13+ John M. Gottman Quotes On Marriage, Friendship

John M. Gottman is an American psychologist and professor emeritus in psychology at the University of Washington. He is known for his work on marital stability and relationship analysis through scientific direct observations. He is also the author of several books on relationships, including The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work and Why Marriages Succeed or Fail. Following is our collection on famous quotes by John M. Gottman on love, marriage, friendship.

I believe we're going to find that respect and affection are essential to all relationships working and contempt destroys them. — John M. Gottman

In order to get to a healthier and more productive place, we need to give up our fear of conflict, turmoil and resistance. — John M. Gottman

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse predict an ailing marriage: Criticism, Defensiveness, Stonewalling and Contempt. The worst of these is contempt. — John M. Gottman

In a good relationship, people get angry, but in a very different way. The Marriage Masters see a problem a bit like a soccer ball. They kick it around. It's 'our' problem. — John M. Gottman

We move in response to our conversation partner’s face, and our brain also fires as we move those muscles and stirs the passions. Paralyzing the face is idiotic. — John M. Gottman

I liken an affair to the shattering of a Waterford crystal vase. You can glue it back together, but it will never be the same again. — John M. Gottman

Gay and lesbian relationships operate on essentially the same principles as heterosexual relationships — John M. Gottman

Admit when you're wrong. Shut up when you're right. — John M. Gottman

Thus, the critical dimension in understanding whether a marriage will work or not, becomes the extent to which the male can accept the influence of the woman he loves and become socialized in emotional communication. — John M. Gottman

Marriages are much more likely to succeed when the couple experiences a 5 to 1 ratio of positive to negative interactions whereas when the ratio approaches 1 to 1, marriages are more likely to end in divorce. — John M. Gottman

You don't have to be interesting. You have to be interested. — John M. Gottman

When a couple gets to the last stage, one or both partners may have an affair. But an affair is usually a symptom of a dying marriage, not the cause. The end of that marriage could have been predicted long before either spouse strayed. — John M. Gottman

Bid for connection: Each of our daily interactions with another person. — John M. Gottman

Life Lessons by John M. Gottman

1. John M. Gottman's work emphasizes the importance of communication and understanding in relationships, and encourages couples to focus on building trust and connection.
2. Gottman's research also highlights the need for couples to be aware of and manage their own emotions, as well as those of their partner.
3. By recognizing and addressing potential problems early on, Gottman's work encourages couples to build strong, lasting relationships.