quote by Johnny Carson

Thanksgiving is an emotional holiday. People travel thousands of miles to be with people they only see once a year. And then discover once a year is way too often.

— Johnny Carson

Floundering Thanksgiving Dinner quotations

Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving dinner's sad and thankless.

Christmas dinner's dark and blue. When you stop and try to see it From the turkey's point of view.

May your stuffing be tasty May your turkey plump, May your potatoes and gravy Have nary a lump. May your yams be delicious And your pies take the prize, And may your Thanksgiving dinner Stay off your thighs!

You know that just before that first Thanksgiving dinner there was one wise, old Native American woman saying, Don't feed them. If you feed them, they'll never leave.

‎You cannot correct an old person every time they say something offensive.

You would never make it through Thanksgiving dinner!

Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our thanksgiving," and the words of John Fitzgerald Kennedy tell us that, "As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.

I love Thanksgiving turkey... It's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts.

Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare.

They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.

A two-pound turkey and a fifty-pound cranberry-that's Thanksgiving dinner at Three Mile Island.

A thankful heart is not only the greatest virtue but the parent of all the other virtues.

Spending so much time on the road, I get to fart all the time.

Then when it's, like, Thanksgiving dinner and I'm sitting with my grandmother, I can't fart for, like, two hours.

I love to eat. That's why I got so fat; I love to eat. If I don't walk away from a meal hurting, I didn't do it right. If I don't walk away from Thanksgiving dinner feeling like I've been turkey-f**ked in a gingerbread prison, I didn't do it right.

I believe that one of the most damning things about our culture is the adage to never talk religion and politics. Because we don't model this discourse at the dinner table and at Thanksgiving, we don't know how to do it well and we're not teaching our children about the world and about how to discuss it.

LINUS: Where are you going for Thanksgiving, Charlie Brown? CHARLIE: My father, my mother, Sally, and I are all going to my grandmothers for dinner. SALLY: Do you want to come too, Linus? We can hold hands under the table. LINUS: BLECH!

Prayer is like Thanksgiving dinner. It takes one hour to eat it and ten hours to prepare it.

On Thanksgiving Day, all over America, families sit down to dinner at the same moment -- half- time.

Agriculture is a business that has been up to its bib overalls in politics since the first Thanksgiving dinner kickback to the Indians for subsidizing Pilgrim maize production with fish head fertilizer grants.

Thanksgiving is the most complicated meal you can think of.

Every night, dinner is just pasta. It's just different shapes of pasta.

Thanksgiving is the day you don't know if you're invited for dinner or an intervention either way is going to be an ambush.

I think for Thanksgiving particularly I've always, one of the fun things for me about doing a big dinner is having friends and family so we've always done that, and even through our other holidays like having a mix of friends and family, and if you don't have your family nearby, or it's tough for you, find a friend and go and eat with them.

Well, Thanksgiving we'll all gather at my house for dinner and we usually do Christmas at Beau's house. My mom is still feisty and kicking. She's 92. I saw her last night and she published a book at 90. It's a wonderful book called "You Caught Me Kissing" and it's basically love-poems that she wrote for my dad. It's more than that, it's a wonderful book.

I would love four children because I have a very small family, so I want those big Thanksgiving dinners.

Yesterday, the Supreme Court spent over an hour listening to arguments on whether Obamacare is unconstitutional. Yeah, listening to arguments about Obamacare for an hour, or as most people call that, 'Thanksgiving Dinner.'

The concept of time, as it’s commonly understood by normal people with normal jobs and normal goddamn lives, doesn’t exist on the road. The nights spread out like the dark, godforsaken highways that distinguish them, and the days run together like Thanksgiving dinner smothered in gravy. You never really know where you are or what time it is, and the outside world starts to fade away. It’s cool.

Our family holidays always include our animals.

On Thanksgiving, we love to walk around our farm and visit with our rescued pigs, goats, horses, emus and many other rescued animals. We give them all special vegetables that day, and the whole family enjoys a vegetarian Thanksgiving dinner. We know that the animals are giving thanks that day, and we are also giving thanks for the joy they bring to our lives.

Thanksgiving began in 1621 when Native Americans sat down with a bunch of undocumented pilgrims. They had dinner and the pilgrims never left.

Something I didn't even know was on my bucket list has been achieved.

I have cooked Thanksgiving dinner with Martha Stewart. I vow to follow the gospel of her teachings and do my very best in the remarkably less glamorous kitchen of my own home... without the luxury of magically appearing prep bowls filled by a staff of sous chefs.

Bob wasn't precisely a friend to me but.

.. I was used to him. In a way he was family, the mouthy, annoying, irritable cousin who was always insulting you but who was definitely at Thanksgiving dinner. I had never considered the possibility that one day he might be something else.

Thanksgiving dinner's sad and thankless.

Christmas dinner's dark and blue. When you stop and try to see it From the turkey's point of view. Sunday dinner isn't sunny. Easter feasts are just bad luck. When you see it from the viewpoint of a chicken or a duck. Oh how I once loved tuna salad Pork and lobsters, lamb chops too Till I stopped and looked at dinner From the dinner's point of view.

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