quote by John G. Kemeny

The man ignorant of mathematics will be increasingly limited in his grasp of the main forces of civilization.

— John G. Kemeny

Charming Maths Funny quotations

Mathematics is the supreme judge; from its decisions there is no appeal.


Maths funny quote To thrive in life you need three bones. A wishbone. A backbone. And a funny bone
To thrive in life you need three bones. A wishbone. A backbone. And a funny bone.

If equations are trains threading the landscape of numbers, then no train stops at pi.

Maths funny quote Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything
Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything is different.

Obvious is the most dangerous word in mathematics.

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

Know what you're talking about.


Maths funny quote I tried to be normal once. Worst to minutes of my life.
I tried to be normal once. Worst to minutes of my life.
46

Black holes result from God dividing the universe by zero.

What I really need is a woman who loves me for my money but doesn't understand math.

Since the mathematicians have invaded the theory of relativity I do not understand it myself any more.

Maths funny quote Never miss a good chance to shut up.
Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Two wrongs don't make a right.

I never got a pass mark in math... Just imagine - mathematicians now use my prints to illustrate their books. Funny me consorting with all these learned folks, as though I were their long lost brother. I guess they are unaware of the fact that I am ignorant about the whole thing.


Mathematics consists in proving the most obvious thing in the least obvious way.

Maths funny quote Trust me, You can dance.
Trust me, You can dance.
25

No human investigation can be called real science if it cannot be demonstrated mathematically.

Mathematics is not a deductive science - that's a cliché.

.. What you do is trial and error, experimentation, guesswork.

Arithmetic is where numbers fly like pigeons in and out of your head.

Maths funny quote I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

The pursuit of mathematics is a divine madness of the human spirit.


Anyone who cannot cope with mathematics is not fully human.

At best, he is a tolerable subhuman who has learned to wear his shoes, bathe, and not make messes in the house.

Five out of four people have trouble with fractions.

Maths funny quote From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.
From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.

People love to admit they have bad handwriting or that they can't do math.

And they will readily admit to being awkward: 'I'm such a klutz!' But they will never admit to having a poor sense of humor or being a bad driver.

We never know what we are talking about.

It is not the job of mathematicians... to do correct arithmetical operations. It is the job of bank accountants.


Maths funny quote Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.

We need to tap the resource of current and retiring science and math professionals that have both content mastery and the practical experience to serve as effective teachers.

Arithmetic is numbers you squeeze from your head to your hand to your pencil to your paper till you get the answer.

Fifty percent of all doctors graduate in the bottom half of their class - Hope your surgery went well!

Maths funny quote Money can't buy happiness. But it sure can rent it for awhile.
Money can't buy happiness. But it sure can rent it for awhile.

There are two ways to do great mathematics.

The first is to be smarter than everybody else. The second way is to be stupider than everybody else - but persistent.

Mathematics are well and good but Nature keeps dragging us around by the nose.


[A mathematician is a] scientist who can figure out anything except such simple things as squaring the circle and trisecting an angle.

Maths funny quote Let's be pretty kind. Pretty funny. Pretty smart. Pretty strong
Let's be pretty kind. Pretty funny. Pretty smart. Pretty strong

Mathematics - the unshaken Foundation of Sciences, and the plentiful Fountain of Advantage to human affairs.

What is algebra exactly; is it those three-cornered things?

Nixon's motto was, if two wrongs don't make a right, try three.

Maths funny quote Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

But in the new (math) approach, the important thing is to understand what you're doing, rather than to get the right answer.


I was excellent at English and Drama.

Maths and Science I was terrible at. I didn't have any interest in them. I was happiest at lunchtime, playing with my friends. But I love science now, that's the funny thing. And I'd be so good at geography, as I've been fortunate enough to travel the world.

Even stranger things have happened; and perhaps the strangest of all is the marvel that mathematics should be possible to a race akin to the apes.

The mathematics are distinguished by a particular privilege, that is, in the course of ages, they may always advance and can never recede.

Questions are creative acts of intelligence.