Funny Hate Quotes

Haters are just confused admirers because they can't figure out the reason why everyone loves you.

I hate reality but it's still the best place to get a good steak.

To solve the human equation, we need to add love, subtract hate, multiply good, and divide between truth and error.

It's important for me to treat a girlfriend with respect.

My mum would be horrified if I behaved any differently - and I have sisters, and would hate for them to be treated badly by guys.

I hate storms, but calms undermine my spirits.

Hate me for who I am, I don't care. At least I'm not pretending to be someone I'm not.

I just hate stupid people. They should have to wear signs that say 'I'm Stupid.' That way you wouldn't rely on them, and you wouldn't ask them for nothing.

Oh how I hate you. I hate you so much it gives me energy. I have to get up early in the morning just to hate you, because there's not enough time in the day! Please GO AWAY!

Know what you're talking about.

For every book you buy, you should buy the time to read it.

I'm interested in stories which insist on a dog fails-to-eat-dog kind of world.

I hate misanthropy, want to believe that there's a possibility that we might all be redeemed, that hope deferred makes the soul sick, that our humanity is fragile, funny, common, crazy, full of the longing for love, the failure of love.

People are always introducing me as Sarah Silverman, Jewish comedienne.

I hate that! I wish people would see me for who I really am — I'm white!

There ain't no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them. - Mark Twain, author Making the team is one thing, becoming a team is another.

There are no uninteresting things, only uninterested people.

The sea hates a coward.

I hate rap music, which to me sounds like a bunch of angry men shouting, possibly because the person who was supposed to provide them with a melody never showed up.

I love humanity but I hate people.

A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it.

There's not enough psychedelic stuff on TV.

I want the world to be a bit weirder than it is. I hate reality, so I hate reality TV. But I love Columbo.

I put a What Would Jesus Do bracelet on my Jewish friend's wrist and it burned his skin. He threw it on the ground, it turned into a serpent, we both started laughing. We left it there, we hate snakes. We think they're slimy, even though we know they're not.

Most people hate the taste of beer - to begin with.

It is, however, a prejudice that many people have been able to overcome.

When I was a kid my family was really poor and I remember one Halloween I wanted to dress up really scary and my parents came home with a duck costume. I wore that costume for years! I hated it.

I hate people who cry around me. I'm not friends with them anymore. Especially girls. Cuz girls are crying all the time. It's like, 'Shut up.'

Remember what I told you. If they hated me, they will hate you.

For the record, I hate skiing... and if you get killed doing it, GOOD.

When I was a kid I used to hate getting picked for team sports.

It would be the fit and sporty guys over there. And me and the fat kids over here. Those kids were fat! One girl had to be cut out a hula hoop.

Humor is the oxygen of children's literature.

There's a lot of competition for children's time, but even kids who hate to read want to read a funny book.

It's funny how everyone hates witch hunts... until they see a witch.

In an interview, Paris Hilton said that of her and her sister, "People love to hate us. But when you know us, you love us. And if you really get to know us, you get gonorrhea."

I played in a death-metal band. People either loved us or hated us. Or they thought we were OK.

Don't steal - the government hates competition!

These walls are funny. First you hate 'em, then you get used to 'em. Enough time passes, you get so you depend on them. That's institutionalized.

Respect your haters. They're the only ones who think you're better than them.

An old pop music producer once said that there are really only four kinds of song a person can write: "I love you/I hate you/go away/come back!" That's a funny observation.