quote by Garry Shandling

I met a new girl at a barbecue, very pretty, a blond I think. I don't know, her hair was on fire, and all she talked about was herself. You know these kind of girls: 'I'm hot. I'm on fire. Me, me, me.' You know. 'Help me, put me out.' Come on, could we talk about me just a little bit?

— Garry Shandling

Irresistibly dumb blonde quotes that are about funny blonde

Angels are totally real. Tinkerbell has a hot ass. Wendigos exist. It's all true. Satan is blonde. True fact.

It takes a smart brunette to play a dumb blonde.

A kiss on the hand may feel very, very good, but a diamond and sapphire bracelet lasts forever.

I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not dumb.

.. and I also know that I'm not blonde.

I haven't deliberately set out to play the blonde bombshell in my movies.

In fact, it's probably been quite the opposite. After the success of The Mask, I wasn't offered all that many blonde bombshell parts, to be honest. I think people believed from the beginning that I could actually walk and talk at the same time.

Ditzy dumb blonde? I can be ditzy. I can be.

Is this chicken what I have or is this fish? I know it's tuna. But it says chicken. By the sea.

Types really don't matter. I have been accused of preferring blondes. But I have known some mighty attractive redheads, brunettes, and yes, women with grey hair. Age, height, weight haven't anything to do with glamour.

When I was a kid I had this funny blonde hair and everyone called me 'Chick' because I looked like Tweety Bird.

I paint German artists whom I admire.

I paint their pictures, their work as painters, and their portraits too. But oddly enough, each of these portraits ends up as a picture of a woman with blonde hair. I myself have never been able to work out why this happens.

It was a blonde. A blonde to make a bishop kick a hole in a stained-glass window.

Say what you want about the deaf.

What good are vitamins? Eat a lobster, eat a pound of caviar - live! If you are in love with a beautiful blonde with an empty face and no brains at all, don't be afraid. Marry her! Live!

Gentlemen prefer blondes... but gentlemen marry brunettes.

When I died my hair red the first time, I felt as if it was what nature intended. I have been accused of being a bit of a spitfire, so in that way, I absolutely live up to the stereotype. The red hair suits my personality. I was a terrible blonde!

The hippies wanted peace and love. We wanted Ferraris, blondes and switchblades.

Tall, sandy blonde, with sort of blue eyes, skinny in places, fat in others. An average gal.

There's nobody in the world like me. I think every decade has an iconic blonde, like Marilyn Monroe or Princess Diana and, right now, I'm that icon.

My Latin roots are very strong. All my life, because I'm blonde and blue-eyed, people who aren't Hispanic can't believe I am. And people who are Hispanic always think I'm not, because I don't look like them. Being Latin is part of who I am and I bring that part to every role.

I've got more junk in the trunk than most 5-foot-1 blonde girls, and I like it.

My natural color is dark blond, but right now I like being a brunette.

I did a movie last summer and they dyed my hair platinum - I hated it.

If I go into a club now, all the blonde girls leave my corner and all the black girls come into my corner. It's as if I'm racist towards white girls!

Olivia Newton-John - Australia's gift to insomniacs. It's nothing but the blonde singing the bland.

He had no idea where the stereotype of dumb giggly blondes came from.

Ever since he'd met Annabeth at the Grand Canyon last winter,when she'd marched toward him with that Give me Percy Jackson or I’ll kill you expression, Leo had thought of blondes as much too smart and much too dangerous.

Annabeth's face, her blond hair and gray eyes, the way she laughed, threw her arms around him, and gave him a kiss whenever he did something stupid. She must have kissed me a lot, Percy thought.

Blonde on Blonde - Blonde on Blonde is the seventh studio album by American singer-songwriter Bob Dylan, released on June 20, 1966 by Columbia Records. Recording sessions

Blonde stereotype - Blonde stereotypes are stereotypes of blond-haired women. Sub-types include the "blonde bombshell" and the "dumb blonde". Blondes are differently stereotyped

Legally Blonde - Legally Blonde is a 2001 American comedy film based on Amanda Brown's novel of the same name, scripted by Karen McCullah Lutz and Kirsten Smith, and directed

Atomic Blonde - Atomic Blonde is a 2017 American action thriller film based on the 2012 graphic novel The Coldest City, which revolves around a spy who has to find a list

Platinum Blonde - Platinum Blonde may refer to: Platinum Blonde (band), a Canadian New Wave music band, popular in the 1980s Platinum Blonde (album), 1983 debut EP by the

Blonde (upcoming film) - Blonde is an upcoming drama film written and directed by Andrew Dominik and based on the novel of the same name by Joyce Carol Oates. A fictionalized take

Blonde (disambiguation) - Blonde is a hair color. Blonde may also refer to: Blonde Ale, a type of beer Blonde (2001 film), a film on the life of Marilyn Monroe Blonde (1950 film)

Strawberry blonde - Strawberry-blonde or blond may refer to: Strawberry blonde (hair color) The Strawberry Blonde, a 1941 film directed by Raoul Walsh Strawberry Blonde (band)

Blonde on Blonde (disambiguation) - Blonde on Blonde is a 1966 studio album by American singer-songwriter Bob Dylan. Blonde on Blonde may also refer to: Blonde on Blonde (rock group), a

You can sleep with a blonde, you can sleep with a brunette, but you'll never get any sleep with a redhead!

When I was in Mecca I noticed that their, they had no color problem.

That they had people there whose eyes were blue and people there whose eyes were black, people whose skin was white, people whose skin was black, people whose hair was blond, people whose hair was black, from the whitest white person to the blackest black person.

I'm a natural blonde, but I feel like a brunette.

Blonde is dumb comedy, red hair is smart, sexy comedy.

When I'm a blonde, I can say the world is purple, and they'll believe me because they weren't listening to me.

I just think that people take me a little more seriously as a brunette.

I don't know if that's just because of a societal preconceived notion that all blondes are stupid, but it's a different kind of attitude.

I'm blonde and tanned and normal-sized! I'm sweet, shy, funny, have a big heart and I'm nice - and I like to eat.

The world believes all blondes are stupid and brunettes are smarter. Well, I disagree.

It is great to be a blonde. With low expectations it's very easy to surprise people.

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