Leo: "So...giants who can throw mountains. Friendly wolves that will eat us if we show weakness. Evil espresso drinks. Gotcha. Maybe this isn't the best time to bring up my psycho babysitter." Piper: "Is that another joke?
— Rick Riordan
Most Powerful Best Friend Joke quotations
The good Lord in his ultimate wisdom gave us three things to make life bearable: hope, jokes, and dogs, but the greatest of these was dogs.
A dog doesn't care if you're rich or poor, big or small, young or old.
He doesn't care if you're not smart, not popular, not a good joke-teller, not the best athlete, nor the best-looking person. To your dog, you are the greatest, the smartest, the nicest human being who was ever born. You are his friend and protector.
[Revealing character] can't be done by pushing the person into position or arranging his head at a certain angle. It must be accomplished by provoking the victim, amusing him with jokes, lulling him with silence, or asking impertinent questions which his best friend would be afraid to voice.
I am not going to say that people who enter the military are doing anything wrong. As I often jokingly tell my students, "Many of my best of friends are in the military!" But it's true. Perhaps not in the Aristotelian sense of the word "friendship" but on so many other levels that matter, we are truly friends.
I call my backup singers my sister wives.
To me, they are my best friends. We are all super close. It's kind of like the closest relationship you can have without being blood related, to me. It's a joke that they're sister wives - obviously, we're not polygamists.
My best friend is disabled. There's nothing he hates more than being left out of the jokes, to be treated with kid gloves. That's the insult.
A white lady came running up to me after a show.
She goes, What gives you the right to do jokes about black people like that. And I'm like, Listen lady, my best friend is Cuban. And that's close enough.
I remember when I did 'Click' and I'd see Adam Sandler's fan base.
He's the guy that people feel that he's their best friend, so he's walking down the street and people sort of high five him and want to tell him a joke or invite him to come home and have a sandwich with them.
I don't find the same things funny that many other people seem to find funny.
I don't really respond to sex jokes and things like that, and some of my friends look at me and go, "Come on, Nic, that was my best joke. Why aren't you laughing?" I go, "I really don't know why I'm not laughing. I'm sort of out of sync with it." So I'd have to find something that was really about weird human behavior for me to laugh.
