusters, but the thing I would love most would be if they understood people don't have to be Hollywood beautiful to be sexy or interesting.

    81
  10. 1

    I'm handsome, no ands, buts or ifs.

    162
  11. Last Update: 21 January 2022

View the rest 58 Colin Mochrie sayings