Never fight an inanimate object.
— P. J. O'Rourke

The mortality of all inanimate things is terrible to me, but that of books most of all.
William Dean Howells inanimate quote

The goal of all inanimate objects is to resist man and ultimately defeat him.
— Russell Baker

Inanimate objects are classified scientifically into three major categories -- those that don't work, those that break down and those that get lost.
— Russell Baker

I believe in the total depravity of inanimate things... the elusiveness of soap, the knottiness of strings, the transitory nature of buttons, the inclination of suspenders to twist and of hooks to forsake their lawful eyes, and cleave only unto the hairs of their hapless owner's head.
— inanimate quotation by Katharine Walker