Reefer makes darkies think they're as good as white men.— Harry J. Anslinger
Remarkable Funny Drug quotations
To thrive in life you need three bones. A wishbone. A backbone. And a funny bone.
Life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life, so let's all get wasted and have the time of our lives.
A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything is different.
I'm not addicted to cocaine. I just like the way it smells.
Cocaine is God's way of telling you you are making too much money.
All my life I’ve been a lady bruiser, a wrong chooser, school refuser, drug abuser, born loser; clothes bummy, nose runny, it wasn’t funny
I tried to be normal once. Worst to minutes of my life.
A drug is not bad. A drug is a chemical compound. The problem comes in when people who take drugs treat them like a license to behave like an asshole.
Why is there such controversy about drug testing? I know plenty of guys who'd be willing to test any drug they can come up with.
In the Sixties people took acid to make the world weird.
Now the world is weird, people take Prozac to make it normal.
Time is a drug. Too much of it kills you.
I love my fed-ex guy cause he's a drug dealer and he don't even know it...and he's always on time.
Cocaine is like really evil coffee.
Let me see if I've got this Santa business straight.
You say he wears a beard, has no discernible source of income and flies to cities all over the world under cover of darkness? You sure this guy isn't laundering illegal drug money?
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
I have nothing to declare but my genius, and this four-kilo bag of cocaine.
I think that everything should be made available to everybody, and I mean LSD, cocaine, codeine, grass, opium, the works. Nothing on earth available to any man should be confiscated and made unlawful by other men in more seemingly powerful and advantageous positions.
There's nothing wrong with you that a little Prozac and a polo mallet can't cure.
Trust me, You can dance.
Why is marijuana against the law? It grows naturally upon our planet.
Doesn’t the idea of making nature against the law seem to you a bit . . . unnatural?
I don't do drugs. If I want a rush I just stand up when I'm not expecting it.
I loved when Bush came out and said, 'We are losing the war against drugs.
' You know what that implies? There's a war being fought, and the people on drugs are winning it.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
I'm in favour of drug tests, just so long as they are multiple choice.
Purple Haze all in my brain, lately things don't seem the same.
Actin' funny but I don't know why. 'Scuse me while I kiss the sky.
It (LSD) opened my eyes. We only use one-tenth of our brain. Just think of what we could accomplish if we could only tap that hidden part! It would mean a whole new world if the politicians would take LSD. There wouldn't be any more war or poverty or famine.
From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.
Whether you sniff it smoke it eat it or shove it up your ass the result is the same: addiction.
All illegal narcotics are medicinal. Boredom is a disease worse than cancer. Drugs cure it, with little or no side effects if used as directed. Life's temporary for a reason, it gets boring after awhile. You should be inventing new drugs is what you should be doing! Newer, crazier drugs... and more holes, that's what you ladies need!
I had someone at the Houston police station shoot me with heroin so I could do a story about it. The experience was a special kind of hell. I came out understanding full well how one could be addicted to 'smack,' and quickly.
A strong positive mental attitude will create more miracles than any wonder drug.
Federal and state laws (should) be changed to no longer make it a crime to possess marijuana for private use.
I tried marijuana once. I did not inhale.
Hats off to drug abusers everywhere.
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
Avoid using cigarettes, alcohol, and drugs as alternatives to being an interesting person.
I say no to drugs, but they don't listen.
Success and failure are both difficult to endure.
Along with success come drugs, divorce, fornication, bullying, travel, meditation, medication, depression, neurosis and suicide. With failure comes failure.
Money can't buy happiness. But it sure can rent it for awhile.
LSD is a psychedelic drug which occasionally causes psychotic behavior in people who have NOT taken it.
A friend gave me a drug for attention deficit disorder, because he's afflicted, but I'm not. So what happened to me is I suddenly had an extra-long attention span. People would tell me a story, and it would end, and I'd get all mad. "Come on, man, there has to be more to that story."
I tried sniffing Coke once, but the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.
The dead drug leaves a ghost behind. At certain hours it haunts the house.
All drugs of any interest to any moderately intelligent person in America are now illegal.