29+ Jackie Gleason Quotes (Comedic, Charismatic And Iconic)

Jackie Gleason was an American comedian, actor, writer, composer and conductor. He was known for his brash visual and verbal comedy style, especially by his character Ralph Kramden on the television series The Honeymooners. He was also known for his film roles in The Hustler, Smokey and the Bandit and The Cannonball Run.

Top 10 Jackie Gleason Quotes

1. One of these days... One of these days... Pow! Right in the kisser!
2. The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it.
3. Thin people are beautiful, but fat people are adorable.
4. Sometimes the feeling that life is great just swells up inside you and fills you with joy.
5. Drinking removes warts and pimples. Not from me. But from those I look at.
6. A lot of people say, 'Well, I like a challenge. 'I don`t like challenges. Life is tough enough without any challenges.
7. Does God have a sense of humor? He must have if He created us.
8. Golf and women are a lot alike. You know you are not going to wind up with anything but grief, but you can't resist the impulse.
9. The only thing better than one of my songs is one of my songs with a glass of scotch.
10. Most wives think of their husbands as bumbling braggarts with whom they happen to be in love.

Jackie Gleason Image Quotes

Thin people are beautiful, but fat people are adorable. — Jackie Gleason

Drinking removes warts and pimples. Not from me. But from those I look at. — Jackie Gleason

Jackie Gleason Short Quotes

• A man must defend his home, his wife, his children, and his martini.
• The Miami Beach audience is the greatest audience in the world!
• Modesty is the artifice of actors, similar to passion in call girls.
• I'm no alcoholic. I'm a drunkard. There's a difference. A drunkard doesn't like to go to meetings.
• I only made $200 a week and I had to buy my own bullets.
• I have no use for humility. I am a fellow with an exceptional talent.
• The worst thing you can do with money is save it.
• The best part of you ran down your mother's legs.
• Modesty in an actor is as fake as passion in a call girl.
• How sweet it is!

Jackie Gleason Famous Quotes And Sayings

Thin people are beautiful, but fat people are adorable. — Jackie Gleason

Our dreams are firsthand creations, rather than residues of waking life. We have the capacity for infinite creativity; at least while dreaming, we partake of the power of the Spirit, the infinite Godhead that creates the cosmos. — Jackie Gleason

Drinking removes warts and pimples. Not from me. But from those I look at. — Jackie Gleason

It is difficult for people to appreciate their own laughter unless you show them some pathos along the way. — Jackie Gleason

I didn't have things as a child, and I was determined to get them. — Jackie Gleason

I knew that nobody could be on television week after week as themselves and exist for any length of time, because no one has that rich a personality.... So I knew that I had to create some characters. — Jackie Gleason

I drink for the honorable purpose of getting bagged. — Jackie Gleason

If you have it and you know you have it, then you have it. If you have it and don't know you have it, you don't have it. If you don't have it but you think you have it, then you have it. — Jackie Gleason

I always knew what I was doing. — Jackie Gleason

Obviously a deer on the fairway has seen you tee off before and knows that the safest place to be when you play is right down the middle. — Jackie Gleason

I have a 'Play The Melody' philosophy. It means don't over arrange, don't make life difficult. Just play the melody-and do it the simplest way possible. — Jackie Gleason

Life Lessons by Jackie Gleason

1. Jackie Gleason taught us that hard work and dedication pay off, as he worked his way up from a struggling comedian to one of the most beloved television stars of all time.
2. He also showed us that it is possible to overcome obstacles and achieve success, as he battled personal and professional struggles throughout his career.
3. Lastly, Gleason's work demonstrated the power of comedy to bring joy to people's lives, as his characters were beloved by audiences for decades.