quote by Mitch Hedberg

I want to get a vending machine, with fun sized candy bars, and the glass in front is a magnifying glass. You'll be mad, but it will be too late.

— Mitch Hedberg

Off-limits Candy Bar quotations

Truth-tellers are not always palatable. There is a preference for candy bars.

Candy bar quote Don't look for a partner who is eye candy. Look for a partner who is soul food.
Don't look for a partner who is eye candy. Look for a partner who is soul food.

I like vending machines, because snacks are better when they fall.

If I buy a candy bar at the store, oftentimes I will drop it so that is achieves its maximum flavor potential.

Candy bar quote Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing the monkey bars. You hav
Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing the monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.

If you put a Mars bar in one of Glenn Hughes’ hands and a bass in the other, he’ll choose the Mars bar.

You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.

Whoever thought a tiny candy bar should be called fun size was a moron.

If I played in New York, they'd name a candy bar after me.

The Kit Kat candy bar has the name Kit Kat imprinted into the chocolate.

That robs you of chocolate! That's a clever chocolate-saving technique.

I like crazy, childlike, candy bar-filled cakes with gooey caramel, chocolate-covered nuts, marshmallows, and the like.

October, baptize me with leaves! Swaddle me in corduroy and nurse me with split pea soup. October, tuck tiny candy bars in my pockets and carve my smile into a thousand pumpkins. O autumn! O teakettle! O grace!

I was just a kid. I think I stole a candy bar. I remember feeling so terrible. It was the worst shock. I was probably 7. That's my least favorite feeling: guilt.

I get the Reese's candy bar. You look at that, there's an apostrophe-s there. That means the candy bar is his. I didn't know that. Next time you're eating a Reese's candy bar, and a guy named Reese comes by and says, "Gimme that", you better hand it over.

In fact, two slices of whole wheat bread increase blood sugar to a higher level than a candy bar does. And then, after about two hours, your blood sugar plunges and you get shaky, your brain feels foggy, you're hungry.

I like it when you reach into a vending machine to grab your candy bar, and that flap goes up to block you from reaching up? That's a good invention. Before that, it was hard times for the vending machine owners. "Yeah, what candy bar are you getting?" "That one, and every one on the bottom row!"

There's a list of foods I can't have in the house.

Peanut butter, can't have that in the house. Potato chips, can't have that in the house. Random little small mini candy bars, don't even think about it. I just have to watch everything. I have to stay between 1500 and 1600 calories a day. That's it.

I like vending machines, because snacks are better when they fall.

Therefore, wheat products elevate blood sugar levels more than virtually any other carbohydrate, from beans to candy bars.

When I started Dylan's Candy Bar in 2001, I wanted it to be a place that merged my love of pop culture, fashion, art and music with candy. Since then, we have been fortunate to pioneer artistic partnerships with many legends.

No candy bars unless I've had a low blood sugar where I'm shaky

Aside from some extra fiber, eating two slices of whole wheat bread is really little different, and often worse, than drinking a can of sugar-sweetened soda or eating a sugary candy bar.

After an era of everything being super-sized, who would have thought that major companies would be racing to market smaller, lower-calorie versions of their snacks and beverages - from half-sized candy bars to little, mini soda cans? We see it everywhere we go.

Cavities are made by sugar. So if you need to dig a hole, then lay down some candy bars!

We as parents are our children's first and best role models, and this is particularly true when it comes to their health. ...We can't lie around on the couch eating French fries and candy bars and expect our kids to eat carrots and run around the block.

After watching my first World Series in 1977, I wanted to be Reggie Jackson.

I bought a big Reggie poster. I ate Reggie candy bars. I entered a phase during which I insisted on having the same style of glasses Reggie had: gold wire frames with the double bar across.

If I am acting out in any particular way that is harmful to myself - without a shadow of doubt, there is a feeling suppressed under wanting that second candy bar. Often, it is that little voice I haven't paid attention to. It's generally not the adult voice. If I take a moment to address that and figure out what that is, the desire for the candy bar seems to dissipate.

America is becoming a drug infested nation.

Drugs are becoming cheaper than candy bars. We are not going to let it happen any longer.

Whoever thought to name a candy bar Butterfinger has either never seen Last Tango In Paris or seen it far too many times.

I don't really have one type favorite type of candy.

When I was younger we used to always go to the rich neighborhoods where they give out the big candy bars, not the little fun-sized ones. We'd go back two and three times, hit them again and again. They didn't care and we loved it.

If you eat one less candy bar or donut a day, you're doing your body some good.

A $10 million windfall? At today's prices, I'd feel almost as rich as I did one day in 1936 when I found a dime on the sidewalk and blew the whole wad on 20 Mary Jane candy bars, a box of jujubes, and a double feature.

I think it's sinful to give the audience material it knows already, whether the material is about race relations or the car culture or the depiction and placement of a candy bar.

I had teeth that stuck out so far, I used to eat other kids' candy bars by accident.

On the good ship Lollipop Its a sweet trip To the candy shop Where bon-bon's play, On the sunny beach Of peppermint bay Lemonade stands, Everywhere Crackerjack bands, Fill the air, And there you are, Happy landings on a chocolate bar. See the sugar bowl Do a tootsie roll In a big bad devils food cake, If you eat too much, Oh, oh, You'll awake, With a tummy ache.

Israel is the very embodiment of Jewish continuity: It is the only nation on earth that inhabits the same land, bears the same name, speaks the same language, and worships the same God that it did 3,000 years ago. You dig the soil and you find pottery from Davidic times, coins from Bar Kokhba, and 2,000-year-old scrolls written in a script remarkably like the one that today advertises ice cream at the corner candy store.

Of course kids should pay taxes.Tell littlie johnny if he wants to ride his bicycle on the sidewalk instead of in the mud,he's got to pay3 more pennies when he buys a candy bar.