110+ Chuck Klosterman Quotes On Friendship, Politics And Writing

Top 10 Chuck Klosterman Quotes (BEST)

  1. Art and love are the same thing: It’s the process of seeing yourself in things that are not you.
  2. The essays are very solipsistic and self-absorbed, I'm totally conscious of that. To me, book writing is fun, and I basically just write about things that are entertaining to myself.
  3. Anybody who says they are a good liar obviously is not, because any legitimately savvy liar would always insist they're honest about everything.
  4. The villain is the person who knows the most but cares the least.
  5. Life is rarely about what happened; it's mostly about what we think happened.
  6. Without a soundtrack, human interaction is meaningless.
  7. It is very easy for me to imagine in 200 years, people looking back at chemotherapy as proof that people of the 20th century were insane and just morons.
  8. Every relationship is fundamentally a power struggle, and the individual in power is whoever likes the other person less.
  9. The essays are different because ultimately it's things I'm interested in, and I'm really just writing about myself and using those subjects as a prism.
  10. It has always been my belief that people are remembered for the sum of their accomplishments but defined by their singular failure.

Chuck Klosterman Short Quotes

Go to table of contents

  • Booze is the greatest of all equalizers. Rich drunks and poor drunks both pass out the same way.
  • It is important to have questionable friends you can trust unconditionally.
  • In and of itself, nothing really matters. What matters is that nothing is ever in and of itself.
  • Styx and The Stones may break my bones but 'More than Words' will never hurt me
  • The strength of your memory dictates the size of your reality
  • That's like comparing apples with hermaphroditic ground sloths.
  • And I spilled gravy on my Carolina sweater, because I am alive.
  • Every generation is more influenced by technology, which is always changing faster.
  • If you can't swim, the idea of being in nine feet of water is terrifying, much less the ocean.
  • I would hate for climate change to be accepted simply because everyone was dying.

Chuck Klosterman Quotes On Love

Go to table of contents

It appears that countless women born between the years of 1965 and 1978 are in love with John Cusack. I cannot fathom how he isn't the number-one box office star in America, because every straight girl I know would see her soul to share a milkshake with that motherfucker. — Chuck Klosterman

To me, every interview, even if you love the artist, needs to be somewhat adversarial. Which doesn't mean you need to attack the person, but you do need to look at it like you're trying to get information that has not been written about before. — Chuck Klosterman

I love sports, but I don't like live sporting events, because I don't like sitting in the crowd. I like listening to records, but I don't like going to concerts, because I don't like standing in the crowd. I guess I just don't like being in the crowd itself. — Chuck Klosterman

It's possible this whole "Why do Latinos love Morrisey?" question will haunt us forever. Fortunately, Canadian academics are on the case. — Chuck Klosterman

In baseball and sex, cliches are usually true: pitching beats hitting, and people always want to be loved by anyone who doesn't seem to care. — Chuck Klosterman

First, you must love yourself. And if you do that convincingly enough, others will love you too much. — Chuck Klosterman

I almost never get lonely. I love being alone. I'm glad I'm married, and I love my wife. But there's never been a situation in my life where my unhappiness was based on loneliness. — Chuck Klosterman

As of right now, I am in love with her, and that love is the biggest problem in my life. — Chuck Klosterman

Let's face it: Sadness and evil are always more believable than happiness and love. When a movie reviewer calls a film "realistic," everyone knows what that means--it means the movie has an unhappy ending. — Chuck Klosterman

The last girl I love will be someone I haven’t even met yet, probably. — Chuck Klosterman

Chuck Klosterman Quotes On Writing

Go to table of contents

The biggest hurdle to writing Fargo Rock City was that I couldn't afford a home computer - I had to get a new job so I could buy a computer. It could all change though. In five years, I could be back at some daily newspaper, which wouldn't be so bad. — Chuck Klosterman

Book writing is a little different because, in my case, my editor is a year younger than me and basically has the same sensibility as me. — Chuck Klosterman

I write pretty fast, probably faster than most people. But I might think about something for six hours, then write it in 20 minutes. So did I write for six hours and 20 minutes, or just 20 minutes? I used to write absolutely every day, except for days when I had to travel or something. — Chuck Klosterman

When you're writing for newspapers you have all these parameters. You can't swear, you have to use short paragraphs, all that. If you stay within those parameters, you have lots of freedom because you're writing for the next day. — Chuck Klosterman

If I basically view criticism as sort of an interesting form of writing about oneself, an interesting form of autobiography, then I don't feel any pressure to have any kind of authoritative, universal voice. That kind of thing has never interested me. — Chuck Klosterman

I feel sorry for people who have to edit me. Which is why book writing is by far the most enjoyable. Really the only thing it's based on is whether it's good or not. No book editor, in my experience, is getting a manuscript and try to rewrite it. — Chuck Klosterman

The amount of response I get, in both a negative and a positive context, is completely related to the amount of books I sell, I think. It seems to have nothing to do with what I'm writing, but what degree of success I'm perceived to have. — Chuck Klosterman

Different critics go to different lengths to disagree with that sentiment, but ultimately, they're the person experiencing this art, and whatever judgment or taste they use is internal, and says more about them than about the record they're writing about. — Chuck Klosterman

Chuck Klosterman Quotes On People

Go to table of contents

I don't go to scary movies. I don't like the experience of being scared. I think it's very weird that some people do. Obviously, humans are the only animals that do that. You don't see a wolf walk to the end of a cliff and look over the edge to freak himself out. — Chuck Klosterman

What's kind of happening is the conflict over football might be a class conflict where there is a percentage of people who have no relationship to physicality and a percentage of the populace who still does. — Chuck Klosterman

Whenever I can’t sleep, I like to lie in the darkness and pretend I’ve been assassinated. I’ve found this is the best way to get comfortable. I imagine I’m in the coffin at my funeral, and people from my past are walking by my corpse and making comments about my demise. — Chuck Klosterman

I honestly believe that people of my generation despise authenticity, mostly because they're all so envious of it. — Chuck Klosterman

In the Far East, it's very normal for people to wear masks in flu season. I don't know if I'd ever do that, though, because I don't like having things on my face. — Chuck Klosterman

We assume that all statements must be mild inversions of the truth, because it's too weird to imagine people who aren't casually lying, pretty much all the time. — Chuck Klosterman

Sometimes I think children are the worst people alive. And even if they're not- even if some smiling toddler is as pure as Evian- it's only a matter of time. — Chuck Klosterman

Punk was perfect for lazy people, because anyone could do it--you didn't even need to know how to play your instrument, assuming you knew how to plug it in. There was really no difference between Sid Vicious and anyone in London who owned a bass. — Chuck Klosterman

The Sims is an escapist vehicle for people who want to escape to where they already are, which is why I thought this game was made precisely for me. — Chuck Klosterman

You're trying to find new ideas in people. I always think to myself, what question I am least comfortable asking the person? And then I make sure I ask it early in the interview. — Chuck Klosterman

Chuck Klosterman Quotes On Book

Go to table of contents

I think anyone who's not as good a writer as me is absolutely a hack, and I think anybody who's a slightly better writer than me is brilliant. So of course that makes me a horrible critic when it comes to books, because I can't distance my own experience from what I'm doing. — Chuck Klosterman

It's just that what's important there is different there than what's important is here. Here, people care that you wrote a book or that you work in the media. — Chuck Klosterman

In Fargo, they say, well, that's a job. How well do you get paid? For example, for this book I was written about in Entertainment Weekly, and it was kind of cool because my mom asked me if Entertainment Weekly was a magazine or a newspaper. — Chuck Klosterman

Chuck Klosterman Quotes On Interview

Go to table of contents

If you're doing an interview, you need conversational tension. After you talk to them, you're not going to have a relationship with them, they're not going to like you, they're not going to be your friend. — Chuck Klosterman

I was fortunate that I was at newspapers for eight years, where I wrote at least five or six stories every week. You get used to interviewing lots of different people about a lot of different things. And they aren't things you know about until you do the story. — Chuck Klosterman

A lot of people have this strategy where if they have a hard question they wait to ask it to the end of the interview because they think the person is going to walk out. But what they have to realize is, is that if the person walks out, they have a pretty successful story. — Chuck Klosterman

Chuck Klosterman Quotes On Person

Go to table of contents

If you’re the type of person who wants to associate exclusively with those who perfectly mirror your own ethical worldview, you’re reducing significantly the scope of your potential life experience. — Chuck Klosterman

We all believe that we are a certain kind of person, but we never know until we do something that proves otherwise, or until we die. — Chuck Klosterman

People can demand someone they've never met be arrested and thrown in jail forever because they know it's never going to happen and they're never going to see this person. — Chuck Klosterman

You can't go into the office and be a jerk. You can't yell at your kids or your wife or your husband for no reason. That makes you a terrible person. — Chuck Klosterman

The message of "The Winner Takes It All" is straightforward: It argues that the concept of relationships ending on mutual terms is an emotional fallacy. One person is inevitably okay and the other is inevitably devastated. — Chuck Klosterman

Who Am I? Or (Perhaps More Accurately) Who Else Could Be Me? — Chuck Klosterman

Chuck Klosterman Famous Quotes And Sayings

Go to table of contents

Anyone who claims to be good at lying is obviously bad at lying. Thus - as a writer myself - I cannot comment on whether or not writers are exceptionally good liars, because whatever I said would actually mean its complete opposite. — Chuck Klosterman

Necessity used to be the mother of invention, but then we ran out of things that were necessary. The postmodern mother of invention is desire; we don’t really “need” anything new, so we only create what we want. — Chuck Klosterman

I hate motorcycles. Because if I hit one, even if it's not my fault, if I've done nothing wrong, I'm not charged with manslaughter, he's gonna die, because he's on a motorcycle. So I have to live my life knowing that I killed this guy. — Chuck Klosterman

The deeper reality is that I’m not sure if what I do is real. I usually believe that I’m certain about how I feel, but that seems naive. How do we know how we feel?…There is almost certainly a constructed schism between (a) how I feel, and (b) how I think I feel. There’s probably a third level, too—how I want to think I feel. — Chuck Klosterman

Observing someone without context amplifies the experience. The more we know, the less we are able to feel. — Chuck Klosterman

Unless you're Shannon Hoon (of Blind Melon), dying is the only thing that guarantees a rock star will have a legacy that stretches beyond temporary relevance. — Chuck Klosterman

There are two ways to look at life. The first view is that nothing stays the same and that nothing is inherently connected, and that the only driving force in anyone's life is entropy. The second is that everything pretty much stays the same (more or less) and that everything is completely connected, even if we don't realize it. — Chuck Klosterman

To me, fear of the future means fear of technology. I have a little bit of that. I still use it, but I kind of see technology as this harmful thing that's so ingrained in my life that it sort of dictates and controls my relationship with it. — Chuck Klosterman

I look at camping the same way I look at horror movies. All the years that humans fought to get into caves and into shelters - it almost seems sacrilegious to go outside and sleep without a roof. We work so hard to have these things! — Chuck Klosterman

I remember saying things, but I have no idea what was said. It was generally a friendly conversation.” —Associated Press reporter Jack Sullivan, attempting to recount a 3 A.M. exchange we had at a dinner party and inadvertently describing the past ten years of my life. — Chuck Klosterman

I doubt that pornography has been good for the advancement of society, but I suspect it’s done wonders for the advancement of computer technology. — Chuck Klosterman

What is going to happen in the course of my day that will be an improvement over lying on something very soft, underneath something very warm, wearing only underwear, doing absolutely nothing, all by myself? — Chuck Klosterman

Every one of Joel's important songs--including the happy ones--are ultimately about loneliness. And it's not 'clever lonely' (like Morrissey) or 'interesting lonely' (like Radiohead); it's 'lonely lonely,' like the way it feels when you're being hugged by someone and it somehow makes you sadder. — Chuck Klosterman

When I think about the future, I'm not necessarily arguing it's going to be better or worse. I'm just saying it's going to be different. — Chuck Klosterman

Americans have become conditioned to believe the world is a gray place without absolutes; this is because we're simultaneously both cowardly and arrogant. We don't know the answers, so we assume they must not exist. — Chuck Klosterman

I think that most technology is positive in the short term, and negative in the long term. I wonder, if somebody looked back at the 20th and 21st centuries a thousand years from now, what their perception of the car would be. Or of television. I wonder if over time, they'll be seen as this thing that drove the culture, but ultimately had more downside than upside. — Chuck Klosterman

If you move furniture all day, if you're a construction worker, if you have a job that's real physical, this idea that there is a sport that involves the kind of conventional, traditional view of toughness, you see that still as a positive thing. — Chuck Klosterman

I am of the opinion, and have been for a long time, that any kind of big technological move is almost always positive in the short term but inevitably somewhat negative in the long term. And I think there are many examples of this in every possible context. — Chuck Klosterman

If you stare long enough at anything, you will start to find similarities. The word “coincidence” exists in order to stop people from seeing meaning where none exists. — Chuck Klosterman

A whole bunch of months passed and I didn't hear anything and then he emailed and asked if I could do a little piece on POD and Queens of the Stone Age. — Chuck Klosterman

What my mom failed to understand was that I didn't even want long hair -- I needed long hair. And my desire for protracted, flowing locks had virtually nothing to do with fashion, nor was it a form of protest against the constructions of mainstream society. My motivation was far more philosophical. I wanted to rock. — Chuck Klosterman

I can tell when I've met a bad journalist when they say, "I've met Madonna," or "I know Marilyn Manson." Because I haven't met anyone I've ever interviewed. I've sat down in the position of an interviewer, and they've sat down in the position of an artist trying to promote a product. We have no relationship. I'm able to ask them questions I'd never be allowed to ask them if we were casual friends. It's a completely constructed kind of situation. — Chuck Klosterman

If I'm around spiders, my fear isn't so much the spider, but my fear is that I'm somewhere rustic and that spiders are crawling around. I must be in the woods. — Chuck Klosterman

It seems as though our ability to change technology happens so quickly, and our ability to evolve as creatures is still very slow. — Chuck Klosterman

Even eternally free people are enslaved by the process of living. — Chuck Klosterman

My mind and gut are never simpatico: Every time I think somebody likes me, she doesn't; every time I think somebody doesn't like me, she does. This has never changed and I'm certain it never will. — Chuck Klosterman

Flying to me isn't scary, it's just incredibly boring. And I guess I have a fear of boredom, so in that regard, I'm afraid to fly. — Chuck Klosterman

The amount of response I get, in both a negative and a positive context, is completely related to the amount of books I sell, I think. It seems to have nothing to do with what I'm writing, but what degree of success I'm perceived to have. It's really weird, especially since I spent so much of my life covering people who are famous. It's interesting to actually have it happen to me on some level. — Chuck Klosterman

In some ways, Halloween is much easier for women. They can just dress as sluts, and it's kind of a costume, if they never do any other time. — Chuck Klosterman

I keep saying the word "weird" over and over again, but it's the only way I can describe it. — Chuck Klosterman

I think this is the kind of thing where we're rapidly moving toward an age where most of the populace will be almost unable to imagine life without an Internet component interlocked with it. — Chuck Klosterman

The falling flakes were random and without purpose; the snow was drunker than she was. — Chuck Klosterman

I love the way music inside a car makes you feel invisible; if you plan the stereo at max volume, it's almost like the other people can't see into your vehicle. It tints your windows, somehow. — Chuck Klosterman

I get enjoyment out of writing, but I get absolutely no enjoyment out of rewriting, so I don't do much of it. The more you work on something, certainly, the better it gets. But there's also a pretty clear law of diminishing returns. It drives me crazy to do readings of my books, because if I read anything I've written in the past, I'd like to almost rewrite everything. — Chuck Klosterman

When given the choice, we’d all rather be happy now … even if that guarantees we’ll all be sad later. — Chuck Klosterman

Prior to the early 20th century, for the totality of humankind's existence if they saw something moving, it meant it was there. If they saw a tiger walking, that meant they were near a live tiger. This was entrenched in our subconscious and our unconscious.Then that drastically changed with film and television. — Chuck Klosterman

No woman will ever satisfy me. I know that now, and I would never try to deny it. But this is actually okay, because I will never satisfy a woman, either. Should I be writing such thoughts? Perhaps not. Perhaps it’s a bad idea. I can definitely foresee a scenario where that first paragraph could come back to haunt me, especially if I somehow became marginally famous. — Chuck Klosterman

We’re all tourists, sort of. Life is tourism, sort of. As far as I’m concerned, the dinosaurs still hold the lease on this godforsaken rock. — Chuck Klosterman

Why don't I like crowds? I suppose the worst possible thing I could say is that I don't like people, and that crowds are just collections of people. That seems like a very nihilistic way to look at the world. — Chuck Klosterman

The only people who think the Internet is a calamity are people whose lives have been hurt by it; the only people who insist the Internet is wonderful are those who need it to give their life meaning. — Chuck Klosterman

When I'm walking around, I'm usually drinking pop, so I can't have a mask on. That's why I couldn't be a surgeon. — Chuck Klosterman

Football allows the intellectual part of my brain to evolve, but it allows the emotional part to remain unchanged. It has a liberal cerebellum and a reactionary heart. And this is all I want from everything, all the time, always. — Chuck Klosterman

Instead, we were given a publication called the Weekly Reader, which was like a newspaper for four-foot illiterates. — Chuck Klosterman

This made her remember why people take up walking: It is because they no longer have anywhere to go. — Chuck Klosterman

The goal of being alive is to figure out what it means to be alive. — Chuck Klosterman

If someone feels negative about the way society or culture seems to be going, what it probably suggests is that it's just moving away from the state that they are comfortable with or used to. It's understandable why someone would feel that way. — Chuck Klosterman

The things he did on purpose were usually no different from the mistakes he made by accident. — Chuck Klosterman

If I had to make a choice between only writing about sports or only writing about music, I would probably write about music. I'm not sure why that is. There seems to be more to write about with music, just because it's more of a splintered thing. There's more subgenres. With sports, it's more objective in a way. — Chuck Klosterman

I cannot imagine the type of sinister fiend who would be against the library. A library essentially says, 'Look, here is some free information that will enrich your life. Read it on your own time. I trust that you will bring it back when you are finished.' It might be the most civilized, forward-thinking institution in America. Perhaps the only one, in fact. — Chuck Klosterman

There was a time in our very recent history when it was “interesting” to be a Star Wars fan. It was sort of like admitting you masturbate twice a day or that your favorite band was They Might Be Giants. Star Wars was something everyone of a certain age secretly loved but never openly recognized — Chuck Klosterman

A homeless man once told me that dancing to rap music is the cultural equivalent of masturbating, and I'd sort of fell the same way about playing John Madden Football immediately after filing my income tax: It's fun, but - somehow - vaguely pathetic. — Chuck Klosterman

There's this belief that some things can be taken seriously in an intellectual way, while some things are only entertainment or only a commodity. Or there's some kind of critical consensus that some things are "good," and some things are garbage, throwaway culture. And I think the difference between them, in a lot of ways, is actually much less than people think. Especially when you get down to how they affect the audience. — Chuck Klosterman

I love music, right? I can't say "I'm only going to listen to a physical medium," because there's a bunch of meaningful records that as a music fan I love that I would've never been able to access. So if I want to be part of something I have to get dragged along with technology. — Chuck Klosterman

Soccer is like punk rock: The product is not necessarily terrible. The problem is the fan base. — Chuck Klosterman

[On political correctness:] Any intended message mattered less than the received message, and every received message could be interpreted in whatever way the receiver wanted. — Chuck Klosterman

Every time I learn the truth about something, I’m disappointed — Chuck Klosterman

This is what being alive feels like, you know? The place doesn't matter. You just live. — Chuck Klosterman

It doesn't matter what you can do if you don't know why you're doing it. — Chuck Klosterman

We all eventually become whatever we pretend to hate. — Chuck Klosterman

I tend to equate sadness with intelligence. — Chuck Klosterman

I grew up on a farm, and we didn't have cable and only limited radio stations, so I wasn't inundated with culture the way people in other parts of the country were. But I was really interested in it. — Chuck Klosterman

What's hard to do is describe why you like something. Because ultimately, the reason things move people is very amorphous. You can be cerebral about things you hate, but most of the things you like tend to be very emotive. — Chuck Klosterman

Internet porn makes everything more reasonable -- once you've realized there is a massive subculture of upwardly mobile people who think it's erotic to see an Asian woman giving a hand job to a javelina, nothing else in the world seems crazy. — Chuck Klosterman

And all I could do while I listened to this dude tell me how punk rock saved his life was think, Wow. Why did my friend waste all that time going to chemotherapy? I guess we should have just played him a bunch of shitty Black Flag records. — Chuck Klosterman

I'm really an alarmist when it comes to epidemics. Swine flu now; when SARS was big, I was all freaked out about that, bird flu. That terrifies me. — Chuck Klosterman

Cars are the most central thing in America, in a lot of ways. They've probably influenced the way we live more than anything else, and yet every really big problem - whether it's the environment or who dictates the international economy because of oil - is all tied to cars. Ultimately, cars are bad for civilization. I don't know if they'll end us. — Chuck Klosterman

Somewhere, at some point, somehow, somebody decided that death equals credibility. — Chuck Klosterman

In New York, people are unhappy on purpose, because unhappiness makes them seem more complex; in Washington DC it just sort of works out that way. — Chuck Klosterman

I think one of the many interesting things about [Donald] Trump is that people in the media did not take him seriously for months. Then, when it was clear he was going to be the nominee, they immediately hit the panic button. I think they overlook the possibility that he could just be a really bad president in the way that presidents are traditionally bad. — Chuck Klosterman

Life Lessons by Chuck Klosterman

Go to table of contents

  1. Chuck Klosterman's work emphasizes the importance of understanding the context of the culture around us in order to make sense of our own lives and the lives of others.
  2. He encourages readers to think critically about the media they consume and to question the motivations of those who create it.
  3. He also encourages readers to explore their own opinions and beliefs, and to think about how they can use them to make meaningful connections with people and the world around them.

In Conclusion

Which quote resonated with you best? Did you enjoy our collection of Chuck Klosterman quotes? Or may be you have a quotation about Chuck Klosterman to suggest. Let us know using our contact form.

About the author

This collection is managed by , with an extensive background in quote curation. They have meticulously gathered, researched, and compiled the quotes featured on this page. Every quote has been diligently cross-verified for its origin, its authenticity, and its potential influence on our readership.

Citation

Feel free to cite and use any of the quotes by Chuck Klosterman. For popular citation styles (APA, Chicago, MLA), go to citation page.

Embed HTML Link

Copy and paste this HTML code in your webpage