110+ Gabriel Iglesias Quotes (Funny, Energetic And Relatable)

Gabriel Iglesias is an American comedian, actor, writer, producer, and voice actor. He is known for his shows I'm Not Fat...I'm Fluffy and Hot & Fluffy, and is also known for his roles in the films Magic Mike, Magic Mike XXL, and The Nut Job 2: Nutty by Nature. He is also known for his voice roles in the films Coco and Show Dogs.

Top 10 Gabriel Iglesias Quotes

1. There's 5 levels of fatness! Fluffy is one of the levels. There's big, healthy, husky, fluffy and damn.
2. I drink diet coke so I can eat regular cake.
3. When you go to Hawaii, it's all about "Aloha." It means hello, goodbye and I love you.
4. I had to travel half way across the world to be called an American.
5. Anything is possible as long as you're focused, determined and you really want to do it.
6. I don't even have a clue as to where to find a pregnancy test. I'm looking at all the aisles... they don't have one that says 'oops.
7. At the time, it was a really funny joke [Fluffy] and I went back and forth with going against the joke or embrace it. I decided to embrace it and now we're talking about it, so it was a good call.
8. I'm not on a diet. And it's funny cause people go 'Well, then why do you drink diet soda?' So I can eat regular cake.
9. I'll walk up to a woman, I'll say the first thing that comes to mind: 'Hey, you hungry?'
10. Understand that you don't know it all. You don't know anything yet. What you've been taught is great, but always go with common sense. And don't marry your first love.

Gabriel Iglesias Short Quotes

• Early on when I started talking about my weight, it was self-deprecating; everything was a joke.
• If you put your personal stories out there people always connect.
• Surround yourself with supportive people. All the negative people, man you have to push them aside.
• Hanging out with comics, all they did was make fun of me.
• When I go to dance clubs, I always dance with big girls, so we finish at the same time.
• For me, the hardest thing was dropping the whole Latino comic title.
• You gotta hang out with people who have big dreams and believe in that dream.
• People can relate to someone who isn't perfect.
• I know enough football to know that's funny!
• I don't wanna just be remembered for the funniest guy in my neighborhood.

Gabriel Iglesias Famous Quotes And Sayings

When you have nothing but big friends, you never get into arguments - except one. And that is, who is the biggest? I'll let you know right now, there's only one way to settle this. We all get in a bus and we go to Disney and we get on a roller coaster - whoever gets the least amount of clicks on the safety bar is the big one. — Gabriel Iglesias

I just know you can not be on top forever. There's always going to be the next guy, and if I'm going to go down, I'd like to know I helped the next guy take my spot. You can't prevent the inevitable, but you can join the ship. — Gabriel Iglesias

I started riding the whole 'fluffy' train, and it's a cute word and socially a lot more acceptable than someone saying is fat or obese. If you call a girl 'fat,' yo, she'll raise hell, but if you say, 'Aw girl, look at you, you're fluffy,' there's almost a sexy appeal to it. — Gabriel Iglesias

In the beginning, when I was doing my shows, I was incorporating a lot of Spanish, just trying to be a Latino comic instead of just a comic. Now I try to make the show as broad as possible... I don't want to alienate people. I want to make it so everybody can follow along and everybody can relate. — Gabriel Iglesias

Now I understand why people do drugs, why people drink, and why people go crazy. As the success level goes up and up and up, the further detached I get from everybody else. Luckily, with my girlfriend, everything is gravy because I brought her into it. I brought her in and she's very hands on with my career. — Gabriel Iglesias

Home in bed listening to the rain getting ready to order a pizza. Sounds like a song til the last part. — Gabriel Iglesias

Every night, it's a bakery on the bus. It's a curse, because I talk about how much I love cake, people bring me cake. And now I just found out I'm diabetic, so I'm like, are you kidding me?! — Gabriel Iglesias

I went up on stage, and said, "Why did the chicken cross the road? To check out the chicks." I was a genius at 10. Try telling that at 21, and you look hacky and stupid. That was the only joke I've ever told. Everything since has been character voices, doing impressions or just telling stories. — Gabriel Iglesias

Best advice, bro: Think big. Don't think small. If you think small, then you're going to stay small. Think (about) the broad scope. — Gabriel Iglesias

I'm never home. I miss birthdays. I miss holidays. I miss anniversaries. I miss special moments. I'm not always there for important times, because I'm out on the road trying to make people laugh. I give up my privacy. I give up the ability to walk somewhere and relax. — Gabriel Iglesias

Wearing a Hawaiian shirt, you don't ever come across as offensive. Nobody sees you as a threat. You see someone in a Hawaiian shirt, and you are like 'this guy is ready to party.' — Gabriel Iglesias

My girlfriend knows that if I'm acting weird at home to go to one of my shows to see what's on my mind. — Gabriel Iglesias

And I don't want you thinking that my girlfriend is a bad person. She is an amazing woman, the fact that I only have seven stories about her in eight years, says a lot. You know, don't get me wrong, five of them happened this year, but that's still way below the bar, you know what I am saying. — Gabriel Iglesias

I just like The Little Mermaid cartoon. Say what you want. I have a fish tank, it's a long story. I have a fascination with the ocean, and you put a hot chick in there, it just adds more to it! I liked The Little Mermaid. It's a cool movie. It's one of those I watch over and over again. — Gabriel Iglesias

I was a big fan of Rodney Dangerfield. He had this HBO Young Comedians Special and he'd always bring up new talent, and I loved that! — Gabriel Iglesias

For about three years I was performing at one bar in East Los Angeles that was like a mean dive bar. You're in there performing for drunks or bikers, not the most flattering people. I think it helped build my confidence, because you have to get their attention, then make them laugh. — Gabriel Iglesias

I eat a lot of junk food, because that's what's usually available at 1:00am when I'm all done working. — Gabriel Iglesias

A lot of the comedians nowadays just do comedy as a stepping stone. Take for example Dane Cook. The guy is huge. The main reason he got into it is to do what he is doing now: film and television work. — Gabriel Iglesias

The best advice bro: is think big, as big as you can possibly think, and shoot for that. The bigger you aim for, the bigger you're going to be. Set the standards for yourself as high as you possibly can and also surround yourself with people who have the same visions you have. — Gabriel Iglesias

I just recently crossed over into Europe. They're showing my special Hot and Fluffy in Europe and selling the DVD there too. And they're doing the same thing in Australia and Canada. And I think the biggest part was I did the special in a predominantly Latino area, but I kept the show mainstream and across the board. — Gabriel Iglesias

My favorite people to have fun with are police officers 'cause they're so serious, you know. — Gabriel Iglesias

I see a lot of nice hotels, but I never really get to enjoy the cities, because I have to be on a plane the next day. — Gabriel Iglesias

Social media has definitely changed the game for me. I am able to connect to my fans on twitter and interact with them, daily. YouTube has been a game changer as well - people around the world have been exposed to my comedy through my YouTube channel. — Gabriel Iglesias

As a comedian, especially one that works as much as I do, there is a lot of sacrifice. People don't see that I'm away from my family 46 weeks out of the year. I miss all the birthdays and anniversaries and holidays. — Gabriel Iglesias

I started talking about things that everybody could relate to. And that's not to say I deserted my roots, I just found a way to talk about things in a broad way. — Gabriel Iglesias

I wanted to be a comedian, and this is what I'm doing. If I can keep this going, I'm happy. — Gabriel Iglesias

I got off the plane - I was walking and cooking at the same time. — Gabriel Iglesias

The only way I will do a sitcom is if it's hurled at me, and I don't have to work for it. — Gabriel Iglesias

I have very nice cars. I never get to drive them, because I'm never home. — Gabriel Iglesias

I'm not fat. It's just my awesomeness swelling up inside of me. — Gabriel Iglesias

I've got foundation jokes, the ones that got me where I am, so everything I do just builds on top of that. — Gabriel Iglesias

I still come out to music that's in Spanish. There's no denying who I am, but I've just made it to where my performance is so anybody can understand it - whether you're 10 years old or 80 years old. — Gabriel Iglesias

I bought a Hummer before I bought a house, and then I bought a house. Every year, everything doubled. The work was doubling. The money was doubling. The popularity was doubling. — Gabriel Iglesias

When you hear "Seinfield," no one says, "the Jewish comic." You talk about Cedric the Entertainer, you don't say, "African American comedian Cedric the Entertainer." Even Margaret Cho - who's like one of three Korean performers out there - no one refers to her like that. They say, "It's Margaret Cho." — Gabriel Iglesias

Honestly, you got to take care of the people that take care of you. I know that sounds like cliche, or borderline phony, but that's the case. The reason I've had the fans that I have is because I've been consistent over the years and kept coming back and doing the same runs. I'm never going to stop doing the cities I've gone through. I'm only going to add. — Gabriel Iglesias

We can choose our family. We can't choose our relatives. — Gabriel Iglesias

You pigeon hole yourself by the title you give yourself. — Gabriel Iglesias

People understand when I talk about my son not listening, or issues at home or his real dad coming back into the picture, or even stories about family members not seeing eye to eye with what you're doing. — Gabriel Iglesias

That was the challenge. How can you tell the story here and make sure it goes the same way on the other side of the world? — Gabriel Iglesias

Why would anybody connect to someone who has everything going for them? It's the person who has faults that people want to connect to. So people identify with certain insecurities on stage and just by me talking about my diabetes people come up to me after the show and tell me "Gabe, my blood sugar is out of control and I feel you". That's the first thing they say, they say "I feel you!". — Gabriel Iglesias

There's nowhere in the country that I can't go or won't go. I think it's because I've worked on making my show where everyone can understand it, everyone can relate to it, and no one feels like I'm alienating them. — Gabriel Iglesias

I want to be known as a funny comic not just a funny Latino comic. I want to be able to go everywhere and anywhere. — Gabriel Iglesias

Well, like I said, there's no reason everyone can't have a piece of the pie, even if there's a gordo there eating most of it. — Gabriel Iglesias

[Making people laugh] was a secret dream I kept and I didn't tell anybody about it until I was about 18. — Gabriel Iglesias

The Ford Flex is a really, really cool car. You get inside and you have so much headroom and it's really comfortable to drive and it's real techy inside. You look at the screen and it's blue and you've got all kinds of controls. Everything is digital. — Gabriel Iglesias

If you aim to be big, you will be big. And that's not a pun about my size. — Gabriel Iglesias

I remember seeing Eddie Murphy RAW and seeing people laughing and having a good time and that was the same response I was getting so I thought I was on to something. — Gabriel Iglesias

By the end of the semester [in the high school] I was the only one up in front of the class everyday. Actually I could have passed the class four times over because every time you got in front of the class you got extra credit.That was the only class I got an A in and it was the funniest report card because it read Speech - A but everything else was just D, D, D, D. — Gabriel Iglesias

Drinking can bring out a dude that has some issues. — Gabriel Iglesias

There are certain bits in my act that will never change. — Gabriel Iglesias

I try not to get political, I don't want to get religious, I don't want to get controversial, I just want to have a show that relates to everybody. — Gabriel Iglesias

I did Popeye and Ronald Reagan and everybody was saying things like "yeah he's a cute little kid" but I started, little by little, telling stories about people I'd met and expanded my voices. — Gabriel Iglesias

As far as "uncut" I think we all know that you guys cut up the special. Originally it was going to be 2 hours plus and it got chopped down so I said "we can't use those words because it's not going to represent me right". — Gabriel Iglesias

I learned early on, stay away from politics, stay away from religion and don't talk about sports. Those three right there will get you in trouble. — Gabriel Iglesias

Jeff Foxworthy had that whole "You might be a redneck" thing; Larry the Cable Guy had "Git-R-Done." Some comics have that hook. Dane Cook had that super finger. So I just caught on early on. I ran with "Fluffy." — Gabriel Iglesias

Life is measured by how you lived it, not by the years. — Gabriel Iglesias

People see a big dude and they hear that high pitched voice or "Eglasias with an 'I'" and love it because they can relate and go "I know that person!". — Gabriel Iglesias

I have no talent when it comes to pianos or guitars or any of that, even karaoke. For karaoke, I have to be wasted to get up there and sing. — Gabriel Iglesias

I got a brother who calls me Hollywood. Sisters kind of keep their distance. Even my mom is kind of like ahhh with me. Yeah dude, it really sucks. And I wish things were different. Unfortunately, they don't understand everything I go through on a day to day basis to be able to maintain what I'm doing. — Gabriel Iglesias

There's been a lot of guys that come out of Texas who have made it really big. So it's not a geographic thing, it's a how hard are you willing to work for it. — Gabriel Iglesias

If i wouldn't have done comedy, I would have been a teacher. I was really good when I took an exploratory teaching class in high school, at getting kids' attention, and delivering lesson plans. Though my principal even told me that this was what I was meant to do. And that being a big-mouth comedian was a waste of time. — Gabriel Iglesias

The girl voice is always going to kill because they don't expect it. — Gabriel Iglesias

When I was a kid I did impressions and funny voices a lot. When I was telling a story I would use the voices to make it more entertaining. — Gabriel Iglesias

I don't want to die tomorrow knowing I could've had a piece of cake tonight. — Gabriel Iglesias

As long as you have a director, that's your feedback. It's the director telling you, "Okay. That was great! Okay. Can we add a little? Can you tweak it like this? Can you make it more high pitched? Can you give it a little growl?" — Gabriel Iglesias

Originally the big argument was that they wanted to call it "raw and uncut" and I told them I had a problem with that. When you say "raw" it implies that my show is dirty and that's not the case. — Gabriel Iglesias

Drama is not my passion. If I do it, it's for a check. It's not what I want to do. Comedy's my thing. Stand up's my thing. Everything that comes from that is frosting on the cake. — Gabriel Iglesias

With all the classes they offer at school, how come they don't have one for common sense? — Gabriel Iglesias

Now people are coming up to meet me at my shows and they're doing my bits! One guy earlier was at 7-11 and he comes up to me and goes "you want a falcon?". — Gabriel Iglesias

I was very dirty; I was a very dirty comic. There was no way I would have gotten on TV with the act I had when I first started. — Gabriel Iglesias

I'm not selling out, denying who I am or where I've come from, not at all. I acknowledge that. — Gabriel Iglesias

That's one thing about my shows. I tell people, I'm not a comedian, I'm just a really funny reporter. I put my life out there and make it entertaining. By putting it out there, it helps me to deal with it, you know, so I don't snap and so I don't go off the handle when I get home. — Gabriel Iglesias

I'm a big fan of Kiss. Gene Simmons, he's all into marketing and branding. You name it, there's some type of product with Kiss' name on it. Studying people like that, you see guys have hooks and there are reasons people are successful. — Gabriel Iglesias

Honestly, I really don't like acting. I don't enjoy it. What I do like is going to a movie theatre and seeing my face on a poster. I like seeing my name on a poster. That is cool. — Gabriel Iglesias

You can't be bad ass in a car that kills gas like I kill tacos. — Gabriel Iglesias

Once I started doing specials I always incorporated "Fluffy" into it. But with Stand-Up Revolution, I left it out because I want it to be different for people. I'm there, yes, but it's something different. — Gabriel Iglesias

With this show [Stand-Up Revolution ], I loved the idea that I would be picking the talent that goes on, not the network. It was me handpicking people who might not have gotten the chance to be on TV. So, I thought it was real cool that I was putting people up there. — Gabriel Iglesias

Sometimes [high school speech team] was funny, other times it was just talking, but it gave me the confidence to speak in front of people after doing that for a whole year. — Gabriel Iglesias

When I first got to St. Louis, I saw the arch and I said, 'I want to go to that McDonalds. — Gabriel Iglesias

I don't have to worry about writing jokes. I just tell stories about things that have happened to me. As long as I'm alive and I'm living and I'm experiencing different things every day, the show will always change. — Gabriel Iglesias

I love Australia. First of all, everyone is so nice. The people are down to Earth, and they like having fun with you. — Gabriel Iglesias

Some people can handle alcohol. You know who you are. Some people can't handle alcohol. The police know who you are. — Gabriel Iglesias

When you're a comedian, the Holy Grail is an hour long HBO special. — Gabriel Iglesias

I see a Latino comic as someone who can only perform for Latino audiences. I cross the board. — Gabriel Iglesias

Stand-up is not just an American thing anymore. It's global. In some places, stand-up comedy is brand new. South Africa has only had a scene for 15 years. — Gabriel Iglesias

Be personal, and original. Try to work clean. Stay away from topical material, as it does not allow you to craft it to make it better for later. And always remember that it is the fans who will make you or break you. — Gabriel Iglesias

I like to tell old jokes on stage after about an hour, or an hour and a half. I'll bring those old ones back because the fans love them. — Gabriel Iglesias

I go on the road all the time, but I'm only performing for two hours a night, and then I'll do a meet-and-greet, and then I'll get a bite to eat, get drunk, pass out, wake up the next day, sleeping the next day, sleeping off the hangover, and then I'm in the next city. — Gabriel Iglesias

If I'm drinking I can either be the nicest guy ever or I'm the guy you should leave alone. — Gabriel Iglesias

Aside from producing I want to direct but I'm also going to get back out on the road. — Gabriel Iglesias

[ The aim to be big] is not a joke about my size. It's just that I'm a dreamer, but I'm following through with it. I believe anyone can do it as long as they focus and have a game plan. — Gabriel Iglesias

Anyone who's seen my specials knows I don't put out the same stuff twice. — Gabriel Iglesias

Life Lessons by Gabriel Iglesias

1. Gabriel Iglesias teaches us that it's important to stay true to yourself and to never give up on your dreams.
2. He also shows us that it's possible to find success by staying positive and believing in yourself.
3. Lastly, he demonstrates that with hard work and dedication, anything is possible.