65 Funniness Quotes To Inspire You

Following is our list of funniness quotations and slogans full of insightful wisdom and perspective about .

Short Funniness Quotes

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  • Instead of past, present and future, I'd prefer chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry. — Ashleigh Brilliant
  • I came from a big family. As a matter of fact, I never got to sleep alone until I was married. — Lewis Grizzard
  • Destiny may ride with us today, but there is no reason for it to interfere with lunch. — Peter The Great
  • Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand. — Woody Allen
  • Caramels are only a fad. Chocolate is a permanent thing. — Milton S. Hershey
  • We were together. I forget the rest. — Walt Whitman
  • If you are not your own doctor, you are a fool. — Hippocrates
  • The less Holy Spirit we have, the more cake and coffee we need to keep the church going. — Reinhard Bonnke
  • People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day. — A. A. Milne
  • If exposure of body is modernism, then animals are more modern than humans. — Zakir Naik
Funniness quote To thrive in life you need three bones. A wishbone. A backbone. And a funny bone
To thrive in life you need three bones. A wishbone. A backbone. And a funny bone.

Love Kissing Quotes

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Funniness quote

Life is short. Kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly — Paulo Coelho

Relax. Refresh. Renew. Play. Sing. Laugh. Enjoy. Forgive. Dance. Love. Hug. Share. Kiss. Create. Explore. Hope. Listen. Dare. Trust. Dream. Learn. TODAY! — Steve Maraboli

Funniness quote

In love, there is always one who kisses and one who offers the cheek. — Proverbs

Funniness quote Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything
Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything is different.

A loving relationship is one in which the loved one is free to be himself -- to laugh with me, but never at me; to cry with me, but never because of me; to love life, to love himself, to love being loved. Such a relationship is based upon freedom and can never grow in a jealous heart — Leo Buscaglia

Life is short, Break the Rules. Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably And never regret ANYTHING That makes you smile. — Mark Twain

Because there's nothing more beautiful than the way the ocean refuses to stop kissing the shoreline, no matter how many times it's sent away. — Sarah Kay

Funniness quote

it's a smile, it's a kiss, it's a sip of wine ... it's summertime! — Kenny Chesney

I was born when you kissed me. I died when you left me. I lived a few weeks while you loved me. — Humphrey Bogart

Let the rain sing you a lullaby. — Langston Hughes

If I were to meet the slave-traders who kidnapped me and even those who tortured me, I would kneel and kiss their hands, for if that did not happen, I would not be a Christian and Religious today... The Lord has loved me so much: we must love everyone... we must be compassionate! — Josephine Bakhita

People Writing About Funniness

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Name Quotes Likes
Read quotes by Ashleigh Brilliant

Ashleigh Brilliant
quotes on life, success and constitution

320 2153
Read quotes by Lewis Grizzard

Lewis Grizzard
quotes on yankees, south

33 12594
Read quotes by Woody Allen

Woody Allen
quotes on life, marriage and love

822 6609
Read quotes by Milton S. Hershey

Milton S. Hershey
quotes on education, love

11 2247
Read quotes by Walt Whitman

Walt Whitman
quotes on love, life and nature

490 8628
Read quotes by Hippocrates

quotes on health, medicine and fasting

152 7089

More Funniness Quotes

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Funniness quote by Milton S. Hershey

Caramels are only a fad. Chocolate is a permanent thing. — Milton S. Hershey

Funniness quote by Walt Whitman

We were together. I forget the rest. — Walt Whitman

Funniness quote by Zakir Naik

If exposure of body is modernism, then animals are more modern than humans. — Zakir Naik

Funniness quote by Roddy Piper

I came here to chew bubble gum and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubble gum. — Roddy Piper

Funniness quote by Edward Abbey

The duty of a patriot is to protect his country from its government. — Edward Abbey

Funniness quote by Prince

Act your age, not your shoe size. — Prince

Funniness quote by Gene Wilder

The suspense is terrible. I hope it'll last. — Gene Wilder

Funniness quote by Drake

I was born to make mistakes, not to fake perfection — Drake

Funniness quote by Stephen Hawking

Life would be tragic if it weren't funny. Laugh at the Absurdity of LifeStephen Hawking

Funniness quote by John Wayne

Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid. — John Wayne

Funniness quote by Unknown Author

Show me who your friends are, and I will tell you what you are. — Unknown Author

Funniness quote by Billy Crystal

Women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place. — Billy Crystal

Funniness quote by Bob Marley

love the life you live. live the life you love. — Bob Marley

Funniness quote by Mark Twain

Worrying is like paying a debt you don't owe. — Mark Twain

Funniness quote by Will Rogers

The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces. — Will Rogers

Funniness quote by Colin McRae

Straight roads are for fast cars, turns are for fast drivers. — Colin McRae

Funniness quote by George Carlin

In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem. — George Carlin

Funniness quote by W. Edwards Deming

In God we trust; all others bring data. — W. Edwards Deming

Funniness quote by Eminem

You don't get another chance, life is no Nintendo game. — Eminem

Funniness quote by David Carson

Graphic design will save the world right after rock and roll does. — David Carson

Funniness quote by Anton Chekhov

What a fine weather today! Can’t choose whether to drink tea or to hang myself. — Anton Chekhov

Funniness quote by Hans Asperger

It seems that for success in science or art, a dash of autism is essential. — Hans Asperger

Funniness quote by Meister Eckhart

Be willing to be a beginner every single morning. — Meister Eckhart

Funniness quote by Voltaire

God created sex. Priests created marriage. — Voltaire

Funniness quote by William Wordsworth

Come grow old with me. The best is yet to be. — William Wordsworth

Funniness quote by Queen Elizabeth II

I have to be seen to be believed. — Queen Elizabeth II

Funniness quote by Arnold Palmer

It's a funny thing, the more I practice the luckier I get. — Arnold Palmer

Funniness quote by Ann Landers

If you want your children to listen, try talking softly - to someone else. — Ann Landers

Funniness quote by Woody Guthrie

Some men rob you with a six-gun -- others rob you with a fountain pen. — Woody Guthrie

Funniness quote by Johann Sebastian Bach

Without my morning coffee I'm just like a dried up piece of roast goat. — Johann Sebastian Bach

Funniness quote by Thomas Keller

A recipe has no soul. You, as the cook, must bring soul to the recipe. — Thomas Keller

Funniness quote by Eminem

Love is just a word, but you bring it definition. — Eminem

Funniness quote by Steven Wright

Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts. — Steven Wright

Funniness quote by Drake

A girl should have two things: a smile, and a guy who inspires it. — Drake

Funniness quote by Robin Williams

I wonder what chairs think about all day: "Oh, here comes another asshole." — Robin Williams

Funniness quote by Albert Camus

Should I kill myself, or have a cup of coffee? — Albert Camus

Funniness quote by Wilhelm II

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. — Wilhelm II

Funniness quote by Massimo Vignelli

If you can design one thing, you can design everything. — Massimo Vignelli

Funniness quote by J. Paul Getty

I'd rather have 1% of the effort of 100 men than 100% of my own effort. — J. Paul Getty

Funniness quote by Albert Einstein

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory. — Albert Einstein

Funniness quote by Richard Pryor

I'm not addicted to cocaine. I just like the way it smells. — Richard Pryor

Funniness quote by Steven Wright

Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny? — Steven Wright

Funniness quote by Carrie Fisher

If my life wasn't funny it would just be true, and that is unacceptable. — Carrie Fisher

Funniness quote by Flannery O'Connor

You shall know the truth, and it will make you odd. — Flannery O'Connor

Funniness quote by Gertrude Stein

Whoever said money can't buy happiness didn't know where to shop — Gertrude Stein

In Conclusion

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About the author

This collection is managed by , with an extensive background in quote curation. They have meticulously gathered, researched, and compiled the quotes featured on this page. Every quote has been diligently cross-verified for its origin, its authenticity, and its potential influence on our readership.


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