quote by Gertrude Stein

Whoever said money can't buy happiness didn't know where to shop

— Gertrude Stein

Most Powerful Funny Investment quotations

Someone stole all my credit cards, but I won't be reporting it.

The thief spends less than my wife did

Funny investment quote To thrive in life you need three bones. A wishbone. A backbone. And a funny bone
To thrive in life you need three bones. A wishbone. A backbone. And a funny bone.

Ever wonder about those people who spend $2 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backward.

Funny investment quote Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything
Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything is different.

Choosing individual stocks without any idea of what you're looking for is like running through a dynamite factory with a burning match. You may live, but you're still an idiot.

If inflation continues to soar, you're going to have to work like a dog just to live like one

Money is the best deodorant.

Funny investment quote I tried to be normal once. Worst to minutes of my life.
I tried to be normal once. Worst to minutes of my life.
45

It's always funny to me when people use the phrase 'Best guitar player in the world'. There are too many variables such as technique, uniqueness, emotional investment in the notes, etc. But If I had to pick one, it would be Tommy Emmanuel. Watching him perform can be a study in artistic and virtuosic human achievement.

Most successful investors, in fact, do nothing most of the time.

Shortly after I met my mentor he asked me, ‘Mr.

Rohn, how much money have you saved and invested over the last six years?’ And I said, ‘None.’ He then asked, ‘Who sold you on that plan?’

Funny investment quote Your body will be around a lot longer than that expensive handbag. Invest in you
Your body will be around a lot longer than that expensive handbag. Invest in yourself.

One of the best investors around, Joel Greenblatt, has written a popular, charming and funny book about investing in great companies at low P/E multiples. To simplify an already simple book, great companies are generally measured as companies that can generate lots of profit without requiring a lot of capital. This means that they have high ROEs.

Dogs have no money. Isn't that amazing? They're broke their entire lives. But they get through. You know why dogs have no money? .. No Pockets.

Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted.

Funny investment quote Never miss a good chance to shut up.
Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Figures often beguile me, particularly when I have the arranging of them myself;

in which case the remark attributed to Disraeli would often apply with justice and force: "There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics."

Generosity is the best investment.

Selfish men make the best lovers. They're prepared to invest in the women's pleasures so that they can collect an even bigger dividend for themselves.

Funny investment quote Travel is an investment in yourself.
Travel is an investment in yourself.

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Every project you're involved in and any character that you're invested in .

.. you learn a message from that experience. I know that sounds a little cheesy, but it's true. Its kind of funny the parallel that I drew from that, you kind of learn something and you get to apply it to the next thing.

I am a pretty good actor. Most of my friendships are based on the fact that I pretend to be outgoing and funny in social situations, but when I get home, I tend to isolate myself because I am actually somewhat bipolar and introverted. So it is really hard for me to invest time into a relationship because I get kind of freaked out by the thought of doing something that part of my mind keeps telling me is "unproductive".

Funny investment quote Trust me, You can dance.
Trust me, You can dance.
25

You have to have that emotional investment in the jokes that you're saying otherwise they actually don't work. You can say exactly the same thing, but if you don't believe it's funny at the time that you're saying it, it won't be.

It's funny because the voice-over world is definitely another career.

It's another outlet to be creative. But, I'm just not invested, in the way that I am with film and television.

It's so funny because, when the other world was being hatched and conceived, I just kept hearing, "Don't do that! That's a huge mistake! People love your characters. Why go to these new ones?" And I was like, "No, we can do this! I'm invested. Why wouldn't they be?"

Funny investment quote Save your love for the one who's worth the investment.
Save your love for the one who's worth the investment.
23

People are funny -- they are able to project personality onto anything.

I remember as a kid I spent a $ 5 bill once and felt so bad because the other $ 5 bill was now going to be lonely without all the other bills I had in my wallet, you just invest these dead things with life and that is our tendency as people. So animation takes advantage of that, grabs on to it, and runs with it.

I've never claimed that this is investment art.

When we first started out, all the art colleges and universities across the country would sort of badmouth what we were doing. It's funny that a lot of them now are sending us letters saying, 'We may not totally agree with the way you paint, but we appreciate what you're doing, because you're sending literally thousands of people into art colleges.'

I like to invest as a performer in the director's vision and then bring a sense of reality to whatever I'm doing, whether it's comedy or whether it's drama, and trust that they're going to tell me if something's reading as funny or if it's reading as dramatic or reading in the right tone.

Funny investment quote I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

Back then, if you had a sore arm, the only people concerned were you and your wife. Now it's you, your wife, your agent, your investment counselor, your stockbroker, and your publisher.

Beautiful women must think about their beauty as capitalists think about their investments or politicians about their majorities; it is all they have to insure their places in the world.

I don't read economic forecasts. I don't read the funny papers.

Funny investment quote From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.
From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.

Marriage is an investment which pays dividends if you pay interest.

Wealth and rank are what men desire, but unless they be obtained in the right way they may not be possessed. Poverty and obscurity are what men detest; but unless prosperity be brought about in the right way, they are not to be abandoned.

Really, if that’s the case, you need to stop letting your mother dress you funny. It’s hard to take anyone serious as a killer when he looks like an investment banker. The only part of me that’s nervous is my checkbook. (Kat)