The biggest killer on the planet is stress and I still think the best medicine is and always has been cannabis.

— Willie Nelson

Profound Funny Marijuana quotations

Reefer makes darkies think they're as good as white men.

Funny marijuana quote To thrive in life you need three bones. A wishbone. A backbone. And a funny bone
To thrive in life you need three bones. A wishbone. A backbone. And a funny bone.

Hemp is of first necessity to the wealth & protection of the country.

Funny marijuana quote Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything
Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything is different.

Why is marijuana against the law? It grows naturally upon our planet.

Doesn’t the idea of making nature against the law seem to you a bit . . . unnatural?

Just hit the blunt one time and see if it don't change your perception on whats important in your life.

I don't think [pot] is more dangerous than alcohol.

Funny marijuana quote I tried to be normal once. Worst to minutes of my life.
I tried to be normal once. Worst to minutes of my life.
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When I was a kid, I inhaled. Frequently. That was the point.

I now have absolute proof that smoking even one marijuana cigarette is equal in brain damage to being on Bikini Island during an H-bomb blast

Weed Quotes 1

Alcohol and marijuana, if used in moderation, plus loud, usually low-class music, make stress and boredom infinitely more bearable.

Funny marijuana quote Never miss a good chance to shut up.
Never miss a good chance to shut up.

We shall, by and by, want a world of hemp more for our own consumption.

I want a Goddamn strong statement on marijuana, I mean one that just tears the ass out of them. You know, its a funny thing, every one of the bastards that are out for legalizing marijuana is Jewish.

Federal and state laws (should) be changed to no longer make it a crime to possess marijuana for private use.

Funny marijuana quote Trust me, You can dance.
Trust me, You can dance.
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Smoking helped put me in touch with the realm of the senses.

Forty million Americans smoked marijuana;

the only ones who didn’t like it were Judge Ginsberg, Clarence Thomas and Bill Clinton.

I experimented with marijuana a time or two.

Funny marijuana quote I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

I tried marijuana once. I did not inhale.

When I was in England, I experimented with marijuana a time or two, and I didn’t like it, and I didn’t inhale, and I never tried again.

I think pot should be legal. I don’t smoke it, but I like the smell of it.

Funny marijuana quote From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.
From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.

To make marijuana against the law is like saying God made a big mistake.

I spent nine days in the Downtown Los Angeles City Jail.

The judge gave me a suspended sentence and I went to work that night - wailed just like nothing happened. What strucked me funny though - I laughed real loud when several movie stars came up to the bandstand while we played a dance set and told me, when they heard about me getting caught with marijuana, they thought marijuana was a chick. Woo boy - that really fractured me!

I don't consider weed to be any worse than having a beer.

Funny marijuana quote Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.

I used to smoke marijuana. But I'll tell you something: I would only smoke it in the late evening. Oh, occasionally the early evening, but usually the late evening - or the mid-evening. Just the early evening, midevening and late evening. Occasionally, early afternoon, early mid-afternoon, or perhaps the late-midafternoon. Oh, sometimes the early-mid-late-early morning. . . But never at dusk!

I smoked pot in college and in the Army.

An American judo fighter was expelled from the Olympics after testing positive for marijuana. Officials became suspicious when he kept stopping the match and saying, 'What are we fighting for, man?'

Funny marijuana quote Money can't buy happiness. But it sure can rent it for awhile.
Money can't buy happiness. But it sure can rent it for awhile.

The first time I smoked was at home with my mother and stepfather;

they were like, If you are going to do this, we'd rather you did this with us.

You bet I did and I enjoyed it.

Of course I know how to roll a joint.

Funny marijuana quote Let's be pretty kind. Pretty funny. Pretty smart. Pretty strong
Let's be pretty kind. Pretty funny. Pretty smart. Pretty strong

Marijuana is quite possibly the finest of intoxicants.

It has been scientifically proven, for decades, to be much less harmful to the body than alcohol when used on a regular basis.

I got high, and forgot I wasn't supposed to get high.

I enjoy smoking cannabis and see no harm in it

Funny marijuana quote When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

I know you're supposed to tell kids not to do drugs, but, kids, do it! Do weed! Don't do the other stuff, but weed is good

I've been smoking marijuana for 44 years now, and ... I think it's a tremendous blessing.

Funny how things change when you got a liquor in ya: You're quicker with the tongue, givin' me rhythm now. Block the music and the people out to admire the love, The nerve of us...impervious to the entire club. And like marijuana shotguns, let's blow this joint, It's pointless to stay here, so let me anoint.

By regulating marijuana, we can put black market drug dealers out of business and eliminate the rebellious allure that attracts young people.

Most of the players in the league use marijuana, and I have and do partake in smoking weed in the offseason sometimes.

Why do I do it? Because I enjoy its effects.

You know, I - why does anybody use any mind-altering substance, you know, because they like the way it makes them feel.

It is beyond my comprehension that any humane person would withhold such a beneficial substance from people in such great need simply because others use it for different purposes.

In our culture, the Native Americans, when two strangers come together.

You know what we do in our culture? We smoke the peace pipe.