quote by Lewis Grizzard

The only way that I could figure they could improve upon Coca-Cola, one of life's most delightful elixirs, which studies prove will heal the sick and occasionally raise the dead, is to put bourbon in it.

— Lewis Grizzard

Craziest Bourbon quotations

Take a lover who looks at you like maybe you are a bourbon biscuit.

I know folks all have a tizzy about it, but I like a little bourbon of an evening. It helps me sleep. I don't much care what they say about it.

A man can take a little bourbon without getting drunk, but if you hold his mouth open and pour in a quart, he's going to get sick on it.

How well I remember my first encounter with The Devil'ss Brew.

I happened to stumble across a case of bourbon - and went right on stumbling for several days thereafter.

I was brought up to believe that Scotch whisky would need a tax preference to survive in competition with Kentucky bourbon.

Sure I eat what I advertise. Sure I eat Wheaties for breakfast. A good bowl of Wheaties with bourbon can't be beat.

Bourbon does for me what the piece of cake did for Proust.

Nothing is so musical as the sound of pouring bourbon for the first drink on a Sunday morning. Not Bach or Schubert or any of those masters.

Between 9 and 10 AM the American radio is concerned almost exclusively with love. It seems a little like ending breakfast with a stiff bourbon.

It is impossible that had Buonaparte descended from a race of vegetable feeders that he could have had either the inclination or the power to ascend the throne of the Bourbons.

I'm not out there screaming that women are drinking bourbon, but I think it's a great beverage as an option. I've got nothing against drinking a Cosmo or Martini. It's not like one is judging the other. It's just delicious and slow and steady, and there's something about sipping a bourbon that to me is very relaxing.

Bourbon's the only drink. You can take all that champagne stuff and pour it down the English Channel. Well, why wait 80 years before you can drink the stuff? Great vineyards, huge barrels aging forever, poor little old monks running around testing it, just so some woman in Tulsa, Oklahoma can say it tickles her nose.

You say tomato, I say bourbon and coke.

I have never in my life seen a Kentuckian who didn't have a gun, a pack of cards, and a jug of whiskey.

We could say that people who eat grits, listen to country music, follow stock-car racing, support corporal punishment in the schools, hunt 'possum, go to Baptist churches and prefer bourbon to Scotch are likely to be Southerners.

Well I ain't seen my baby since I don't know when, I've been drinking bourbon whiskey, scotch and gin Gonna get high man I'm gonna get loose, Need me a triple shot of that juice Gonna get drunk don't you have no fear I want one bourbon, one scotch and one beer One bourbon, one scotch, one beer.

In economics, we borrowed from the Bourbons;

in foreign policy, we drew on themes fashioned by the nomad warriors of the Eurasian steppes. In spiritual matters, we emulated the braying intolerance of our archenemies, the Shite fundamentalists.

It's one thing to ask your bank manager for an overdraft to buy 500 begonias for the borders in Haslemere, but quite another to seek financial succour to avail oneself of the 5-2 they're offering on lie de Bourbon for the St Leger.

I wanna get drunk 'til I'm off my mind. One bourbon, one scotch, and one beer.

If it's not bourbon or sweatpants, it's going in the garbage.

... No, don't get creative. Now is not a creative time. Now is a bourbon and sweatpants time.

I like my whisky old and my women young.

There's no app for a bourbon buzz on a warm day in a cool, dark bar.

The world will always want a drink.

(Carmine Crocco) A farm-labourer and cowherd, had joined the Bourbon army, killed a comrade in a brawl, deserted and lived as an outlaw for ten years. He joined the liberal insurgents in 1860 in the hope of an amnesty for his past offences, and subsequently became the most formidable guerilla chief and leader of men on the Bourbon side.

I love coffee in a cup, little fuzzy pups, bourbon in a glass, and grass.

Val, I'm on Bourbon—” “I will not venture down that street of crass iniquities and plebeian horror, Acheron. It is the cesspit of humanity. Don‟t even ask it.” Ash rolled his eyes at the Roman‟s arrogant tone. “I need you in the swamp.” Silence answered him. "We have a situation." “Where do you need me?

Let us candidly admit that there are shameful blemishes on the American past, of which the worst by far is rum. Nevertheless, we have improved man's lot and enriched his civilization with rye, bourbon and the Martini cocktail. In all history has any other nation done so much?

For watching sports, I tend to drink Guinness;

early evenings always begin well with a Grey Goose and tonic with plenty of lime; and on a cold winters night, theres nothing quite like a glass of Black Maple Hill... an absolute peach of a bourbon.

From Bourbon Street to Baton Rouge, the freaks come out at night in Louisiana.

And nowhere are they more raucous and unnerving than at Tiger Stadium.

I am Bourbon as a matter of honour, royalist according to reason and conviction, and republican by taste and character.

Sitting up all night would be pointless if somebody you loved wasn't sitting up with you, picking out music to play and helping you kill the bourbon. Walking by yourself in the rain is for college kids who think loneliness makes poets.

Take Texas the way Texas takes bourbon. Straight. It goes down easier.

I wouldn't want them [kids] to raid my liquor cabinet and glug down my bourbon either.

I was drinking a lot of bourbon. I was miserable. I was starting to get work, but it wasn't remotely satisfying. It was garbage compared to the theater I was doing.

Over the years, he [Everett Dirksen] developed a style of infinitely subtle fustian, whose effect can still be remotely approximated by sipping twelve-year-old bourbon, straight, while reading Dickens aloud, in a sort of sepulchral purr.

famous quotes