quote by Reinhard Bonnke

The less Holy Spirit we have, the more cake and coffee we need to keep the church going.

— Reinhard Bonnke

Promising Funny Religious quotations

Religion is like a blind man looking in a black room for a black cat that isn't there, and finding it.

Funny religious quote To thrive in life you need three bones. A wishbone. A backbone. And a funny bone
To thrive in life you need three bones. A wishbone. A backbone. And a funny bone.
Meaningful Funny religious quotes
Visualise all those meaningful funny religious quotes

Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an automobile.

Funny religious quote Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything
Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything is different.

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way.

So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

I've come to view Jesus much the way I view Elvis.

I love the guy but the fan clubs really freak me out.


Christ has not only spoken to us by his life but has also spoken for us by his death.

Funny religious quote I tried to be normal once. Worst to minutes of my life.
I tried to be normal once. Worst to minutes of my life.
45

I’m not a religious person; I would call myself an atheist. I don’t have a good story behind it, I’m just reasonable.

You're basically killing each other to see who's got the better imaginary friend.

'Twas Easter-Sunday. The full-blossomed trees Filled all the air with fragrance and with joy.

Funny religious quote Nothing happens by accident. God is preparing you for great things.
Nothing happens by accident. God is preparing you for great things.

It's a funny thing, when you talk to God, you're religious, but when he talks to you, you're a psychopath.


Religion is like a pair of shoes.....Find one that fits for you, but don't make me wear your shoes.

The most heinous and the most cruel crimes of which history has record have been committed under the cover of religion or equally noble motives.

Funny religious quote Never miss a good chance to shut up.
Never miss a good chance to shut up.

The only church that illuminates is a burning church.

Don't let the past steal your present. This is the message of Christmas: We are never alone.

Christmas is the day that holds all time together.

Funny religious quote Religious wars are basically people killing each other over who has the better i
Religious wars are basically people killing each other over who has the better imaginary friend.

Qualifications of a pastor: the mind of a scholar, the heart of a child, and the hide of a rhinoceros

The bigotry of the nonbeliever is for me nearly as funny as the bigotry of the believer.

The church is like manure. Pile it up, and it stinks up the neighborhood. Spread it out, and it enriches the world.

Funny religious quote Trust me, You can dance.
Trust me, You can dance.
25

To assert that the earth revolves around the sun is as erroneous to claim that Jesus was not born of a virgin".

For I remember it is Easter morn, And life and love and peace are all new born.


Well pleaseth me the sweet time of Easter. That maketh the leaf and the flower come out.

Funny religious quote Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances.
Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances.
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To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance. To a friend, heart. To a customer, service. To all, charity. To every child, a good example. To you, respect.

But from this earth, this grave, this dust, My God shall raise me up, I trust.

Man suffers only because he takes seriously what the gods made for fun.

Funny religious quote I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

That ideology was never going to work, was it? It was just cobbled together from different beliefs: The anti-intellectualism of the Khmer Rouge, the religious persecution of the Nazis, the enforced beard-wearing from the world of folk music, and the segregation and humiliation of women from the world of golf.


Earth's saddest day and gladdest day were just three days apart!

No, I don't know that atheists should be considered as citizens, nor should they be considered as patriots. This is one nation under God.

Funny religious quote Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.

An atheist is a man who has no invisible means of support.

Great little One! whose all-embracing birth Lifts Earth to Heaven, stoops Heaven to Earth.

Funny you mention my dinner parties when I have just suggested that inviting close friends over to share a meal with candlelight and wine at your table could be a form of religious experience for some people. To me its a form of sacrament.

Funny religious quote From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.
From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.

I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith.

It is wonderful to observe the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.

Xmas Trivia: Before it became a major shopping holiday, Christmas is believed to have had a "religious" meaning.

The religion of one age is the literary entertainment of the next.

If God is everywhere, I had concluded, then He is in food.

Therefore, the more I ate the godlier I would become. Impelled by this new religious fervor, I glutted myself like a fanatic.

Say what you will about the sweet miracle of unquestioning faith, I consider a capacity for it terrifying and absolutely vile.