I don't think there's anybody in this organization not focused on the 49ers...I mean Chargers.— Bill Belichick
Practical Hilarious Sports quotations
My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.
That's great, tell him he's Pele and get him back on.
When you're rich, you don't write checks. Straight cash, homey.
When you get that nice celebration coming into the dugout and you're getting your ass hammered by guys, there's no better feeling than to have that done.
The only thing that keeps this organization from being recognized as one of the finest in baseball is wins and losses at the major league level.
I spent 90% of my money on women and drink. The rest I wasted
I led the league in go get 'em next time.
I feel like I'm the best, but you're not going to get me to say that.
My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt.
Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject.
I'd run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl.
He's one of the best power forwards of all-time. I take my hands off to him.
I want your heart, I want to eat your children.
To win, I'd run over Joe's mom too.
Therapy can be a good thing; it can be therapeutic.
I don't want to shoot my mouth in my foot, but those are games we can win.
Ray Lewis is the type of guy, if he were in a fight with a bear I wouldn't help him, I'd pour honey on him because he likes to fight. That's the type of guy Ray Lewis is.
Don't say I don't get along with my teammates.
I just don't get along with some of the guys on the team.
Things have been invented because of alcohol.
Like the taser, okay? Yeah! The morning after pill, okay? The reach-around. Judge Judy. What has pot given the world? Hackey sack? YEAH! Hilarious ring tones? OH GAH! Ultimate Frisbee Championships? It sucks to be a champion at a sport that can't get you laid. It's an unneeded skill like, I dunno, being the best banjo player. Or a squirter.