Love Funny Quotes

Your mind will always believe everything you tell it. Feed it hope. Feed it truth. Feed it with love.

We’re all a little weird. And life is a little weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness — and call it love — true love.

There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.

The secret to living well and longer is: eat half, walk double, laugh triple and love without measure.

love the life you live. live the life you love.

Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

We were together. I forget the rest.

Everyone comes with baggage. Find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack.

If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.

Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary.

I ain't afraid to love a man. I ain't afraid to shoot him either.

How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.

Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.

A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart, and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words.

Attack the evil that is within yourself, rather than attacking the evil that is in others.

I hope to arrive to my death, late, in love and a little drunk.

Love is just a word, but you bring it definition.

Come grow old with me. The best is yet to be.

Haters are just confused admirers because they can't figure out the reason why everyone loves you.

To love a person is to see all of their magic, and to remind them of it when they have forgotten.

A loving relationship is one in which the loved one is free to be himself -- to laugh with me, but never at me; to cry with me, but never because of me; to love life, to love himself, to love being loved. Such a relationship is based upon freedom and can never grow in a jealous heart

When a woman becomes her own best friend life is easier.

When I was a kid, I said to my father one afternoon, 'Daddy, will you take me to the zoo?' He answered, 'If the zoo wants you, let them come and get you.

Take a lover who looks at you like maybe you are magic.

There is a place you can touch a woman that will drive her crazy. Her heart.

Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person;

having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but to pour them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, knowing that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then, with a breath of kindness, blow the rest away.

I've come to view Jesus much the way I view Elvis.

I love the guy but the fan clubs really freak me out.

To thrive in life you need three bones. A wishbone. A backbone. And a funny bone.

A recipe has no soul. You, as the cook, must bring soul to the recipe.

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.

The solution to any problem -work, love, money, whatever -is to go fishing, and the worse the problem, the longer the trip should be.

Let the beauty of what you love be what you do.

What greater gift than the love of a cat.

Guys are like dogs. They keep comin' back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time, they're gone.

My heart's in the right place. I know, 'cuz I hid it there.

Sometimes the strongest people are the ones who love beyond all faults, cry behind closed doors and fight battles that nobody knows about.

I think men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them.

I am a lover without a lover. I am lovely and lonely and I belong deeply to myself.

I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch.

Two things you will never have to chase: true friends and true love.

Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest.

Don't marry the person you think you can live with;

marry only the individual you think you can't live without.

However good or bad you feel about your relationship, the person you are with at this moment is the "right" person, because he or she is the mirror of who you are inside.

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.

There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends.

I have no notion of loving people by halves, it is not my nature.