quote by Christopher Titus

My dad got divorced six times. Well, he actually only got divorced five times. He wouldn't divorce the sixth one 'cause he said he didn't want people to think he couldn't commit. 'I don't want people not taking me serious.' Dad, your last marriage was performed in Reno by an ordained lesbian Elvis impersonator. Who you hit on.

— Christopher Titus

Strong Reno quotations

When I was a baby, my mama told me son, always be a good boy, don't ever play with guns. But I shot a man in Reno.

Here's a little known fact - Arnold is the first body builder to run for governor since Janet Reno.

What was the more likely cause of the Oklahoma City bombing: talk radio or Bill Clinton and Janet Renos hands-on management of Waco, the Branch Davidian compound?...Obviously, the answer is talk radio. Specifically Rush Limbaughs hate radio....Frankly, Rush, you have that blood on your hands now and you have had it for 15 years.

Mr. Janet Reno? I think Mr. Janet Reno... I think he's one of the best hunting dogs in the world.

The drive to Black Rock City from San Francisco leads through the Nevada flatlands, past the jittering neon sadness of Reno.

People named John and Mary never divorce.

For better or for worse, in madness and in saneness, they seem bound together for eternity by their rudimentary nomenclature. They may loathe and despise one another, quarrel, weep, and commit mayhem, but they are not free to divorce. Tom, Dick, and Harry can go to Reno on a whim, but nothing short of death can separate John and Mary.

In addition, I'm finishing a track for the movie 'Waking Up In Reno', but there are numerous other singers I look forward to recording with in the near future.

Super Troopers is hilarious. Everybody always thought we somehow - we did Reno way, way before any of us had seen Super Troopers. It sat on the shelf for a couple years.

I liked the idea of working with Jean Reno and Mathieu Kassovitz;

there was something logical for me. I thought it was a good thing to do. Actually, The Crimson Rivers movie was a big success, and it was one of the biggest successes I ever had in France.

The unemployment numbers are down to the lowest in 25 years.

... The principle credit goes to Janet Reno, who continued to appoint special prosecutors.

I actually kind of like Janet Reno. She seems like a nice enough lady. But when you're basically going through the entire phone book trying to find women lawyers who don't have maids to pick the attorney general of the United States, how well can you do?

So here they are, the dog-faced soldiers, the regulars, the fifty-cents-a-day professionals riding the outposts of the nation, from Fort Reno to Fort Apache, from Sheridan to Stark. They were all the same. Men in dirty-shirt blue and only a cold page in the history books to mark their passing. But wherever they rode and whatever they fought for, that place became the United States.

I get inspired when I look at Tom Lennon, who did Reno 911! for six seasons while writing huge movies and directing, and also doing other pilots; he did that FX pilot, the Star Trek thing.

In Reno, there is always a bull market, never a bear market, for the stocks and bonds of happiness.

The only place Al Gore conserves energy these days is on the treadmill.

I don't want to suggest that Al's getting big, but the last time I saw him on TV I thought, "That reminds me - we have to do something about saving the polar bears." Never mind his carbon footprint - have you seen the size of Al Gore's regular footprint lately? It's almost as deep as Janet Reno's.

Las Vegas makes Reno seem like your friendly neighborhood grocery store.

[T]he harm [Clinton AG] Reno did to American national security in the fight against terror was incalculable.

If any other religious cult knew so few basic facts about its own seminal beliefs as the liberal cult does about Joe McCarthy, Janet Reno would gas them.

When Congress gets through investigating Attorney General Janet Reno, will her agency become known as the Obstruction of Justice Department? The civil rights movement was one of the great moral crusades in the first half of the twentieth century. Unfortunately, in more recent times it has become all too much like those it opposed, demanding racial double standards and even condoning verbal and violent attacks against members of other races.

We had to sit in this courtroom in Reno for six weeks.

It was like Disneyworld. We had no idea what a subliminal message was - it was just a combination of some weird guitar sounds, and the way I exhaled between lyrics. I had to sing 'Better by You, Better Than Me' in court, a cappella. I think that was when the judge thought, 'What am I doing here? No band goes out of its way to kill its fans'.

Will now allow Reno to claim she is doing a vigorous investigation of campaign financing, when in reality Judicial Watch's public depositions show she is not. Not even John Huang's secretary has been questioned by Justice investigators nor has any other Commerce official. Commerce is at the center of the Clinton Administration's illegal fund-raising. In short, the plea agreements are sadly predictable.

Do you know why Chelsea Clinton is so ugly? Because Janet Reno is her father.

Hussein praised his sons for putting up a brave fight, noting that U.

S. forces had surrounded their compound with advanced weaponry, ground troops and warplanes. In case that didn't work, U.S. forces were prepared to tell Janet Reno that a small Cuban boy was inside the house.

Somebody call Janet Reno - I think I just saw Donato dragging Doug Flutie into a locker room closet!

[T]he Clinton administration launched an attack on people in Texas because those people were religious nuts with guns. Hell, this country was founded by religious nuts with guns. Who does Bill Clinton think stepped ashore on Plymouth Rock? Peace Corps volunteers? Or maybe the people in Texas were attacked because of child abuse. But, if child abuse was the issue, why didn't Janet Reno tear-gas Woody Allen?

Actually I didn't shoot a man in Reno just to watch him die, but he could tell I was extremely cross.

I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die.

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