Art and love are the same thing: It’s the process of seeing yourself in things that are not you.

— Chuck Klosterman

The most delicious Chuck Klosterman quotes that may be undiscovered and unusual

The essays are very solipsistic and self-absorbed, I'm totally conscious of that. To me, book writing is fun, and I basically just write about things that are entertaining to myself.

48

It appears that countless women born between the years of 1965 and 1978 are in love with John Cusack. I cannot fathom how he isn't the number-one box office star in America, because every straight girl I know would see her soul to share a milkshake with that motherfucker.

29

Anybody who says they are a good liar obviously is not, because any legitimately savvy liar would always insist they're honest about everything.

20

The villain is the person who knows the most but cares the least.

18

Life is rarely about what happened; it's mostly about what we think happened.

14

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Anyone who claims to be good at lying is obviously bad at lying.

Thus - as a writer myself - I cannot comment on whether or not writers are exceptionally good liars, because whatever I said would actually mean its complete opposite.

14

I don't go to scary movies. I don't like the experience of being scared. I think it's very weird that some people do. Obviously, humans are the only animals that do that. You don't see a wolf walk to the end of a cliff and look over the edge to freak himself out.

12

To me, every interview, even if you love the artist, needs to be somewhat adversarial. Which doesn't mean you need to attack the person, but you do need to look at it like you're trying to get information that has not been written about before.

12

What's kind of happening is the conflict over football might be a class conflict where there is a percentage of people who have no relationship to physicality and a percentage of the populace who still does.

10

It is very easy for me to imagine in 200 years, people looking back at chemotherapy as proof that people of the 20th century were insane and just morons.

10

Without a soundtrack, human interaction is meaningless.

10

Necessity used to be the mother of invention, but then we ran out of things that were necessary. The postmodern mother of invention is desire; we don’t really “need” anything new, so we only create what we want.

9

About Chuck Klosterman

Quotes 215 sayings
Nationality American
Profession Critic
Birthday October 16

Whenever I can’t sleep, I like to lie in the darkness and pretend I’ve been assassinated. I’ve found this is the best way to get comfortable. I imagine I’m in the coffin at my funeral, and people from my past are walking by my corpse and making comments about my demise.

9

Every relationship is fundamentally a power struggle, and the individual in power is whoever likes the other person less.

8

I hate motorcycles. Because if I hit one, even if it's not my fault, if I've done nothing wrong, I'm not charged with manslaughter, he's gonna die, because he's on a motorcycle. So I have to live my life knowing that I killed this guy.

8

The deeper reality is that I’m not sure if what I do is real.

I usually believe that I’m certain about how I feel, but that seems naive. How do we know how we feel?…There is almost certainly a constructed schism between (a) how I feel, and (b) how I think I feel. There’s probably a third level, too—how I want to think I feel.

7

The essays are different because ultimately it's things I'm interested in, and I'm really just writing about myself and using those subjects as a prism.

7

It has always been my belief that people are remembered for the sum of their accomplishments but defined by their singular failure.

7

Observing someone without context amplifies the experience.

The more we know, the less we are able to feel.

6

Booze is the greatest of all equalizers. Rich drunks and poor drunks both pass out the same way.

6

I honestly believe that people of my generation despise authenticity, mostly because they're all so envious of it.

5

There are two ways to look at life. The first view is that nothing stays the same and that nothing is inherently connected, and that the only driving force in anyone's life is entropy. The second is that everything pretty much stays the same (more or less) and that everything is completely connected, even if we don't realize it.

4

I think anyone who's not as good a writer as me is absolutely a hack, and I think anybody who's a slightly better writer than me is brilliant. So of course that makes me a horrible critic when it comes to books, because I can't distance my own experience from what I'm doing.

4

To me, fear of the future means fear of technology.

I have a little bit of that. I still use it, but I kind of see technology as this harmful thing that's so ingrained in my life that it sort of dictates and controls my relationship with it.

4

It is important to have questionable friends you can trust unconditionally.

4

I doubt that pornography has been good for the advancement of society, but I suspect it’s done wonders for the advancement of computer technology.

3

Styx and The Stones may break my bones but 'More than Words' will never hurt me

3

Unless you're Shannon Hoon (of Blind Melon), dying is the only thing that guarantees a rock star will have a legacy that stretches beyond temporary relevance.

3

In the Far East, it's very normal for people to wear masks in flu season.

I don't know if I'd ever do that, though, because I don't like having things on my face.

3

In and of itself, nothing really matters. What matters is that nothing is ever in and of itself.

3

I remember saying things, but I have no idea what was said.

It was generally a friendly conversation.” —Associated Press reporter Jack Sullivan, attempting to recount a 3 A.M. exchange we had at a dinner party and inadvertently describing the past ten years of my life.

3

I look at camping the same way I look at horror movies.

All the years that humans fought to get into caves and into shelters - it almost seems sacrilegious to go outside and sleep without a roof. We work so hard to have these things!

3

I love sports, but I don't like live sporting events, because I don't like sitting in the crowd. I like listening to records, but I don't like going to concerts, because I don't like standing in the crowd. I guess I just don't like being in the crowd itself.

3

The biggest hurdle to writing Fargo Rock City was that I couldn't afford a home computer - I had to get a new job so I could buy a computer. It could all change though. In five years, I could be back at some daily newspaper, which wouldn't be so bad.

3

If you’re the type of person who wants to associate exclusively with those who perfectly mirror your own ethical worldview, you’re reducing significantly the scope of your potential life experience.

3

The strength of your memory dictates the size of your reality

3

Book writing is a little different because, in my case, my editor is a year younger than me and basically has the same sensibility as me.

3

We assume that all statements must be mild inversions of the truth, because it's too weird to imagine people who aren't casually lying, pretty much all the time.

3

What is going to happen in the course of my day that will be an improvement over lying on something very soft, underneath something very warm, wearing only underwear, doing absolutely nothing, all by myself?

3

You're trying to find new ideas in people.

I always think to myself, what question I am least comfortable asking the person? And then I make sure I ask it early in the interview.

2

Punk was perfect for lazy people, because anyone could do it--you didn't even need to know how to play your instrument, assuming you knew how to plug it in. There was really no difference between Sid Vicious and anyone in London who owned a bass.

2

Sometimes I think children are the worst people alive.

And even if they're not- even if some smiling toddler is as pure as Evian- it's only a matter of time.

2

Every one of Joel's important songs--including the happy ones--are ultimately about loneliness. And it's not 'clever lonely' (like Morrissey) or 'interesting lonely' (like Radiohead); it's 'lonely lonely,' like the way it feels when you're being hugged by someone and it somehow makes you sadder.

2

It's possible this whole "Why do Latinos love Morrisey?" question will haunt us forever. Fortunately, Canadian academics are on the case.

2

The Sims is an escapist vehicle for people who want to escape to where they already are, which is why I thought this game was made precisely for me.

2

Americans have become conditioned to believe the world is a gray place without absolutes; this is because we're simultaneously both cowardly and arrogant. We don't know the answers, so we assume they must not exist.

2

When I think about the future, I'm not necessarily arguing it's going to be better or worse. I'm just saying it's going to be different.

2

If you move furniture all day, if you're a construction worker, if you have a job that's real physical, this idea that there is a sport that involves the kind of conventional, traditional view of toughness, you see that still as a positive thing.

1

That's like comparing apples with hermaphroditic ground sloths.

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