Should auld acquaintance be forgot, And never brought to min?— Robert Burns
Successful Funny New Years Eve quotations
New beginnings are often disguised as painful endings.
I would say happy new year, but it's not happy; it's exactly the same as last year except colder.
Never tell your resolution beforehand, or it's twice as onerous a duty.
To thrive in life you need three bones. A wishbone. A backbone. And a funny bone.
One resolution I have made, and try always to keep, is this: ‘To rise above little things’.
Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions.
Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.
From New Year's on the outlook brightens;
good humor lost in a mood of failure returns. I resolve to stop complaining.
Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything is different.
No one ever regarded the first of January with indifference.
My New Year's resolution was to stop saying 'You go, girl' to myself.
My New Year's Resolution List usually starts with the desire to lose between ten and three thousand pounds.
Be patient with yourself, nothing in nature blooms all year.
Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account.
Stir the eggnog, lift the toddy, Happy New Year everybody.
He who breaks a resolution is a weakling; He who makes one is a fool.
When the past calls, let it go to voicemail. It has nothing new to say.
It goes Christmas, New Year's Eve, Valentine's Day.
Is that fair to anyone who's alone? These are all days you gotta be with someone. And if you didn't get around to killing yourself at Christmas or New Year's, boom! There's Valentine's Day. I think there should be one more after Valentine's Day just called, 'Who could love you?'
This bright new year is given me
I'm not a drinker, my body won't tolerate.
..eh...spirits, really. I had two martinis New Years Eve and I tried to hi-jack an elevator and fly it to Cuba.
If you're brave enough to say goodbye, life will reward you with a new hello.
New Year's most glorious light is sweet hope!
What you do for Jewish New Year is you go down to Times Square.
It's a lot quieter than the regular New Year. It's just a few Jews walking around going, "sup?"
Happiness is too many things these days for anyone to wish it on anyone lightly. So let's just wish each other a bileless New Year and leave it at that.
I am always doing what I cannot do yet, in order to learn how to do it.
Should auld acquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind? Should auld acquaintance be forgot and days of auld lang syne? For auld lang syne, my dear, for auld lang syne, we'll take a cup of kindness yet, for auld lang syne.
God, do I hate my little fat tits. You ever pinch your little meat tits and wish you were dead? You ever just stand naked in the mirror. "You little fat-titted mediocre failure!" You ever do that for 3 hours on New Year's Eve.