quote by Groucho Marx

If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.

— Groucho Marx

Remarkable wit and humour quotes that are about best humour

Humourous quote There's no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap.

There's no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap.

Truth is not determined by a majority vote.

All humor is rooted in pain.

Humourous quote Humour is also a way of saying something serious.

Humour is also a way of saying something serious.

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'Understanding' art is like having a sense of humour - if you don't have one, no amount of explanation is going to make you laugh.

I suggest taking the high road and have a little sence of humour and let things roll off your back. I think that's very important.

PHRENOLOGY, n. The science of picking the pocket through the scalp. It consists in locating and exploiting the organ that one is a dupe with.

What is done cannot be undone, but one can prevent it happening again

Humour breaks down boundaries, it topples our self-importance, it connects people, and because it engages and entertains, it ultimately enlightens.

In mathematics, if I find a new approach to a problem, another mathematician might claim that he has a better, more elegant solution. In chess, if anybody claims he is better than I, I can checkmate him.

The world belongs to those who set out to conquer it armed with self confidence and good humour.

ARSENIC, n. A kind of cosmetic greatly affected by the ladies, whom it greatly affects in turn.

The most powerful weapon in Chess is to have the next move

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine.

I was in the Square at the time. The crowd was a most good-humoured, easy going, smiling crowd; but presently it was transformed. A regiment of mounted police came cantering up.

Based on what you know about him in history books, what do you think Abraham Lincoln would be doing if he were alive today? 1) Writing his memoirs of the Civil War. 2) Advising the President. 3) Desperately clawing at the inside of his coffin.

In all thy humours, whether grave or mellow, Thou'rt such a touchy, testy, pleasant fellow, Hast so much wit and mirth and spleen about thee, There is no living with thee, nor without thee.

Analysing comedy is like dissecting a frog. Nobody laughs and the frog dies.

But we are living in a sceptical and, if I may use the phrase, a thought-tormented age: and sometimes I fear that this new generation, educated or hyper-educated as it is, will lack those qualities of humanity, of hospitality, of kindly humour which belonged to an older day.

If someone had told me years ago that sharing a sense of humour was so vital to partnerships, I could have avoided a lot of sex!

I like doom and gloom with a sense of humour.

Maybe it's a Scottish thing, we like to undercut indulgence with a laugh.

DIGESTION, n. The conversion of victuals into virtues. When the process is imperfect, vices are evolved instead - a circumstance from which that wicked writer, Dr. Jeremiah Blenn, infers that the ladies are the greater sufferers from dyspepsia.

There's no life without humour. It can make the wonderful moments of life truly glorious, and it can make tragic moments bearable.

Humor is an affirmation of dignity, a declaration of man's superiority to all that befalls him.

I used to think that the brain was the most wonderful organ in my body.

Then I realized who was telling me this.

The establishment will irritate you - pull your beard, flick your face - to make you fight. Because once they've got you violent, then they know how to handle you. The only thing they don't know how to handle is non-violence and humor.

All of us have schnozzles... if not in our faces, then in our character, minds or habits. When we admit our schnozzles, instead of defending them, we begin to laugh, and the world laughs with us.

Surreal humour - Surreal humour (also known as absurdist humour or surreal comedy) is a form of humour predicated on deliberate violations of causal reasoning, producing

Aqueous humour - The aqueous humour is a transparent watery fluid similar to plasma, but containing low protein concentrations. It is secreted from the ciliary epithelium

Toilet humour - Toilet humour or scatological humour (compare scatology) is a type of off-colour humour dealing with defecation, urination and flatulence, and to a lesser

Comedy of humours - The comedy of humours is a genre of dramatic comedy that focuses on a character or range of characters, each of whom exhibits two or more overriding traits

British humour - British humour is shaped by the relative stability[citation needed] of British society and carries a strong element of satire aimed at "the absurdity of

Shock humour - Shock humour is a style of comedy intended to shock the audience. This can be achieved through excessively foul toilet humour, overt sexual themes, mocking

German humour - German humour refers collectively to the conventions of comedy and its cultural meaning within the country of Germany. Comedy is a staple of German culture

Black comedy - ancient Greeks with Aristophanes. The term black humor (from the French humour noir) was coined by the Surrealist theorist André Breton in 1935 while interpreting

Four temperaments - described the four temperaments as part of the ancient medical concept of humourism, that four bodily fluids affect human personality traits and behaviours

I had placed my stick on the table, as I do every evening.

It had been specially made to suit my height, to enable me to walk without too much difficulty. As I was standing up, a customer called to me: 'Monsieur, don't forget your pencil.' It was very unkind, but most funny.

Humour is a great vehicle for getting a message across.

If you get too serious, you could die of starch.

Humour is the weapon of unarmed people: it helps people who are oppressed to smile at the situation that pains them.

Cling tight to your sense of humour. You will need it every day.

I don't think God's going to judge me based on my film work - although I hope he has a sense of humour and I hope he's a fan of movies because I've done some things that may be questionable in his eyes as an actor!

Look! A trickle of water running through some dirt! I'd say our afternoon just got booked solid!

Not enough gets said about the importance of abandoning crap.

The more ignoble I find life, the more strongly I react by contradiction, in humour and in an outburst of liberty and expansion.

K is for "Kenghis Khan"; He was a very nice person. History has no record of him. There is a moral in that, somewhere.

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