What are the best Ogden Nash quotes?

Accurate and famous quotes by Ogden Nash about marriage, conscience, parenting, parents, regret. Ogden Nash is well-known American poet with many wise quotes. You can read the best of all time and enjoy Top 10 lists. Share the best Ogden Nash sayings with your friends and family.


  1. Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else.


  2. To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up.


  3. The most exciting happiness is the happiness generated by forces beyond your control.


  4. A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of.




  5. Candy, is dandy, but Liquor, is quicker.


  6. Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore,And that's what parents were created for.


  7. If you don't want to work, you have to work to earn enough money so that you won't have to work.


  8. A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.


  9. A little incompatibility is the spice of life, as long as he has income and she is pattable.

    • marriage

  10. One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.


  11. Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.

    • parenting

  12. No matter how deep and dark your pit, how dank your shroud, their heads are heroically unbloody and unbowed.


  13. I claim there ain't Another Saint As great as Valentine.


  14. O misery, misery, mumble and moan!Someone invented the telephone,And interrupted a nation's slumbers,Ringing wrong but similar numbers.


  15. Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.

    • marriage

  16. The cow is of the bovine ilk: One end is moo, the other, milk.


  17. Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave when they think that their children are naive.


  18. Every New Year is the direct descendant, isn't it, of a long line of proven criminals?


  19. Man is a victim of dope in the incurable form of hope.


  20. Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.


  21. I have an idea that the phrase 'weaker sex' was coined by some woman to disarm the man she was preparing to overwhelm.


  22. Too clever is dumb.


  23. Remorse is a violent dyspepsia of the mind.


  24. If you are really Master of your Fate, it shouldn't make any difference to you whether Cleopatra or the Bearded Lady is your mate.

    • marriage

  25. If some confectioners were willingTo let the shape announce the filling,We'd encounter fewer assorted chocs,Bitten into and returned to the box.


  26. There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is to have either a clear conscience or none at all.


  27. Indoors or out, no one relaxes in March, that month of wind and taxes, the wind will presently disappear, the taxes last us all the year.


  28. Progress might have been alright once, but it has gone on too long.


  29. People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.


  30. Professional men, they have no cares; whatever happens, they get theirs.



Top 10 quotes by Ogden Nash

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Ogden Nash image quotes

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About Ogden Nash

Where is Ogden Nash from? Ogden Nash is American who said awesome wise words. Well-known and respected in American society for wise sayings. The following quotations and images represent the American nature embed in Ogden Nash's character.

What Ogden Nash was famous for? Ogden Nash is famous poet with many good quotes. Influential and well recognized poet all over the world. Browse a lot of Ogden Nash books and reference books with quotes from Ogden Nash on Amazon.


What are the best marriage quotes by Ogden Nash?


    To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; whenever you're right, shut up.

    • marriage

    A little incompatibility is the spice of life, as long as he has income and she is pattable.

    • marriage

    Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.

    • marriage

    If you are really Master of your Fate, it shouldn't make any difference to you whether Cleopatra or the Bearded Lady is your mate.

    • marriage

    A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick.

    • marriage

    There is only one thing for a man to do who is married to a woman who enjoys spending money, and that is enjoy earning it.

    • marriage

    Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open.

    • marriage

    To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up.

    • marriage

More marriage quotes or go to table of contents


What are the best conscience quotes by Ogden Nash?


    There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is to have either a clear conscience or none at all.

    • conscience

    I think remorse ought to stop biting the consciences that feed it.

    • conscience

More conscience quotes or go to table of contents


What are the best parenting quotes by Ogden Nash?


    Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore,And that's what parents were created for.

    • parenting

    Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.

    • parenting

More parenting quotes or go to table of contents


What are the best parents quotes by Ogden Nash?


    Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave when they think that their children are naive.

    • children

    Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, and that's what parents were created for.

    • children

More parents quotes or go to table of contents


What are the best regret quotes by Ogden Nash?


    One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.

    • regret

    The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we quit it with regret; we make up our minds every night to leave it early, but we make up our bodies every morning to keep it late.


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More quotes by Ogden Nash

Want some more good quotations by Ogden Nash? Explore the rest of 61 sayings by Ogden Nash.


Here is a pen and here is a pencil, here's a typewriter, here's a stencil, here's a list of today's appointments, and all the flies in all the ointments, the daily woes that a man endures -- take them, George, they're yours!


Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker.


The only people who should really sin are the people who can sin and grin.


Some primal termite knocked on wood;and tasted it, and found it good.That is why your Cousin Mayfell through the parlor floor today.




I would live all my life in nonchalance and insouciance, Were it not for making a living, which is rather a nouciance.

  • life

A husband is a guy who tells you when you've got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick.

  • marriage

How easy for those who do not bulge to not overindulge!


I think remorse ought to stop biting the consciences that feed it.

  • conscience

To keep your marriage brimming, With love in the loving cup, Whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up.

  • marriage

There is only one thing for a man to do who is married to a woman who enjoys spending money, and that is enjoy earning it.

  • marriage

And one of his partners asked Has he vertigo? and the other glanced out and down and said Oh no, only about ten feet more.


I do not like to get the news, because there has never been an era when so many things were going so right for so many of the wrong persons.


Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who cannot sleep with window shut, and a woman who cannot sleep with the window open.

  • marriage

People who have what they want are fond of telling people who haven't what they want that they really don't want it.


Commitments the voters don't know about can't hurt you.


The further through life I drift the more obvious it becomes that I am lacking in thrift.

  • money

Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, and that's what parents were created for.

  • children

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

  • happiness

Your hair may be brushed, but your mind's untidy. You've had about seven hours of sleep since Friday. No wonder you feel that lost sensation. You're sunk from a riot of relaxation.


They take the paper and they read the headlines. So they've heard of unemployment and they've heard of bread-lines. And they philanthropically cure them all by getting up a costume charity ball.


The cow is of the bovine ilk; one end is moo, the other milk.


Whether elected or appointed he considers himself the Lord's anointed, and indeed the ointment lingers on him so thick you can't get your fingers on him.


I don't mind their having a lot of money, and I don't care how they employ it, but I do think that they damn well ought to admit they enjoy it.


The trouble with a kitten is that eventually it becomes a cat.


The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we quit it with regret; we make up our minds every night to leave it early, but we make up our bodies every morning to keep it late.

  • bed

Parsley is gharsley.


Good wine needs no bush, and perhaps products that people really want need no hard-sell or soft-sell TV push. Why not? Look at pot.


I think that I shall never see a billboard lovely as a tree. Perhaps, unless the billboards fall, I'll never see a tree at all.


I think that I shall never seea billboard lovely as a tree.Perhaps, unless the billboards fall,I'll never see a tree at all.


He without benefit of scruplesHis fun and money soon quadruples.


Indoors or out, no one relaxesIn March, that month of wind and taxes,The wind will presently disappear,The taxes last us all year.


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Ogden Nash favorite topics

Ogden Nash is famous for his passion about marriage, conscience, parenting, parents, regret. Check out great quotations and affirmations on these topics.


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When was Ogden Nash birthday? Ogden Nash was born on October 16.

Who is Ogden Nash? Some facts about Ogden Nash from biography. Frederic Ogden Nash was an American poet well known for his light verse. At the time of his death in 1971, the New York Times said his "droll verse with its unconventional rhymes made him the country's best-known producer of humorous poetry".... Read more about Ogden Nash on Wikipedia or watch videos with quotes from Ogden Nash on YouTube. Browse a lot of books about Ogden Nash on Amazon to get more reference.

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