Jason Segel Quotes

If you can find the line between sympathetic and creepy, you have reached a very funny area.

I was making out with this woman, and my shirt was off, and she leaned over and, in a really cute, girly voice, went, 'Hey, fatty!'

Kermit was the Everyman, the original Tom Hanks, but I have a special place in my heart for Fozzie Bear. The classic borderline hacky entertainer.

There were some super-lean years, yeah.

I'm six feet four. And I entered into this period all of a sudden when I was too big to play a kid and I was too young to play an adult. Like, I couldn't play the lawyer, but I couldn't play the high school kid anymore.

The first time my mom found condoms in my room, she literally started crying hysterically.

You guys own the Muppets, and you're just kind of sitting on 'em.

I really love the Muppets, and I think I know how to bring the franchise back.

A man can certainly be a Muppet. Being a Muppet is a state of mind. It's about finding that little part of you that's unique, and not being embarrassed by it, but cherishing it.

We have reached a very cynical era of comedy.

The Muppets have proven, for 40 years, that you can get laughs without ever doing it at someone else's expense, and I think that that's a really important thing for kids to realize.

People have a lot less leniency for some reason for women straying from a relationship than they do for men.

It [voicing animation] is very freeing.

Nobody in the cast is doing their voice. No one is talking like they normally talk and it's because, all of a sudden, you're freed from the physical limitations of how you look, which is amazing.

I've been 6'4'' since I was 12. Goofy is somewhere in the lexicon.

That's the best advice I can give - when you're trying to write a comedy, first write a drama, and then make it funny.

Fozzie Bear has so many bear puns in this script - like, 'Trac is grizzly!' 'This is unbearable!' It's the greatest.

I've been really lucky to spend some time around actors and artists I really admire. One thing I gathered from asking a lot of questions is that part of this job and this life we've chosen is doing personal exploration in front of an audience. In a lot of ways, that's what art is: personal searching with people watching.

I've just grown a little disappointed with 'Muppets in the Old West', 'Muppets Under Water' and all these weird concept movies. I just want to go take it back to the early 80's, when it was about the Muppets trying to put on a show. That's what I'm trying to bring back.

Our job is to become OK with who we are and what our life has been - and keep enduring.

I sold my first script when I was 21 - this kids' adventure movie that never got made. I just bought that one back, actually. I'm pretty psyched about it.

When you're a kid, Kermit is Tom Hanks.

He's Tom Hanks for kids or Jimmy Stewart for kids. He's truly the every man.

I always have awkward relationships with the ladies for whatever reason.

I don't know and so here we are. I was able to sort of take all of those terrible, terrible, terrible dates and turn them into a money making venture.

I'm better looking in person.

I have always felt like romantic comedies are incredibly predictable.

You look at the poster and you know those two are ending up together at the end of the movie.

Honestly, I have come to believe that everything is in the order it's in for a reason. I am happy with who I am today.

There is a little bit of hubris to want to change the past.

It implies that you know better - that things didn't happen the way that they were supposed to.

I like to be challenged acting wise and I like to do things that I'm scared of.

The whole thing that drew me to doing an animated film is that you're freed from the physical limitations of your physical body. All of a sudden, you get to be something that has nothing to do with the fact that I'm a 6'4", lumbering dude, and that is really exciting.

The narrative of our lives is a total construct.

We get to choose what that is. That is something I've realized as I've gotten older. I have a lot of choices about the story that I'm telling myself about my life. So where do I find meaning?

I have a similar issue with people who hire me as I do with women.

'You have to have a particular taste to want to be around me. I have a slightly askew view.