21+ Paul Rudnick Quotes On Ethics, Humorous And Satirical

Paul Rudnick is an American playwright, novelist, and screenwriter. He is best known for his plays I Hate Hamlet, Jeffrey, and The Most Fabulous Story Ever Told. He is also known for his work on the films In & Out, Addams Family Values, and Sister Act. Following is our collection on famous quotes by Paul Rudnick on love, ethics, humorous.

Top 10 Paul Rudnick Quotes

1. Writing is 90% procrastination. It is a matter of doing everything you can to avoid writing, until it is about four in the morning and you reach the point where you have to write.
2. Writing is 90 percent procrastination: reading magazines, eating cereal out of the box, watching infomercials.
3. I believe in a benevolent God not because He created the Grand Canyon or Michelangelo, but because He gave us snacks.
4. Most convicted felons are just people who were not taken to museums or Broadway musicals as children.
5. There is only one blasphemy, and that is the refusal to experience joy.
6. Yes, I shot my wife because I thought she was Bigfoot, but I'm from New Jersey.
7. The only thing I have ever been asked [by a pollster] was the age at which I first indulged in oral sex (which, since it was a Yale Daily News poll, meant kissing).
8. If God didn't want you to have it, He would never have let you see it.
9. Most gay bashers will be wearing what gay people had on four years earlier - only in polyester with a Penney's label.
10. I never got that show - Les Miz. It's about the French guy, right, who steals a loaf of bread, and then he suffers for the rest of his life. For Toast. Get over it!

Paul Rudnick Famous Quotes And Sayings

As a writer, I need an enormous amount of time alone. Writing is 90 percent procrastination: reading magazines, eating cereal out of the box, watching infomercials. It's a matter of doing everything you can to avoid writing, until it is about four in the morning and you reach the point where you have to write. Having anybody watching that or attempting to share it with me would be grisly. — Paul Rudnick

And so I continue in borderline poverty, save for my one indulgence, no, my single absolute necessity: I take cabs. Yes, on occasion, when I wish to see what people with unpleasant skin conditions are wearing, I do take the subway. I have never, I am proud to say, taken the bus, because people who take the bus have given up. — Paul Rudnick

Have you ever been to a picnic? And someone blows up a balloon, and everyone starts tossing it around, and it's always just about to touch the ground, but someone always gets there just in time to tap it back up? That balloon, that's God, the very best in all of us, the kindness, the heavy petting, Funny Girl! ...Evil bores me. It's just one note. It doesn't sing! Oh, of course life sucks! It always will. So why not make the most of it? — Paul Rudnick

Because there’s a clock attached to every beautiful woman. From the second she comes into her own, she begins to decline, because she begins to age. Aging is every beautiful woman’s kryptonite. And so, yes, it’s ridiculous and no, you don’t have much time and of course it’s not fair. Those three statements are the essence of beauty. — Paul Rudnick

I just hate that gay role models are supposed to be just like straight people, as if even straight people are like that. — Paul Rudnick

Whenever I stumble over my own feet, or blurt out a thought that makes no sense at all, or leave the house wearing one pattern too many, I always think, 'It's okay, I'm from New Jersey.' I love New Jersey, because it's not just an all-purpose punch line, but probably a handy legal defense, as in 'Yes, I shot my wife because I thought she was Bigfoot, but I'm from New Jersey.' — Paul Rudnick

I think people who make checklists are the most miserable and alone because they are looking for the perfect Entenmann's that is delicious and has no calories. Please, you want a brunette with a sense of humor, a doctorate and HIV-negative status? Good luck, honey. Love isn't so frequent that you can put conditions on it. — Paul Rudnick

Dysmorphia is when someone looks in the mirror, and sees something else. While I studied my own whatever I was, I decided that maybe everyone has at least a touch of dysmorphia; maybe it's impossible for anyone to ever truly know what they look like. — Paul Rudnick

I was once all by myself in a house on Fire Island. Where I compared the original cast recordings of two different versions of The Wild Party. A helicopter should have descended and taken me away to a gay penal colony. But of course, I was already there. — Paul Rudnick

According to Hollywood logic, none of the actual Titanic passengers was interesting enough, so the writer-director had to invent a Romeo and Juliet-style fictional couple to heat up the catastrophe. This seems a tiny bit like giving Anne Frank a wacky best friend, to perk up that attic. — Paul Rudnick

I love [my parents], but what if I could really talk to them? I mean, what if they had some answers? Or would that just be too weird? — Paul Rudnick

Life Lessons by Paul Rudnick

1. Paul Rudnick's work demonstrates the power of humor to tackle difficult topics, such as gender roles, identity, and sexuality.
2. Through his work, Rudnick encourages us to think critically about the world around us and to challenge the status quo.
3. He also reminds us to be kind to ourselves and to others, and to celebrate our differences.