80+ Penn Jillette Quotes (Magical, Entertaining And Innovative)

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  • Top 10 Penn Jillette Quotes
  • Short Penn Jillette Quotes
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Top 10 Penn Jillette Quotes

  1. Channeling is just bad ventriloquism. You use another voice, but people can see your lips moving.
  2. In music, if you hit a wrong note, people forgive you. In magic when something goes wrong, the entire art is destroyed.
  3. Better to be uneducated than educated by your government.
  4. Behaving morally because of a hope of reward or a fear of punishment is not morality.
  5. God works in mysterious, inefficient, and breathtakingly cruel ways
  6. If you believe that there’s a heaven and hell . . . how much do you have to hate somebody to believe that everlasting life is possible and not tell them that?
  7. Only Atheists have morals, the religious have reward and punishment. That's not morality, that's sucking up.
  8. That whole 99% thing, they are all in the 1% of the world. Every one of them pays a cellphone bill that is the yearly income for a family in much of the rest of the world.
  9. My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them.
  10. As I’m fond of saying, if you want to find utopia, take a sharp right on money and a sharp left on sex and it’s straight ahead.

Penn Jillette Short Quotes

  • How much do you have to hate somebody to not proselytize?
  • Fear is the politicians dance partner.
  • You don't have freedom unless you have the freedom to do stupid self-destructive things.
  • The whole world is pretending the breakthrough is in technology. The bottleneck is really in art.
  • It's fair to say that the Bible contains equal amounts of fact, history, and pizza.
  • This I believe: I believe there is no God.
  • Love and respect all people. Hate and destroy all faith.
  • I've always wanted to make the world a more rational place. I'm still working on it.
  • I love nuts. I'm for nuts. I am nuts.
  • You can't stop insane people from doing insane things with insane laws. That's insane!

Penn Jillette Famous Quotes And Sayings

If every trace of any single religion were wiped out and nothing were passed on, it would never be created exactly that way again. There might be some other nonsense in its place, but not that exact nonsense. If all of science were wiped out, it would still be true and someone would find a way to figure it all out again. — Penn Jillette

Believing there is no God gives me more room for belief in family, people, love, truth, beauty, sex, Jell-O, and all the other things I can prove and that make this life the best life I will ever have. — Penn Jillette

I'm not greedy. I have love, blue skies, rainbows and Hallmark cards and that has to be enough. It has to be enough, but it's everything in the world and everything in the world is plenty for me. It seems just rude to beg the invisible for more. — Penn Jillette

People need to be fed, medicated, educated, clothed, and sheltered, and if we're compassionate we'll help them, but you get no moral credit for forcing other people to do what you think is right. There is great joy in helping people, but no joy in doing it at gunpoint. — Penn Jillette

If entertainment ran grocery stores, we'd NEVER get oil cured olives or blue cheese, it would be JUST Coke. — Penn Jillette

Whereas you have someone like Houdini, who works really, really hard to get really, really famous, and then has actual intellectual ideas that he puts into the culture that stay there. — Penn Jillette

Twelve magicians and two carnies have been shot dead doing the bullet catch. That's cool enough, but every night when we close our show with that trick and the loaded gun gets pointed in my face, it goes so far beyond cool. All I can think is 12 magicians, two carnies. — Penn Jillette

If I go out to dinner with you and you order wine, I leave. I won't be around drugs and alcohol at all. — Penn Jillette

Technology adds nothing to art. Two thousand years ago, I could tell you a story, and at any point during the story I could stop, and ask, 'Now do you want the hero to be kidnapped, or not?' But that would, of course, have ruined the story. Part of the experience of being entertained is sitting back and plugging into someone else's vision. — Penn Jillette

We have to fight for the freedom to be stupid, and smoking is one of the best ways to fight for your freedom, to be just as stupid as you can be. — Penn Jillette

The definition of a stupid thing is something that if you do everything right, you still get hurt. Fire-eating and love are stupid things. — Penn Jillette

The characters and events depicted in the damn bible are fictitious. Any similarity to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. — Penn Jillette

If you've gotten yourself into a situation when Clay Aiken is going to talk about his feelings with you, it's time to kill yourself. — Penn Jillette

You can't believe how pro gay and pro freedom of speech I am. I'm way out beyond anyone on the Left. — Penn Jillette

The purpose of art is to collide the intellectual and visceral together at the highest speed possible. — Penn Jillette

I don't think anything gives your life joy and meaning. I think your life simply has joy and meaning. The love for my children, the love for my parents and the love for my friends is the end in itself. The meaning is life. — Penn Jillette

Believing there's no God stops me from being solipsistic. I can read ideas from all different people from all different cultures. Without God, we can agree on reality, and I can keep learning where I'm wrong. We can all keep adjusting, so we can really communicate. — Penn Jillette

Exploration of space is worth it because humans need to explore. Knowledge is always good, and it's a really cool thing to see. — Penn Jillette

I, my own damn self, am not a Tea Party supporter. I disagree with them on social liberties, our overseas wars, Obama's birthplace, Sarah Palin, and the conspicuous absence of tea at their rallies. — Penn Jillette

Thou shalt not take anything on faith — Penn Jillette

The only difference between Obama and Bush is that Obama is killing more people. — Penn Jillette

I think that I am willing to risk my life in order to have more freedom. — Penn Jillette

The vast majority of the world knows there's no reason to circumcise. Someone should tell the doctors. — Penn Jillette

My whole take on libertarianism is simply that I don't know what's best for other people. — Penn Jillette

I don't travel in circles where people say, 'I have faith, I believe this in my heart and nothing you can say or do can shake my faith.' That's just a long-winded religious way to say 'Shut up.' — Penn Jillette

Hypocrisy is annoying but not evil. Someone who says one thing and does another has doubled their chances of being half right. — Penn Jillette

I mean, if I believed, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that a truck was coming at you, and you didn’t believe that truck was bearing down on you, there is a certain point where I tackle you. And this is more important than that. — Penn Jillette

There are two things that have been true throughout history in big hunks. You can find differences in ten years, but in 50 year hunks, 100 years hunks, you'll find two things to be true. One, the world is always getting better. Two, people always think it's getting worse. — Penn Jillette

Reading the Bible is the fast track to atheism. Reading the Bible means starting at "In the beginning..." and throwing it down with disgust at "...the grace of the lord Jesus be with all. Amen." I'm sure there are lots of religious people who've read the Bible from start to finish and kept their faith, but in my self-selected sample, all the people I know who have done that are atheists. — Penn Jillette

Much better than the feeling of having things is the feeling of having earned things. — Penn Jillette

Make deals with people, not paper. — Penn Jillette

You get no moral credit for forcing other people to do what you think is right. — Penn Jillette

The best way to fight the terrorists is to have the freest country on earth. You should be able to get on an airplane, and people - that will not possibly happen again. — Penn Jillette

A famous monk once said, I don't always know what the right thing to do is, my Lord, but I think the fact that I want to please you pleases you. — Penn Jillette

Two things have always been true about human beings. One, the world is always getting better. Two, the people living at that time think it's getting worse. — Penn Jillette

Every time something really bad happens, people cry out for safety, and the government answers by taking rights away from good people — Penn Jillette

Never ascribe to conspiracy that which can be attributed to ignorance. — Penn Jillette

Read everything and be kind. — Penn Jillette

That's the beauty of the Web: You can roll around in a stranger's obsession without having to smell his or her house. You can amscray whenever you want without being rude. The site gets its "hit" and you know more about our species' diversity. — Penn Jillette

The end never justifies the means because there is no end; there are only means. — Penn Jillette

Everyday is an atheist holiday. — Penn Jillette

Technology is run by sex, because it's very important to people, both technology and sex. — Penn Jillette

If there's something you really want to believe, that's what you should question the most. — Penn Jillette

The only difference between Obama and Bush is that Obama is killing more people. He’s about double the numbers now. Can you imagine if McCain had won and did precisely what Obama has done, with every speech and every political maneuver overseas? There’d be riots in the streets about the people we’re killing. And yet because it’s Obama, and he’s better looking and better at reading the teleprompter, we let him get away with it. — Penn Jillette

Luck is statistics taken personally. — Penn Jillette

If you believe that there’s a heaven and hell and people could be going to hell—or not getting eternal life or whatever—and you think that, well, it’s not really worth telling them this because it would make it socially awkward. . . . How much do you have to hate somebody to not proselytize? How much do you have to hate somebody to believe that everlasting life is possible and not tell them that? — Penn Jillette

I don't believe the majority always knows what's best for everyone. — Penn Jillette

How I was brought up and my imaginary friend means more to me than anything you can ever say or do. — Penn Jillette

One of the strongest feelings you can get in life--one of the most rewarding feelings--is the feeling of an "Aha, I finally understand." — Penn Jillette

Atheism is the absence of religion. We don’t really need atheism. We just need to get rid of religion. — Penn Jillette

If you can just convince the dope people that the gun people are right and the gun people that the dope people are right, we could actually live in a lot more freedom. — Penn Jillette

The fact that the majority wants something good does not give them the right to use force on the minority that don't want to pay for it. If you have to use a gun, it's not really a very good idea. Democracy without respect for individual rights sucks. It's just ganging up on the weird kid, and I'm always the weird kid. — Penn Jillette

You don’t have to be brave or a saint, a martyr, or even very smart to be an atheist. All you have to be able to say is “I don’t know”. — Penn Jillette

Freedom means the right to be stupid. — Penn Jillette

We all have friends we love dearly that couldn't pass for human in a strict Turing test. — Penn Jillette

Believing there is no God means the suffering I've seen in my family and indeed all the suffering in the world isn't caused by any omniscient, omnipresent, omnipotent force that isn't bothered to help or is just testing us, but rather something we all may be able to help others with in the future. No God means the possibility of less suffering in the future. — Penn Jillette

Well, it's not really the right word, but freedom is kind of a hobby with me, and I have disposable income that I'll spend to find out how to get people more of it. — Penn Jillette

So many people say, ‘You know, your taxes aren’t taken by force,’ and that’s foolish. If you don’t pay your taxes and you don’t answer the warrant and you don’t go to court, eventually someone will pull a gun. Eventually someone with a gun will show up. — Penn Jillette

Atheism is a religion like not collecting stamps is a hobby. — Penn Jillette

It seems just rude to beg the invisible for more. — Penn Jillette

Life Lessons by Penn Jillette

  1. Penn Jillette teaches us to be fearless in the pursuit of our dreams and to never give up on our goals.
  2. He also emphasizes the importance of hard work and dedication to achieve success.
  3. Lastly, he shows us that it is possible to achieve success through creativity and innovation, even in the face of adversity.
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