You normally have to be bashed about a bit by life to see the point of daffodils, sunsets and uneventful nice days.

โ€” Alain de Botton

The most wonderful Alain de Botton quotes that are guaranted to improve your brain

Do you love me enough that I may be weak with you? Everyone loves strength, but do you love me for my weakness? That is the real test.

111

The challenge for a human now is to be more interesting to another than his or her smartphone.

102

Intimacy is the capacity to be rather weird with someone - and finding that that's ok with them.

85

There is no such thing as work-life balance. Everything worth fighting for unbalances your life.

85

Sweetness is the opposite of machismo, which is everywhere-and I really don't get on with machismo. I'm interested in sensitivity, and weakness, and fear, and anxiety, because I think that, at the end of the day, behind our masks, that's what we are.

79

One of the better guarantors of ending up in a good relationship: an advanced capacity to be alone.

69

To one's enemies: "I hate myself more than you ever could.

54

Forgiveness requires a sense that bad behaviour is a sign of suffering rather than malice.

51

The happiness that may emerge from taking a second look is central to Proust's therapeutic conception. It reveals the extent to which our dissatisfactions may be the result of failing to look properly at our lives rather than the result of anything inherently deficient about them.

50

A good half of the art of living is resilience.

50

Socrates, on being insulted in the marketplace, asked by a passerby, "Don't you worry about being called names?" retorted, "Why? Do you think I should resent it if an ass had kicked me?

48

We often lose our tempers not with those who are actually to blame;

just with those who love us enough to forgive us our foul moods.

45

About Alain de Botton

Quotes 333 sayings
Nationality English
Profession Writer
Birthday October 16

The largest part of what we call 'personality' is determined by how we've opted to defend ourselves against anxiety and sadness".

36

Most of us still caged within careers chosen for us by our not entirely worldly 18-22 year old selves.

29

The difference between hope and despair is a different way of telling stories from the same facts.

25

Feeling lost, crazy and desperate belongs to a good life as much as optimism, certainty and reason.

23

When you look at the Moon, you think, 'I'm really small.

What are my problems?' It sets things into perspective. We should all look at the Moon a bit more often.

20

A snob is anybody who takes a small part of you and uses that to come to a complete vision of who you are.

19

Being content is perhaps no less easy than playing the violin well: and requires no less practice.

17

Most anger stems from feelings of weakness, sadness and fear: hard to remember when one is at the receiving end of its defiant roar.

17

We need objects to remind us of the commitments we've made.

That carpet from Morocco reminds us of the impulsive, freedom-loving side of ourselves we're in danger of losing touch with. Beautiful furniture gives us something to live up to. All designed objects are propaganda for a way of life.

16

Most of our childhood is stored not in photos, but in certain biscuits, lights of day, smells, textures of carpet.

16

As adults, we try to develop the character traits that would have rescued our parents.

15

Our capacity to draw happiness from aesthetic objects or material goods in fact seems critically dependent on our first satisfying a more important range of emotional or psychological needs, among them the need for understanding, for love, expression and respect.

14

The more familiar two people become, the more the language they speak together departs from that of the ordinary, dictionary-defined discourse. Familiarity creates a new language, an in-house language of intimacy that carries reference to the story the two lovers are weaving together and that cannot be readily understood by others.

14

Mental health: having enough safe places in your mind for your thoughts to settle.

13

Maturity: knowing where you're crazy, trying to warn others of the fact and striving to keep yourself under control.

13

Although I don't believe in God, Bach's music shows me what a love of God must feel like.

12

Work finally begins when the fear of doing nothing exceeds the fear of doing it badly.

11

Must being in love always mean being in pain?

10

There's a whole category of people who miss out by not allowing themselves to be weird enough.

9

Literature deserves its prestige for one reason above all others - because it's a tool to help us live and die with a little bit more wisdom, goodness, and sanity.

9

True love is a lack of desire to check one's smartphone in another's presence.

9

The true nature of bureaucracy may be nowhere more obvious to the observer than in a developing country, for only there will it still be made manifest by the full complement of documents, files, veneered desks and cabinets - which convey the strict and inverse relationship between productivity and paperwork.

8

The blunt large questions become connected to smaller, apparently esoteric ones.

8

Paying tax should be framed as a glorious civic duty worthy of gratitude - not a punishment for making money.

7

The Arab-Israeli conflict is also in many ways a conflict about status: it's a war between two peoples who feel deeply humiliated by the other, who want the other to respect them. Battles over status can be even more intractable than those over land or water or oil.

7

Arguments are like eels: however logical, they may slip from the minds weak grasp unless fixed there by imagery and style.

7

The good parent: someone who doesn't mind, for a time, being hated by their children.

7

Our responses to the world are crucially moulded by the company we keep, for we temper our curiosity to fit in with the expectations of others.

7

Literature deeply stands opposed to the dominant value system-the one that rewards money and power. Writers are on the other side-they make us sympathetic to ideas and feelings that are of deep importance but canโ€™t afford airtime in a commercialized, status-consciou s, and cynical world.

6

It's clear to me that there is no good reason for many philosophy books to sound as complicated as they do.

6

I'm also interested in the modern suggestion that you can have a combination of love and sex in a marriage - which no previous society has ever believed.

6

Intuition is unconscious accumulated experience informing judgement in real time.

6

Let death find us as we are building up our matchstick protests against its waves.

6

There is real danger of a disconnect between what's on your business card and who you are deep inside, and it's not a disconnect that the world is ready to be patient with.

6

Journeys are the midwives of thought.

Few places are more conducive to internal conversations than moving planes, ships or trains.

6

Most of what makes a book 'good' is that we are reading it at the right moment for us.

6

Our homes do not have to offer us permanent occupancy or store our clothes to merit the name. To speak of home in relation to a building is simply to recognise its harmony with our own prized internal song. Home can be an airport or a library, a garden or a motorway diner.

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