I believe we're going to find that respect and affection are essential to all relationships working and contempt destroys them.

— John M. Gottman

The most mind-blowing John M. Gottman quotes that will be huge advantage for your personal development

In order to get to a healthier and more productive place, we need to give up our fear of conflict, turmoil and resistance.

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The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse predict an ailing marriage: Criticism, Defensiveness, Stonewalling and Contempt. The worst of these is contempt.

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In a good relationship, people get angry, but in a very different way.

The Marriage Masters see a problem a bit like a soccer ball. They kick it around. It's 'our' problem.

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We move in response to our conversation partner’s face, and our brain also fires as we move those muscles and stirs the passions. Paralyzing the face is idiotic.

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I liken an affair to the shattering of a Waterford crystal vase.

You can glue it back together, but it will never be the same again.

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Gay and lesbian relationships operate on essentially the same principles as heterosexual relationships

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Admit when you're wrong. Shut up when you're right.

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Thus, the critical dimension in understanding whether a marriage will work or not, becomes the extent to which the male can accept the influence of the woman he loves and become socialized in emotional communication.

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Marriages are much more likely to succeed when the couple experiences a 5 to 1 ratio of positive to negative interactions whereas when the ratio approaches 1 to 1, marriages are more likely to end in divorce.

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You don't have to be interesting. You have to be interested.

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When a couple gets to the last stage, one or both partners may have an affair.

But an affair is usually a symptom of a dying marriage, not the cause. The end of that marriage could have been predicted long before either spouse strayed.

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Bid for connection: Each of our daily interactions with another person.

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About John M. Gottman

Quotes 13 sayings
Profession Professor
Birthday 1942
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