Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamp-post what it feels about dogs.
— Christopher Hampton

When writers meet they are truculent, indifferent, or over-polite. Then comes the inevitable moment. A shows B that he has read something of B s. Will B show A? If not, then A hates B, if yes, then all is well. The only other way for writers to meet is to share a quick pee over a common lamp-post.
Cyril Connolly lampposts quote

He used statistics as a drunken man uses lampposts; for support rather than illumination.
— Andrew Lang

Statistics are used much like a drunk uses a lamppost: for support, not illumination.
— Vin Scully

I was the only kid who anybody I knew has ever seen actually walk into a lamppost with his eyes wide open. Everybody assumed that there must be something going on inside, because there sure as hell wasn't anything going on on the outside!
— lampposts quotation by Douglas Adams