I have a very varied taste in music. Everything from rap to classical to Latino to Rat Pack to jazz.

— Jasper Fforde

The most interesting Jasper Fforde quotes that are simple and will have a huge impact on you

To espresso or to latte, that is the question.

..whether 'tis tastier on the palate to choose white mocha over plain...or to take a cup to go. Or a mug to stay, or extra cream, or have nothing, and by opposing the endless choice, end one's heartache.

47

After all, reading is arguably a far more creative and imaginative process than writing; when the reader creates emotion in their head, or the colors of the sky during the setting sun, or the smell of a warm summer's breeze on their face, they should reserve as much praise for themselves as they do for the writer - perhaps more.

42

Two minds with but a single thought, two hearts that beat as one.

41

Defiance through compliance.

31

Love is a wonderful thing, my dear, but it leaves you wide open for blackmail.

27

The cucumber and the tomato are both fruit;

the avocado is a nut. To assist with the dietary requirements of vegetarians, on the first Tuesday of the month a chicken is officially a vegetable.

24

Books may look like nothing more than words on a page, but they are actually an infinitely complex imaginotransference technology that translates odd, inky squiggles into pictures inside your head.

23

I collect ex-boyfriends -- and more than five, at last count.

12

How fishy on the fishiness scale? Ten is a stickleback and one is a whale shark.

" "A whale isn't a fish, Thursday." "A whale shark is--sort of." "All right, it's as fishy as a crayfish." "A crayfish isn't a fish." "A starfish, then." "Still not a fish." "This is a very odd conversation, Thursday.

9

A missing arm might ruin your symmetry.

Personal asymmetry where I come from is a big taboo and brings great shame on the family and sometimes even the whole village." "Do you then have to kill yourself over it or something?" "Goodness me, no! The family and village just have to learn to be ashamed--and nuts to them for being so oversensitive.

8

Have you ever wondered how nostalgia isn"t what it used to be?

7

Failure concentrates the mind wonderfully.

If you don't make mistakes, you're not trying hard enough.

6

About Jasper Fforde

Quotes 161 sayings
Profession Novelist
Birthday October 16

Okay, this is the wisdom. First, time spent on reconnaissanse is never wasted. Second, almost anything can be improved with the addition of bacon. And finally, there is no problem on Earth that can't be ameliorated by a hot bath and a cup of tea.

5

Marriage, like spinach and opera, was something I had never thought I would like.

5

Social mores change with time, like fashion - who knows where it might all end up? I especially like the idea that waste, impoliteness and overpopulation become "abominations," although I'm not sure recycling one's aunt will ever truly catch on.

5

I didn't set out to discover a truth.

I was actually sent to the Outer Fringes to conduct a chair census and learn some humility. But the truth inevitably found me, as important truths often do, like a lost thought in need of a mind.

4

For every expert there is an equal and opposite expert.

4

Lesson one in time travel, Thursday. First of all, we are all time travellers. The vast majority of us manage only one day per day.

4

Palindrome as well. My sister's name is Hannah. Father liked word games. He was fourteen times World Scrabble Champion. When he died, we buried him at Queenzieburn to make use of the triple word score.

4

If it weren't for greed, intolerance, hate, passion and murder, you would have no works of art, no great buildings, no medical science, no Mozart, no Van Gough, no Muppets and no Louis Armstrong.

3

Humans like stories. Humans need stories. Stories are good. Stories work. Story clarifies and captures the essence of the human spirit. Story, in all its forms—of life, of love, of knowledge—has traced the upward surge of mankind. And story, you mark my words, will be with the last human to draw breath.

3

Love and magic are like oil and water--they just don't mix.

3

Don't let anyone tell you the future is already written.

The best any prophet can do is to give you the most likely version of future events. It is up to us to accept the future for what it is, or change it. It is easy to go with the flow; it takes a person of singular courage to go against it.

3

How many people want to read about three disreputable pigs and a dopey wolf with a disposition towards house demolition?

3

Quarkbeasts, for all their fearsome looks, are obedient to a fault.

They are nine-tenths velociraptor and kitchen blender and one-tenth Labrador. It was the Labrador tenth that I valued most.

3

Don't move," said Sprockett."Mimes don't generally attack unless they are threatened.

3

Don't ever call me mad, Mycroft. I'm not mad. I'm just ... well, differently moraled, that's all.

3

Without a yardstick sometimes the high points can be taken for granted.

3

Yes, and imagine a world where there were no hypothetical situations.

3

Sometimes, a word succeeds beyond the wildest dreams of its creators, like a virus sent into the world to infect common speech.

3

I'll tell you what love is" I said, "It is blind devotion, unquestioning self humiliation, utter submission, trust and belief against yourself and against the whole world, giving up your heart and soul to the smiter.

2

Do I have to talk to insane people?" "You're a librarian now. I'm afraid it's mandatory.

2

Sorry, [Hamlet] said, rubbing his temples.

I don't know what came over me. All of a sudden I had this overwhelming desire to talk for a very long time without actually doing anything.

1

Religion isn't the cause of wars, it's the excuse.

1

Agents and publishers only want one thing - good writing.

1

For an author just starting out, you've got to deliver the goods every year or sooner or people will forget you or you will lose momentum. There is a contract that exists between author and reader.

0

Comedy was one of those genres that while appearing quite jolly was actually highly dangerous.

0

You speak baby gibberish?' asked Jack.

'Fluently. The adult-education center ran a course, and I have a lot of time on my hands.' 'So what did he say?' 'I don't know.' 'I thought you said you spoke gibberish?' 'I do. But your baby doesn't. I think he's speaking either pre-toddler nonsense, a form of infact burble or an obscure dialect of gobbledygook. In any event, I can't understand a word he's saying.' 'Oh.

0

I also read about Heathcliff's unexpected three-year career in Hollywood under the name Buck Stallion and his eventual return to the pages of Wuthering Heights.

0

A surfeit of information often hides an untruth,” he said, with annoying clarity.

0

Whereas story is processed in the mind in a straightforward manner, poetry bypasses rational thought and goes straight to the limbic system and lights it up like a brushfire. It's the crack cocaine of the literary world.

0

Take no heed of her.... She reads a lot of books.

0

Prejudice is a product of ignorance that hides behind barriers of tradition.

0

If you even think about asking Harry Potter for an autograph, your day ends right now.

0

What’s the opposite of déjà vu, when you see something that hasn’t happened yet?” “I don’t know—avant verrais?

0

He set fire to some potatoes, then cooked some undelivered post in the embers.

" - Dad "Did he now? What a strange fellow. I would have done it the other way around." - Stafford

0

History has rewritten itself so many times I'm not really sure how it was to begin with -- it's a bit like trying to guess the original color of a wall when it's been repainted eight times.

0

So my humor, I'd say, comes from a mixture of lowbrow comedy shows and highbrow theater. It's an interesting mix.

0

If only life were that simple; if one could jump to the good parts and flick through the bad.

0
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