150 Standup Quotes To Inspire You

Following is our list of standup quotations and slogans full of insightful wisdom and perspective about fall down stand up.

Top 10 Standup Quotes (BEST)

  1. The most memorable performance was my appearance in concert in Carnegie Hall. The first standup to do so. — Shelley Berman
  2. I tell the stories in front of audiences and wait for something to happen. It's similar to a standup comic doing his schtick for an audience. — Robert Munsch
  3. As a standup, I try to change the world. As an entertainer, I try to entertain. And as a lesbian, I try to pick up the prettiest girl in the room. — Lea DeLaria
  4. When you go to standup, there seems to be a common denominator of some form of need or want for validation from the audience that maybe you were lacking as a kid. — Ray Romano
  5. Unquestionably, standup comedy is and has always been an art form. — Shelley Berman
  6. I come to Maui and go surfing, standup paddling, slacklining, swimming, and free-diving. — Julia Mancuso
  7. I do longer runs on things, a lot stories. I really like one-liners, I like a lot of different kinds of standup but I've always been long-winded. — John Mulaney
  8. I follow K-1 closely and also train Ray Sefo. My heart is with K-1 and I love the sport of standup kickboxing. — Shawn Tompkins
  9. The misconception is that standup comics are always on. I don't know any really funny comics that are annoying and constantly trying to be funny all the time. — Joe Rogan
  10. I think that standup has always been an acquired taste and there was always only a handful of performers that were really inspired. — Marc Maron

The Most Famous Standup Quotes

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What is comedy? Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke. — Steve Martin

Sometimes I wonder how I got into comedy at all. — Don Adams

Comedy is defiance. It's a snort of contempt in the face of fear and anxiety. And it's the laughter that allows hope to creep back on the inhale. — Will Durst

It’s the ultimate pinnacle of stand-up to have an hour on HBO, but way more people see Comedy Central and they’ve been good to me. — Daniel Tosh

Women comedy is different than men comedy. Guy comedy is very aggressive, it's about insulting each other, name-calling, and kind of busting each other's chops, and that's not what women's comedy is. — Paul Feig

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt. — Erma Bombeck

Yet there are some people - Steve Allen would dissect comedy forever; he's a really funny guy, but he would love talking about comedy. I'm doing it right now and you all seem bored. — Bob Saget

For me, making the show work was getting belly laughs - like most variety artists. But the straight actor believes you fix your performance in rehearsal and that's it. — Ron Moody

The Internet is a great place to find unconventional comedy that you can't find anywhere else. — Andy Dick

I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately. — George Carlin

Short Standup Quotes

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  • Comedy is difficult, especially slapstick. The trick is to have fun while you are performing it. — Maureen O'Hara
  • As much experience, education and awareness as one can attain is important for a comedian. — Shelley Berman
  • The test of a real comedian is whether you laugh at him before he opens his mouth. — George Jean Nathan
  • Comedy has to be based on truth. You take the truth and you put a little curlicue at the end. — Sid Caesar
  • The secret to humor is surprise. — Aristotle
  • You never heard of a comedy team that didn't fight, did you? — Bud Abbott
  • When I left school I was full of angst, like any teenager, and I channeled it all into comedy. — Matt Lucas

Fall And Stand Up Quotes

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Do not be surprised that you fall every day; do not give up, but stand your ground courageously. And assuredly, the angel who guards you will honour your patience. — John Climacus

If the sky that we look upon should tumble and fall. Or the mountain should crumble to the sea. I won't cry, no I won't shed a tear, just as long as you stand by me. — Ben E. King

Any time we open ourselves up to fear, we fall prey to his deceptions and intimidations. Yet, if we submit our hearts to God and stand in faith, we can resist those first fearful thoughts. As we yield to God we can master our reactions to fear and the enemy will soon flee. — Francis Frangipane

Whatever happens in my life, whether I stand up or I fall down, whatever the case, I'm going to use it in my art. Why? Because I'm an artist and I have to. — Jill Scott

In life you can fall down 1000 times but the point is to have the willingness to stand up and to start again. — Jose Mujica

If you are lying down to give birth, gravity is not helping you. You know, you stand up and, you know, a baby will basically kind of fall out of you, if you keep walking 'round. — Caitlin Moran

Man, you learn so much just like with anything else. If you do something long enough, you learn. You make mistakes. You run into roadblocks and barriers. You overcome obstacles. You fall down. I mean you have to fall down to learn to stand up. — Chuck Ragan

Have four things going. I have stand-up comedy, two television shows and I'm working on a play. I like to work, and I fear that something could fall through. You know what they say: 'The show must go off. — Joy Behar

Spiritual growth is like learning to walk. We stand up, fall, stand up, fall, take a step, fall, take a couple of steps, fall, walk a little better, wobble a bit, fall, run, and finally, eventually fly. — Geri Larkin

When I was a kid my dad would say, "Emo, do you believe in the Lord?" I'd say, "Yes!" He'd say, "Then stand up and shout Hallelujah!" So I would ... and I'd fall out of the roller coaster. — Emo Philips

Fall Down Stand Up Quotes

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One of my favorite Japanese proverbs is "Fall down 7 times, stand up 8". — Georges St-Pierre

we might also call vertigo the intoxication of the weak. aware of his weakness, a man decides to give in rather than stand up to it. he is drunk with weakness, wishes to grow even weaker, wishes to fall down in the middle of the main square in front of everybody, wishes to be down, lower than down. — Milan Kundera

A drunk doesn't try to stand up; a drunk tries not to fall down. — Matthew McConaughey

The people who come out on top in music business have persistence. It is key! Fall down seven times; stand up eight. It takes a lot of courage and an unwavering belief in yourself and your abilities. — Wendy Starland

There are many ways to fall down, but there's only one way to stand up straight. — Gilbert K. Chesterton

All of the heroes you see falling down were filmed trying to stand up. — Mary Ruefle

When things go really really bad - life is going to have its way with you no matter who you are - and when things get really really bad, that's the time to stand up and keep going, and to push, not to fall down or run away. — Kelly Cutrone

Fall down seven times, stand up eight. - Chinese proverbWithout music, life would be a mistake. — Friedrich Nietzsche

Stand-up Quotes

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What my campaign is about is a political revolution - millions of people standing up and saying, enough is enough. Our government belongs to all of us, and not just the hand full of billionaires. — Bernie Sanders

Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen. — Winston Churchill

Learning to stand in somebody else's shoes, to see through their eyes, that's how peace begins. And it's up to you to make that happen. Empathy is a quality of character that can change the world. — Barack Obama

When you trip over love, it is easy to get up. But when you fall in love, it is impossible to stand again. — Albert Einstein

Standup quote

When the people stand up, imperialism trembles. — Thomas Sankara

Develop enough courage so that you can stand up for yourself and then stand up for somebody else. — Maya Angelou

One of the most calming and powerful actions you can do to intervene in a stormy world is to stand up and show your soul. Struggling souls catch light from other souls who are fully lit and willing to show it. — Clarissa Pinkola Estes

Baptists never make love standing up. They're afraid someone might see them and think they're dancing. — Lewis Grizzard

Stand up like a mountain; have faith like a rock; love like an avalanche — Bob Goff

Standup quote

Life will knock us down, but we can choose whether or not to stand back up. — Jackie Chan

Stand Up Comedy Quotes

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I can't imagine being a woman in the world of acting, like where you age starts to weigh you down - you go from being attractive to where they [directors] decided you're out... I feel like with stand-up comedy, it doesn't matter if I've gotten fatter. — Jim Jefferies

I keep my stand-up comedy notes in a pile on my desk. I don't organize my act. I keep myself in a state of confusion. It stresses me out, but I prefer creative chaos. — Joy Behar

I just love entertaining. I will do anything - stand-up comedy, video games, fencing, internet shorts - I just want to keep being lucky enough to entertain people anyway I can. I try never to limit my art to a medium. — Matthew Gray Gubler

I don't do drugs. If I want a rush I just stand up when I'm not expecting it. — Dylan Moran

Stand-up comedy is an art form and it dies unless you expand it. — Sam Kinison

I hate being mean. I watch those roasts on Comedy Central and they make the hair on the back of my neck stand up. — Downtown Julie Brown

I watch a happy person doing stand-up, and I go, "What the hell is this? This person's happy!" You need internal conflict. You need the guy to be out of step with society. It's a tool for comedy. — Zach Galifianakis

When you're standing around for an hour doing stand up it's no big deal but when you're standing around watching a show for an hour - it's a big difference. It's annoying - your feet hurt, your back hurts - it's just not the most comfortable way to see stand-up comedy. — Joe Rogan

I've seen stand up comedy, and after a while you start to notice that a lot of people are doing things that are like a lot of other people. There can be a bit of a herd mentality, and that's obviously less interesting because there's less going on. I'm just being totally frank with you. — Dylan Moran

I better start doing stand up comedy in Spanish before every comedian in Mexico translates my jokes. — Felipe Esparza

Stand Up Comedian Quotes

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The skill of a good actor is to make it always seem like you're in that fantastically spontaneous moment. Very often, a stand-up comedian has a different instinct, which is to reinvent. Once you've laid down some material, and made them laugh, you move on and find some new material. — Colin Firth

Meal isn't over when I'm full. Meal's over when I hate myself. — Patton Oswalt

Jesus was a brilliant Jewish stand-up comedian, a phenomenal improviser. His parables are great one-liners. — Camille Anna Paglia

Jesus was a brilliant Jewish stand-up comedian, a phenomenal improviser. His parables are great one-liners. — Camille Paglia

I think of a lot of comedy being watched alone, for some reason. It's surprising to me that people are getting together to watch stand-up comedy. — Gary Gulman

One of the biggest misconceptions about me is that I'm a comedian, which I'm not. A comedian is someone who can stand up in front of an audience and make you laugh. I've never done stand-up and I never will. I'm a comic actor. My comedy comes through my characters. — Eugene Levy

Laughter is good for you. Nine out of ten stand-up comedians recommend laughter in the face of intense stupidity. — Jim Butcher

I'm a comedian, for God's sake. Viewers shouldn't trust me. And you know what? They're hip enough to know they shouldn't trust me. I'm just doing stand-up comedy. — Dennis Miller

I don't make much distinction between being a stand-up comic and acting Shakespeare - in fact, unless you're a good comedian, you're never going to be able to play Hamlet properly. — Ian Mckellen

When you're in Hollywood and you're a comedian, everybody wants you to do other things. All right, you're a stand-up comedian, can you write us a script? That's not fair. That's like if I worked hard to become a cook, and I'm a really good cook, they'd say, "OK, you're a cook. Can you farm?" — Mitch Hedberg

Stand Up Quotes

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There's a misconception about teamwork. Teamwork is the ability to have different thoughts about things; it's the ability to argue and stand up and say loud and strong what you feel. But in the end, it's also the ability to adjust to what is the best for the team. — Tom Landry

Oppression costs the oppressor too much if the oppressed stands up and protests. The protest need not be merely physical-the throwing of stones and bullets-if it is mental, spiritual; if it expresses itself in silent, persistent dissatisfaction, the cost to the oppressor is terrific. — W. E. B. Du Bois

I sit before flowers hoping they will train me in the art of opening up I stand on mountain tops believing that avalanches will teach me to let go I know nothing but I am here to learn. — Shane Koyczan

As women, we must stand up for ourselves. We must stand up for each other. We must stand up for justice for all. — Michelle Obama

If you live, live free or die like the trees, standing up. — Mahmoud Darwish

May you grow up to be righteous, may you grow up to be true. May you always know the truth and see the lights surrounding you. May you always be courageous, stand upright and be strong. May you stay forever young. — Bob Dylan

I still believe that standing up for the truth of God is the greatest thing in the world. This is the end (purpose) of life. The end of life is not to be happy. The end of life is not to achieve pleasure and avoid pain. The end of life is to do the will of God, come what may. — Martin Luther King, Jr.

When God moves, everybody will be blessed. If something is of the flesh, everybody will have a sick feeling. And if something is of the devil, it seems like the hair will stand up on your neck. That's a simple way everyone can judge, whether they've got any spiritual discernment or not. — Kenneth E. Hagin

Love the earth and sun and animals, Despise riches, give alms to everyone that asks, Stand up for the stupid and crazy, Devote your income and labor to others... And your very flesh shall be a great poem. — Walt Whitman

True strength is not always shown through victory. Stand up, try again and display strength of heart. — Rickson Gracie

Top Stand Up Quotes

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One day I locked my keys in my car and as I was standing there with a hanger halfway through the top of my window, a guy walks up and says, Lock yer keys in the car? Without missin' a beat I said, Nope, Just washed it and was hanging it up to dry. Here's your sign. — Bill Engvall

When you stand up there on top of the world, you become so humble. — Felix Baumgartner

I had no experience with broadcasting basketball games, so I took a tape recorder and went to a playground where there was a summer league, and I stood up in the top of the stands and I called the game. — Ed Bradley

There's no room for failure performing [stand-up] for a black audience. If you don't get them right away it's tough winning them back even if you're doing top-notch material. If you didn't win them right when you walked out there, it's tough. — Hannibal Buress

You know what I'd really like to do the most right now? Climb up to the top of some high place like the pyramids. The highest place I can find. Where you can see forever. Stand on the very top, look all around the world, see all the scenery, and see with my own eyes what's been lost from the world. — Haruki Murakami

When you stand at the bottom of the mountain and look up at the mountaintop, the path looks hard and stony, and the top is obscured by clouds. But when you reach the top and you look down, you realize that there are a thousand paths that could have brought you to that place. — Roz Savage

People sitting on top of the world, usually arrived there standing up. — Unknown

He [Hemingway] used a stand-up work place he had fashioned out of the top of of a bookcase near his bed. His portable typewriter was snugged in there and papers were spread along the top of the bookcase on either side of it. He used a reading board for longhand writing. — A. E. Hotchner

At the beginning of my career, it was very hard to go up. Now, it's very hard to stay on top. You have to stay there, and I want to stay there so badly. I'm still standing. — Gianni Versace

If I'm a racist, why is one of the top civil rights activists of the 1960s asking me to be a centerpiece of the MLK dinner. Why am I the only one who has the guts to stand up to this Democrat Media Complex that insists that black people must exist on the Democrat plantation. — Andrew Breitbart

Comedian Quotes

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To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research. — Steven Wright

Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares?... He's a mile away and you've got his shoes! — Billy Connolly

It's a terrible thing, I think, in life to wait until you're ready. I have this feeling now that actually no one is ever ready to do anything. There is almost no such thing as ready. There is only now. And you may as well do it now. Generally speaking, now is as good a time as any. — Hugh Laurie

When a man carries a gun all the time, the respect he thinks he's getting might really be fear. So I don't carry a gun because I don't want the people of Mayberry to fear a gun. I'd rather they respect me. — Andy Griffith

I've come to view Jesus much the way I view Elvis. I love the guy but the fan clubs really freak me out. — John Fugelsang

I don't think I was awake for much of my childhood. I did a lot of napping. This might have been a defensive measure against encroaching depression. Until about the age of eleven or twelve, I had zero interests other than trying to steal gumballs from supermarket gumball machines. — Michael Ian Black

In the dark times, if you have something to hold on to, which is yourself, you'll survive. — Whoopi Goldberg

Standup quote

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments. — Chris Rock

Standup quote

I have learned from my mistakes, and I am sure I can repeat them exactly — Peter Cook

I was terrified when my doctor told me that I had a unique and interesting personality trait, but then he told me about new Zoloft or Prozac and now I just take three pills a day and I blend right into this horrible inbred corporate landscape. — Doug Stanhope

People Writing About Standup

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Name Quotes Likes
Read quotes by Shelley Berman

Shelley Berman
quotes on education, life and leadership

27 177
Read quotes by Paul Feig

Paul Feig
quotes on life, leadership and ethics

72 143
Read quotes by Bud Abbott

Bud Abbott

10 54
Read quotes by Aristotle

Aristotle
quotes on life, love and success

1252 18854
Read quotes by Sid Caesar

Sid Caesar
quotes on love, life and leadership

16 155
Read quotes by George Jean Nathan

George Jean Nathan
quotes on education, religion and leadership

56 579

More Standup Quotes

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There's this other world where all comedians want to do is make funny videos. Typically what's happened in the past is that a comedian gets a standup career and over the course of 20 years builds it up to the point where Comedy Central gives them a sketch show. — Gavin McInnes

I'm fascinated by mankind. I grew up watching 'Candid Camera' and thought it was funnier than any standup, any joke, anything that could possibly be written because you're dealing with humanity. And people can relate to that. It touches everybody who sees it. It hits a nerve. — Howie Mandel

I only like the live audience. I don't even like to do standup where it's being filmed. Because it affects the way the audience responds to what you say, because it makes them uncomfortable. You have to perform in a light room, and I prefer a dark room. But I love to perform, and I don't really see myself doing any television at all. — Ron White

There are two types of actors. There's the actors who can acknowledge that they could never do standup comedy. Then there's the pretentious ones, who believe that acting is harder than standup comedy. I definitely don't think it is. I also think making a comedy is substantially harder than making a drama. — Jim Jefferies

Kurt (Cobain) was a fan of my standup, which was pretty weird. I know when people hear that, it's kind of like finding out that Jimi Hendrix really liked Buddy Hackett, but he interviewed me at a college radio station before they broke and did Bleach. And then, like, about two years later, I was opening for Nirvana at these huge sports arenas. — Bobcat Goldthwait

I was broke until I was 40. Really broke. I could get by, but I had nothing. No health insurance, so if something happened I was screwed. I was lucky my parents had money and my brother was willing to support me for a long time. Once I started doing standup, I had an income, and that was amazing to me. — Lewis Black

I had a great time on News Radio, I got to make tons of money in relative obscurity and learn a lot about the TV biz and work on my standup act constantly. It was a dream gig. — Joe Rogan

NBC anchor Brian Williams is a standup comic in disguise. — Leonard Maltin

This is my chance to get out there and appease the fans of my music as well as show people that I do do standup comedy because a lot of people don't know that's where I started. — Nick Cannon

Until I started doing standup, there were some very bleak days. — Larry David

I started out with comedy in college, but had my major in Recreation Administration - which meant I wasn't going to get a real job - so I started doing a little standup. — Carlos Alazraqui

I don't want to be a spokesman for family values, but that's the way my standup is perceived. — Ray Romano

I love standup and I haven't given it up. — Ray Romano

I think comedians should focus on what makes them happy, what art form fulfills them the most. Don't be calculated about it and say, 'Okay, I'm gonna tweet, and I'm gonna podcast, and I'm gonna do standup, and one of those things is going to lead me to my own TV show.' I don't think that should be the goal. — Scott Aukerman

I'm really good at standup. I always win at standup. — Leslie Jones

If you like standup and decide that it's overtaking your life and want to hate it, watch 1,000 standup comedians who are trying to get on a TV show. — Adam DeVine

I know now for a fact that improv can't hold a candle to doing standup. It's not the same buzz, it just isn't. It feels infantile to me at times. When you see guys who do it really well, great. But improv needs a rewrite. — Ron James

It [live performance] is just very difficult. Doing an hour, hour and a half of live standup is an endurance test. You almost have to do it every day to stay up on it. — Steve Martin

I just like doing standup, that's all I'm interested in or good at. — Norm MacDonald

I'm not a standup, but I play one on TV. — Ana Gasteyer

I'm not a standup. I don't really have jokes. I don't have 10 minutes. It took a while for me to realize this. — Julia Sweeney

The demand for standup in the eighties was created by how easy it was to exploit 'comedians' and create very cheap television programming. — Marc Maron

It may have lost its special-ness forever and the clubs might not being doing well but I think standup is in the best shape it has been in a long time. — Marc Maron

Hopefully standup will become special again. — Marc Maron

I'd like to go back to standup. I don't like to think I've done my last gig. At the moment it terrifies me, I get really nervous. It's a great buzz when it goes well. — Mackenzie Crook

I will always love to perform standup comedy. — Shelley Berman

If I'm a game show host, will someone buy a ticket to see me do standup? To do a dramatic role in a movie? — Howie Mandel

I do write, I enjoy it. But I like acting. I wanna be in front of the camera as much as I can as long as I can, so I'm still pursuing that. There's just a lot going on. I write standup, so it's just a matter of time. I just need more time! — Rob Riggle

There's a weird loneliness that comes with being a comedian, especially standup. Even with improvisers, I think there are certain moments of truth where you feel really, really connected to audiences, and that's when you're on stage. I think there's definitely something inside the personality of a person who wants to be a comedian that's looking to connect at all times. That's where the adrenaline rushes in their lives come from. — Chris Gethard

When I'm onstage doing standup, no one yells "Cut!" or tells me what to do. I'm DeRay, and I use my own words. With acting, you're portraying a character with someone else's words. Still, you definitely want to inject a little of yourself into every role. — DeRay Davis

Part of standup is being loose and having a good time yourself and that translates to the audience. — John Mulaney

Growing up, I didn't know anything about comedy and didn't know anything about comedians or what standup was. I grew up in the projects with no dream of anything, it was in my formatting when i got older and started talking to my friends about how I felt, they would be like, "dude, that's funny." Then one day my friend was like, "Dude, you don't understand how funny you are, you need to do standup"! — Carlos Mencia

I think stand is better now than it's ever been. I think it's the greatest time ever to do standup comedy. — Joe Rogan

I was just trying to blend the standup that I do almost with like the visual sketch stuff that I did on "Saturday Night Live." And so in terms of how elastic in the world is, we'll see what we can get away with [in John Mulaney show]. — John Mulaney

My standup persona is like I'll heighten things, but I'm observing the world as it is in sort of a heightened emotional state. — John Mulaney

In Conclusion

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