45+ Pat Paulsen Quotes On Politics, Education And Constitution

Pat Paulsen was an American comedian, actor, and satirist. He was best known for his appearances on the television show The Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour, where he ran for president several times. He was also known for his deadpan delivery and his satirical songs, such as "The All American Boy". Following is our collection on famous quotes by Pat Paulsen on politics, education, constitution.

Top 10 Pat Paulsen Quotes

1. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself-and possibly teh bogey man.
2. All the problems we face in the United States today can be traced to an unenlightened immigration policy on the part of the American Indian.
3. No Taxes. Let's just tip the government 15% if they do a good job.
4. Assuming either the Left Wing or the Right Wing gained control of the country, it would probably fly around in circles.
5. I am neither left wing nor right wing. I am middle-of-the-bird.
6. Having a comic in the White House will assure stability in foreign relations. The world will continue to respond to foreign initiatives by saying, 'You must be joking.'
7. We have nothing to fear but fear itself...and of course the boogieman.
8. If Iowa is the 'heart' land, what part of the human body is Los Angeles?
9. In America, any boy can grow up to become president. Or, if he never grows up, vice president.
10. If elected, I will win.

Pat Paulsen Short Quotes

• Marijuana should be licensed and kept out of the hands of teenagers. It's too good for them.
• A gun is a necessity. Who knows if you're walking down a street and you spot a moose?
• Why should old people get [Social Security]? They just sit around all day doing nothing.
• I've been on the campaign trail so long, some of my wine has turned to vinegar.
• Will I obliterate national debt? Sure, why not?
• In opposition to sex education: Let the kids today learn it where we did - in the gutter.
• Presidents tend to tinker, you know, and mess everything up.
• I've upped my standards. Now, up yours.
• As I've always said: The future lies ahead.
• We must remember that as the centuries go by, time will pass.

Pat Paulsen Quotes About Politics

I'm often asked why I travel around the country talking politics. Is it for humanitarian reasons, community spirit, or is it for the money, the limousines or the girls? The answers are: no, no, yes yes yes! — Pat Paulsen

Only a cheap politician, greedy for political gain, would try to single out one individual for blame. The fault lies not with the individual but with the system, and that system is Richard Nixon. — Pat Paulsen

Many of you have asked why it's taken me so long to select a running mate. I have no intention of reaching into the political grab bag and grabbing any man to be my running mate. I'm going to reach in and grab a woman! — Pat Paulsen

Pat Paulsen Famous Quotes And Sayings

It is true that all of the current presidential candidates once denied that they had any intention of running. But the fact that I am also a liar, doesn't make me a candidate. — Pat Paulsen

I'd learned some things. I knew you weren't supposed to hold a good wine at the top - the paper bag falls off. — Pat Paulsen

Censorship does not interfere with the constitutional rights of every American to sit alone in a dark room in the nude and cuss. — Pat Paulsen

People come up to me in bars and on street corners and they say to me, 'Hey, Paulsen, have you got any change?' — Pat Paulsen

I admit I do have some drawbacks and limitations as a candidate. Although I am a professional comedian, some of my critics maintain that this is not enough. I cannot deny that I stand before you untested and inexperienced - I only spent two years in television, never as a romantic lead or a song and dance man. — Pat Paulsen

I must choose my words carefully in order to avoid any negative interpretation. Among politicians, this is a tactic known as lying. — Pat Paulsen

The last few years of my life have been a little like a long ride in a Poop de Ville with the bottom down. — Pat Paulsen

I don't need adult supervision. — Pat Paulsen

I like to pour my wines for people. I watch their eyes, I can see what they'll like. Most people say they don't like dry wine because they haven't had a dry wine that's clean and fruity, instead of a big, oaky thing. — Pat Paulsen

You have to understand, I can't do any jokes about Ross Perot, because the last thing I need right now is another credit check. — Pat Paulsen

Wine is something to enjoy. We get sick and tired of people who pick it apart and talk about its 'saucy nuances.' — Pat Paulsen

In conclusion, you can see that there is a place for censors and we only wish that we could tell you where it is. — Pat Paulsen

The Clinton Administration has turned out to be a boon. I knew that he would be wonderful, I just knew it from the beginning. From Arkansas? Shoot. — Pat Paulsen

They said I ignored the drug problem. Well, I gave speeches on drugs, I wrote books on drugs. I did darn near everything on drugs! — Pat Paulsen

I think we should just tip the government if it does a good job. Fifteen percent is the standard tip, isn't it? — Pat Paulsen

Yeah, I'm running for the White House again. Well, it's not a run, really; it's sort of a brisk walk. — Pat Paulsen

Worrying about the future is a thing of the past. I don't think about it. — Pat Paulsen

Why should we tell kidnappers, murderers, and embezzlers their rights? If they don't know their rights, they shouldn't be in the business. — Pat Paulsen

On the issue of inflation, I think I could solve it no matter how much money it took. — Pat Paulsen

Every child has a right to go to high school and end up with a third grade education. — Pat Paulsen

Sex doesn't have to be taught. It's something most of us are born with. — Pat Paulsen

Now that my wine has been served in the White House, why not me? Who could talk to farmers better than I? Somebody even asked me the other day if I had anything in my platform about taxes. 'Hell yes,' I said. 'Great state. But I wouldn't want to live there.' — Pat Paulsen

Life Lessons by Pat Paulsen

1. Pat Paulsen's work teaches us that humor can be used to make a political statement and to call attention to important issues.
2. His satire and wit demonstrate that it is possible to make a difference through comedy.
3. His legacy serves as a reminder that humor can be a powerful tool for creating social change.