What are the best Andy Rooney quotes?

Accurate and famous quotes by Andy Rooney. People, time, think, enough, little are the favorite topics of this American journalist. Read the best of all time and enjoy Top 10 lists, which can be shared with your friends and family.

  1. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

  2. It's paradoxical, that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn't appeal to anyone.

  3. Death is a distant rumor to the young.

  4. Most of us end up with no more than five or six people who remember us. Teachers have thousands of people who remember them for the rest of their lives.

  5. Happiness depends more on how life strikes you than on what happens.

  6. The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.

  7. If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.

  8. Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.

  9. Nothing in fine print is ever good news.

  10. If dogs could talk it would take a lot of the fun out of owning one.

  11. I didn't get old on purpose, it just happened. If you're lucky, it could happen to you.

  12. A writer's job is to tell the truth.

  13. Computers may save time but they sure waste a lot of paper. About 98 percent of everything printed out by a computer is garbage that no one ever reads.

    • computers

  14. My own time is passing fast enough without some national game to help it along.

  15. Taxes are important. President Bush's tax proposals leave no rich person behind. Voters approve of President Bush helping the kind of people they wish they were one of.

  16. Making duplicate copies and computer printouts of things no one wanted even one of in the first place is giving America a new sense of purpose.

  17. Would a real man get caught eating a twinkie?

  18. Figure skating is an unlikely Olympic event but its good television. It's sort of a combination of gymnastics and ballet. A little sexy too which doesn't hurt.

  19. We're all proud of making little mistakes. It gives us the feeling we don't make any big ones.

  20. The Super Bowl isn't for kids, I had a great time though and it was worth every nickel of it because by doing this lame piece about the game I can put it on my expense account.

  21. Let's make a statement to the airlines just to get their attention. We'll pick a week next year and we'll all agree not to go anywhere for seven days.

  22. We need people who can actually do things. We have too many bosses and too few workers.

  23. I just wish we knew a little less about his urethra and a little more about his arms sales to Iran.

  24. I obviously have a knack for getting on paper what a lot of people have thought and didn't realize they thought. And they say, 'Hey, yeah!' And they like that.

  25. I'm in a position of feeling secure enough so that I can say what I think is right and if so many people think it's wrong that I get fired, well, I've got enough to eat.

  26. The dullest Olympic sport is curling, whatever 'curling' means.

  27. As an old reporter, we have a few secrets, and the first thing is we try the phone book.

  28. All men are not created equal but should be treated as though they were under the law.

  29. Don't rule out working with your hands. It does not preclude using your head.

  30. I don't like food that's too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I'd buy a painting.

  31. Obscenities... I think a lot of dumb people do it because they can't think of what they want to say and they're frustrated. A lot of smart people do it to pretend they aren't very smart - want to be just one of the boys.

  32. The closing of a door can bring blessed privacy and comfort -- the opening, terror. Conversely, the closing of a door can be a sad and final thing -- the opening a wonderfully joyous moment.

  33. Writers don't retire. I will always be a writer.

  34. The closing of a door can bring blessed privacy and comfort - the opening, terror. Conversely, the closing of a door can be a sad and final thing - the opening a wonderfully joyous moment.

  35. The only people who say worse things about politicians that reporters do are other politicians.

  36. The world must be filled with unsuccessful musical careers like mine, and it's probably a good thing. We don't need a lot of bad musicians filling the air with unnecessary sounds. Some of the professionals are bad enough.

  37. I don't think the government is out to get me or help someone else get me but it wouldn't surprise me if they were out to sell me something or help someone else sell me something. I mean, why else would the Census Bureau want to know my telephone number?

  38. I like ice hockey, but it's a frustrating game to watch. It's hard to keep your eyes on both the puck and the players and too much time passes between scoring in hockey. There are usually more fights than there are points.

  39. Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize. For all those men who say, Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?, here's an update for you. Nowadays 80%of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

  40. The average bright young man who is drafted hates the whole business because an army always tries to eliminate the individual differences in men.

  41. The federal government has sponsored research that has produced a tomato that is perfect in every respect, except that you can't eat it. We should make every effort to make sure this disease, often referred to as 'progress', doesn't spread.

  42. I hope all of you are going to fill out your census form when it comes in the mail next month. If you don't return the form the area you live in might get less government money and you wouldn't want that to happen, would you.

Top 10 quotes by Andy Rooney

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Andy Rooney image quotes

What are the best Andy Rooney images quotes? Read and bookmark finest sayings from Andy Rooney, embed as quotes on beautiful images. Those images have people quotes, time quotes, think quotes, enough quotes, little quotes.

  1. Picture quote by Andy Rooney about dog

    The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.

  2. Picture quote by Andy Rooney about mess

    One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas Day.

That are top sayings from Andy Rooney as picture quotes. Access more quotations by Andy Rooney with images on Pinterest.

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About Andy Rooney

Name Andy Rooney
About Andrew Aitken "Andy" Rooney was an American radio and television writer. He became most famous as a humorist and commentator with his weekly broadcast
Quotes 42 quotes
Nationality American
Profession Journalist
Birthday October 16
Top topics people, time, think, enough, little

Where is Andy Rooney from? Andy Rooney is American who said awesome wise words. Well-known and respected in American society for wise sayings. The following quotations and images represent the American nature embed in Andy Rooney's character.

What Andy Rooney was famous for? Andy Rooney is famous journalist with many good quotes. Influential and well recognized journalist all over the world. Browse a lot of Andy Rooney books and reference books with quotes from Andy Rooney on Amazon.

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Journalists similar to Andy Rooney

Which journalist has the best quotes? Top quotes from famous journalists like the following.

Andy Rooney favorite topics

Andy Rooney is famous for his passion about people, time, think, enough, little. Check out great quotations and affirmations on these topics.


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When was Andy Rooney birthday? Andy Rooney was born on October 16.

Who is Andy Rooney? Some facts about Andy Rooney from biography. A Few Minutes With Andy Rooney, a part of the CBS news program 60 Minutes from 1978 to 2011.... Read more about Andy Rooney on Wikipedia or watch videos with quotes from Andy Rooney on YouTube. Browse a lot of books about Andy Rooney on Amazon to get more reference.


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