quote by Matt Groening

Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.

— Matt Groening

Provocative Great Simpsons quotations

Great simpsons quote Silence is a source of great strength.

Silence is a source of great strength.

America's health care system is second only to Japan, Canada, Sweden, Great Britain, well ... all of Europe. But you can thank your lucky starts we don't live in Paraguay!

I’ll keep it short and sweet - Family.

Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.

Great simpsons quote Make today so awesome, yesterday gets jealous.

Make today so awesome, yesterday gets jealous.

You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try.' Homer Simpson

It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you place the blame.

Weaseling out of things is important to learn.

It's what separates us from the animals... except the weasel.

Great simpsons quote Great minds discuss ideas.Average minds discuss events.Small minds discuss peopl

Great minds discuss ideas.Average minds discuss events.Small minds discuss people.

First you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women.

Homer no function beer well without.

I like my beer cold, my TV loud, and my homosexuals flaming.

Great simpsons quote Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.

Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.

Oh, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix.

Guilt, remorse. It's what separates us from the animals.

When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle. They're on TV!

Great simpsons quote Failure is a great teacher, and, if you are open to it, every mistake has a less

Failure is a great teacher, and, if you are open to it, every mistake has a lesson to offer.

I've always wondered if there was a God. And now I know there is -- and it's me.

You can't handle the truth!

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day.

Great simpsons quote You need a little bit of insanity to do great things.

You need a little bit of insanity to do great things.

Old people don't need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use.

Art is what separates us from the animals.

If you don't like your job, you don't strike! You just go in every day, and do it really half assed. That's the American way.

Great simpsons quote To a great mind, nothing is little.

To a great mind, nothing is little.

Revenge is good. It's what separates us from the animals and the hippies.

But you can't stop at one, you wanna drink another woman!

I'm better than dirt. Well, most kinds of dirt, not that fancy store-bought dirt... I can't compete with that stuff.

Great simpsons quote Acknowledge all of your small victories. They will eventually add up to somethin

Acknowledge all of your small victories. They will eventually add up to something great.

How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?

I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me, Superman. Homer Simpson

I wish I could be as thin as Jessica Simpson.

I think she looks gorgeous! I have had Jessica on my show several times, and I can tell you that girl is genuine and funny with a great self-deprecating sense of humor.

Great simpsons quote Average people have great ideas. Legends have great execution.

Average people have great ideas. Legends have great execution.

We live in a society of laws. Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Well, I didn't hear anybody laughing, did you?

When a woman says nothing's wrong, that means everything's wrong.

And when a woman says everything's wrong, that means everything's wrong! And when a woman says something's not funny, you'd better not laugh your ass off!

Oh, everything looks bad if you remember it.

Great simpsons quote Don't fear the failure... in great attempts it is glorious even to fail.

Don't fear the failure... in great attempts it is glorious even to fail.

You know, the one with all the well meaning rules that don't work out in real life, uh, Christianity.

And here I am using my own lungs like a sucker.

I'm a Spalding Gray in a Rick Dees world.

Great simpsons quote If an egg is broken by outside, life ends. If broken by inside force, life begin

If an egg is broken by outside, life ends. If broken by inside force, life begins. Great things always begin from inside.

A woman is a lot like a refrigerator. Six feet tall, 300 pounds...it makes ice.

'The Simpsons' appearances were great fun.

But I don't take them too seriously. I think 'The Simpsons' have treated my disability responsibly.

When you're trying to come up with an idea for a movie it's actually the hardest part - the germ of the idea. Inevitably you think of something that would be great and then discover that it was on an episode of The Simpsons.

There are countless times where you're trying to channel somebody who's not there, but that's what you have to do. But Audrey Geisel, who has executive produced this film and Horton, and who works remarkably close with me, is a great source of information. (The Simpsons creator) Matt Groening once told me that one of the most important roles that he fulfills on The Simpsons is being the keeper of the integrity of the original vision.

I have to say that The Simpsons comes from a huge number of great writers headed by Al Jean, the show-runner, and the work that they do is really fantastic. It's a blast just to sit around with them in the writers' room and listen to all the filthy jokes that will never get on the air.

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