110+ Tina Fey Quotes On Work, Funny And Witty
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Top 10 Tina Fey Quotes (BEST)
- Don't waste your energy trying to educate or change opinions... Do your thing and don't care if they like it.
- And I can see Russia from my house.
- In most cases being a good boss means hiring talented people and then getting out of their way.
- I think if you ask any of us here, we all dreamed of ending up on Saturday Night Live. I remember thinking, 'I'll just keep doing this as long as I can get away with it.'
- Tracy: Stop eating people's old french fries, little pigeon. Have some self-respect. Don't you know you can fly?
- I had my hair in a ponytail and looked my trademark exhausted.
- You go through big chunks of time where you're just thinking, 'this is impossible - oh,this is impossible'. And then you just keep going and keep going, and you sort of do the impossible.
- Confidence is 10 percent hard work and 90 percent delusion.
- Whatever the problem, be part of the solution. Don’t just sit around raising questions and pointing out obstacles.
- You can tell how smart people are by what they laugh at.
Tina Fey Short Quotes
- Why are my arms so weak? It's like I did that push-up last year for nothing!
- Ah, babies! They’re more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts.
- Being a mom has made me so tired. And so happy.
- I am going to dedicate myself, full time, to my day-drinking.
- I am constantly amazed by Tina Fey. And I am Tina Fey.
- Whenever you see me, I'm on antique quaaludes.
- Just say yes and you'll figure it out afterwards.
- You're not in competition with other women. You're in competition with everyone.
- Politics and prostitution have to be the only jobs where inexperience is considered a virtue.
- Quentin Tarantino is here, star of all my sexual nightmares.
Tina Fey Quotes On Work
It is less dangerous to draw a cartoon of Allah French-kissing Uncle Sam — which, let me make it very clear, I have not done — than it is to speak honestly about [working moms]. — Tina Fey
I had to get back to work... NBC has me under contract; the baby and I only have a verbal agreement. — Tina Fey
Most of the time you're too busy to think about it. But every now and then you say, 'I work at "Saturday Night Live," and that is so cool. — Tina Fey
If you watch [The] Search for Signs of Intelligent Life [in the Universe], or The Incredible Shrinking Woman, or 9 to 5, there is a lot of gender politics at the forefront of Lily Tomlin work, which was kind of thrilling for me to be watching as a 10-, 11-, 12-year-old kid. — Tina Fey
Sometimes, you can feel or see how a movie can... how you can do it. Sometimes it's just like seeing, "Can that work? Will people buy that? Can we do that?" And all those checkmarks. — Tina Fey
Some people work with a trainer, some people work with a stylist. I work with a celebrity fecalist. A fecalist is basically a person who comes and collects my stools, and then examines them to see if I'm eating right and if I should be drinking more water and what my moods should be. — Tina Fey
I don't know how many more movies I'm going to get the opportunity to make and I don't want to look back and go: "Man, I just floated through that one." Or: "I did that one for the money." I want to be able to say that I worked as a hard as I could and I did the best work that I could do. — Tina Fey
Most of my work is done before we start shooting, preparation work, so my normal day begins when I start writing, it might even be the night before. — Tina Fey
The ideal situation for a parent is one that no one has - having a fulfilling job that requires you to work three days a week. It's better for the parents, because they get to spend time with the children and also have a source of pride and achievement - and income - outside the home. — Tina Fey
It doesn't matter if it's a school play or a dumb TV show. It's your work. You should care about it so much that people get annoyed with you. — Tina Fey
Tina Fey Quotes On Funny
Don’t waste your energy trying to educate or change opinions; go over, under, through, and opinions will change organically when you’re the boss. Or they won’t. Who cares? Do your thing, and don’t care if they like it. — Tina Fey
In a study, scientists report that drinking beer can be good for the liver. I'm sorry, did I say 'scientists'? I meant Irish people. — Tina Fey
In an interview, Paris Hilton said that of her and her sister, "People love to hate us. But when you know us, you love us. And if you really get to know us, you get gonorrhea." — Tina Fey
Obviously, as an adult I realize this girl-on-girl sabotage is the third worst kind of female behavior, right behind saying "like" all the time and leaving your baby in a dumpster. — Tina Fey
According to a new study, women in satisfying marriages are less likely to develop cardiovascular diseases than unmarried women. So don't worry, lonely women, you'll be dead soon. — Tina Fey
You can’t be that kid standing at the top of the waterslide, overthinking it. You have to go down the chute. — Tina Fey
It was reported that the New York Knicks have won all 12 of the home games attended by magician David Blaine. A spokesman for the Knicks said, 'if this is what it takes to win, it's not worth it.' — Tina Fey
At the request of the Catholic Church, a three-day sex orgy to be held near Rio de Janeiro was cancelled last Friday. So instead I spent the weekend cleaning my apartment. — Tina Fey
When a man plays a woman in a dress, you're halfway there. It's inherently funny. When a woman plays a man, for whatever reason, it's not that instant kind of funny. — Tina Fey
You mostly know that you want to be funny, know that you have the desire. It's not like people who grow up beautiful and can look in the mirror and be like, I'm beautiful! Funny is more of a journey. And a desperate attempt. — Tina Fey
Tina Fey Quotes On Witty
If you retain nothing else, always remember the most important Rule of Beauty. “Who cares?” — Tina Fey
Do your thing and don't care if they like it. — Tina Fey
To say I’m an overrated troll, when you have never even seen me guard a bridge, is patently unfair. — Tina Fey
(My proudest moment as a child was the time I beat my uncle Pierre at Scrabble with the seven-letter word FARTING.) — Tina Fey
It is an impressively arrogant move to conclude that just because you don’t like something, it is empirically not good. I don’t like Chinese food, but I don’t write articles trying to prove it doesn’t exist. — Tina Fey
My ability to turn good news into anxiety is rivaled only by my ability to turn anxiety into chin acne. — Tina Fey
Lesson learned? When people say, "You really, really must" do something, it means you don't really have to. No one ever says, "You really, really must deliver the baby during labor." When it's true, it doesn't need to be said. — Tina Fey
You must not look in that mirror at your doughy legs and flat feet, for today is about dreams and illusions, and unfiltered natural daylight is the enemy of dreams. — Tina Fey
Gay people don’t actually try to convert people. That’s Jehovah’s Witnesses you’re thinking of. — Tina Fey
Whitney Houston’s cover of “I Will Always Love You” was constantly on my FM Walkman radio around that time. I think that made me cry because I associated it with absolutely no one. — Tina Fey
Tina Fey Quotes On Life
We should leave people alone about their weight. Being chubby for a while (provided you don’t give yourself diabetes) is a natural phase of life and nothing to be ashamed of. Like puberty or slowly turning into a Republican. — Tina Fey
In real life these women experienced different sides of the same sexism coin. People who didn't like Hillary called her a ballbuster. People who didn't like Sarah called her Caribou Barbie. People attempted to marginalize these women based on their gender. — Tina Fey
Life is improvisation. — Tina Fey
The upsides of acting in things is mostly getting your hair done and having people give you clothes. So as long as you can have a little bit of that in your life, then it's just as delightful to be behind camera. — Tina Fey
A new study suggests that middle-aged adults who go on periodic drinking binges may face a heightened risk of dementia later on in life. The study is entitled, 'National Strategy for Victory in Iraq.' — Tina Fey
When I turned 50, I looked in the mirror and I thought: "Hey, this isn't the dress rehearsal, this is life and I don't know how much longer I'm going to have!" — Tina Fey
Sometimes you want to have a very productive Saturday to feel that you are in control of your life, which of course you are not. — Tina Fey
Mary Tyler Moore was a working woman whose story lines were not always about dating and men. They were about work friendships and relationships, which is what I feel my adult life has mostly been about. — Tina Fey
I had to face the fact that I had been using my gay friends as props. They were always supposed to be funny and entertain me and praise me and listen to my problems, and their life was supposed to be a secret that no one wanted to hear about. I wanted them to stay in the “half closet. — Tina Fey
...I can't possibly take time off for a second baby, unless I do, in which case that is nobody's business and I'll never regret it for a moment unless it ruins my life. — Tina Fey
Tina Fey Quotes On School
A Harvard Medical School study has determined that rectal thermometers are still the best way to tell a baby's temperature. Plus, it really teaches the baby who's boss. — Tina Fey
I was the editor of the school newspaper and in drama club and choir, so I was not a popular girl in the traditional sense, but I think I was known for being relatively scathing. — Tina Fey
Pissing in jars, they had never been handed a fifteen-year-old Kotex product by the school nurse. But they trusted me and Paula, so I'm proud to say we made — Tina Fey
In Washington, officials from the National Rifle Association met with a group of high school students. There were no survivors. — Tina Fey
Tina Fey Famous Quotes And Sayings
George Clooney married Amal Alamuddin this year. Amal is a human rights lawyer who worked on the Enron case, was an advisor to Kofi Annan regarding Syria, and was selected for a three-person commission investigating rules of war violation in the Gaza Strip. So tonight, her husband is getting a lifetime achievement award. — Tina Fey
That turned-up collar. The jacket that zipped all the way down the front into a nice fitted shape. The white denim that made my untanned skin look like a color. — Tina Fey
The same ten minutes that magazines urge me to use for sit-ups and triceps dips, I used for sobbing. — Tina Fey
I feel about Photoshop the way some people feel about abortion. It is appalling and a tragic reflection on the moral decay of our society…unless I need it, in which case, everybody be cool. — Tina Fey
In response to the escalating violence in Iraq, President Bush is delaying the return home of 25,000 troops and will actually add reinforcements to the south. Then in a symbolic gesture he pulled down the mission accomplished banner, put on a flight suit, walked backwards to a jet fighter and flew it in reverse off an aircraft carrier. — Tina Fey
Maternity leave is over for Tina Fey of Saturday Night Live. She'll be back behind the Weekend Update anchor desk for this week's episode, her first show since giving birth to daughter Alice on Sept. 10. I had to get back to work, .. NBC has me under contract; the baby and I have only a verbal agreement. — Tina Fey
I don't really have a nemesis, but I have a series of hundreds of small enemies that fuel me. Everyone I meet I assume is out to get me and that fuels my fire on a daily basis. — Tina Fey
To me YES, AND means don't be afraid to contribute. Always make sure you're adding something to the discussion. Your initiations are worthwhile. — Tina Fey
I was wearing my best Gap turtleneck and my dates were two adult lesbians, so yea, I was pretty cool. — Tina Fey
It’s the same reason I don’t get Hooters. Why do we need to enjoy chicken wings and boobies at the same time? Yes, they are a natural and beautiful part of the human experience. And so are boobies. But why at the same time? — Tina Fey
Let's review the cost-free techniques that we've learned so far for raising an achievement-oriented, obedient, drug-free, virgin adult: Calamity, Praise, Local Theater, and flat feet. Another key element is "Strong Father Figure / Fear Thereof." — Tina Fey
MAKE STATEMENTS also applies to us women: Speak in statements instead of apologetic questions. No one wants to go to a doctor who says, “I’m going to be your surgeon? I’m here to talk to you about your procedure? I was first in my class at Johns Hopkins, so?” Make statements, with your actions and your voice. — Tina Fey
It's a great lesson about not being too precious about your writing. You have to try your hardest to be at the top of your game and improve every joke you can until the last possible second, and then you have to let it go. You can't be that kid standing at the top of the waterslide, overthinking it...You have to let people see what you wrote. — Tina Fey
This is what I tell young women who ask me for career advice. People are going to try to trick you. To make you feel that you are in competition with one another. You're up for a promotion. If they go for a woman, it'll be between you and Barbara. Don't be fooled. You're not in competition with other women. You're in competition with everyone. — Tina Fey
North Korea referred to The Interview as absolutely intolerable and a wanton act of terror. Even more amazing: not the worst review the movie got. — Tina Fey
I hope for his sake that Tracy's apology will be accepted as sincere by his gay and lesbian coworkers at 30 Rock, without whom Tracy would not have lines to say, clothes to wear, sets to stand on, scene partners to act with, or a printed-out paycheck from accounting to put in his pocket. — Tina Fey
Somewhere around the fifth or seventh grade I figured out that I could ingratiate myself to people by making them laugh. Essentially, I was just trying to make them like me. But after a while it became part of my identity. — Tina Fey
Politics and prostitution have to be the only jobs where inexperience is considered a virtue. In what other profession would you brag about not knowing stuff? “I’m not one of those fancy Harvard heart surgeons. I’m just an unlicensed plumber with a dream and I’d like to cut your chest open.” The crowd cheers. — Tina Fey
I think women dress for other women to let them know what their deal is. Because if women were only dressing for men, there would be nothing but Victoria's Secret. There would be no Dior. — Tina Fey
I feel like there is a lot of inherent humor in the stress and insanity surrounding that process. People lose their minds, trying to prove their parental worth by getting their children into one of five colleges; when there are thousands of good colleges across the United States - and elsewhere. — Tina Fey
Many of the world's greatest discoveries have been by accident. I mean, look at the Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, or Botox. — Tina Fey
You all have got to stop calling each other sluts and whores. It only makes it okay for guys to call you sluts and whores. — Tina Fey
An interim government was set up in Afghanistan. It included two women, one of whom was Minister of Women's Affairs. Man, who'd she have to show here ankles to to get that job? — Tina Fey
If you want to make an audience laugh, you dress a man up like an old lady and push her down the stairs. If you want to make comedy writers laugh, you push an actual old lady down the stairs. — Tina Fey
The person closest to actually achieving this look is Kim Kardashian, who, as we know, was made by Russian scientists to sabotage our athletes. Everyone else is struggling. — Tina Fey
Yeah, it's tough being smart and sexy, too. I have to say, I'm really not that attractive. Until I met my husband, I could not get a date. I promise you it's true. My husband Jeff Richmond saw a diamond in the rough and took me in. — Tina Fey
I have to say, I'm really not that attractive. Until I met my husband, I could not get a date. — Tina Fey
I have a suspicion that the definition of "crazy" in show business is a woman who keeps talking even after no one wants to f*** [sleep with her] anymore. — Tina Fey
I would not trade any of these features for anybody else’s. I wouldn’t trade the small thin-lipped mouth that makes me resemble my nephew. I wouldn’t even trade the acne scar on my right cheek, because that recurring zit spent more time with me in college than any boy ever did. — Tina Fey
I was ten. I had noticed something was weird earlier in the day, but I knew from commercials that one's menstrual period was a blue liquid that you poured like laundry detergent onto maxi pads to test their absorbency. This wasn't blue, so... I ignored it for a few hours. — Tina Fey
It will never be perfect, but perfect is overrated. Perfect is boring on live TV. — Tina Fey
I have no affinity for animals. I don’t hate animals and I would never hurt an animal; I just don’t actively care about them. When a coworker shows me cute pictures of her dog, I struggle to respond correctly, like an autistic person who has been taught to recognize human emotions from flash cards. In short, I am the worst. — Tina Fey
Seriously, I've just realized that almost everyone is a fraud, so I try not to feel too bad about it. — Tina Fey
There are so many quiet times you spend as a mother that aren't glorified but are a foundation for your kids. No matter what, there was always a thick safety net under this trapeze. — Tina Fey
I prefer the retro chic of spending Christmas just like Joseph and Mary did - Traveling arduously back to the place of your birth to be counted, with no guarantee of a bed when you get there. — Tina Fey
A wise friend once told me, 'Don't wear what fashion designers tell you to wear. Wear what they wear.' — Tina Fey
Only in comedy, by the way, does an obedient white girl from the suburbs count as diversity. — Tina Fey
An acting teacher once told me, 'Greet everything with yes... Even if you abandon one idea for another one, saying yes allows you to move forward.' — Tina Fey
Sleep when your baby sleeps. Everyone knows this classic tip, but I say why stop there? Scream when your baby screams. Take Benadryl when your baby takes Benadryl. And walk around pantless when your baby walks around pantless. — Tina Fey
It has been said that to write is to live forever. The man who said that is dead. — Tina Fey
A recent study announced that 52 per cent of all teens who sign virginity pledges recant them within twelve months. If I'm on my game. — Tina Fey
For most women, the success of conservative women is good for all of us, unless you believe in evolution. Actually, I take it back. The whole thing is a disaster. — Tina Fey
I don't live the single life and never really did. — Tina Fey
I went to the University of Virginia and I came from, I grew up in suburban Philadelphia. — Tina Fey
We writers dream of a future where actors are mostly computer generated and their performances can be adjusted, by us, on a laptop, alone. — Tina Fey
I had a gentleman in college tell me, during a date, that I could be really pretty if I lost some weight. On a date! — Tina Fey
Anyone who knows me will tell you that I am all about money. I mean, just look how well my line of zodiac-inspired toe rings and homeopathic children's medications are selling on Home Shopping Network. — Tina Fey
I don't like my feet. I'm not crazy about anybody's feet. But I have flat feet. — Tina Fey
"Admission" is Paul Weitz's movie. This is Karen Croner - the screenwriter's - movie. To have such a lovely role in such a beautifully written script offered to me, it's like elves made the shoes. — Tina Fey
I'm such a fan of Lily's [Tomlin], for so many years. I feel like Lily was the first popular mainstream crossover comedian who also was kind of an overtly feminist comedian. — Tina Fey
My parents are very well-behaved. If anything, if my Mom were here right now, she would hug and kiss every one of you hello, and then she would feed you. — Tina Fey
I definitely think of myself still as a writer first, and feel like - with the lucky exception of this - any acting opportunity I've gotten is usually because I was writing on it. This is like a wonderful vacation. If you've ever sat in a writers' room it's the most disgusting, tortuous place, so it's a treat to be treated like a movie actor. — Tina Fey
You all watched a sketch about feminism and you didn't even know it because of all the jokes. It's like when Jessica Seinfeld puts spinach in kids' brownies. Suckers! — Tina Fey
Your initiations are worthwhile. — Tina Fey
Never tell a crazy person he’s crazy. — Tina Fey
My parents raised me that you never ask people about their reproductive plans. “You don’t know their situation,” my mom would say. I considered it such an impolite question that for years I didn’t even ask myself. Thirty-five turned into forty faster than McDonald’s food turns into cold nonfood. — Tina Fey
I want to go to there. — Tina Fey
It's like being a little kid again, parading around in a nightgown tucked into your underpants, believing it looks terrific. — Tina Fey
It’s no more dangerous to society than a radio broadcast of The War of the Worlds. — Tina Fey
I'm married, you know. I love my husband and I have a child. — Tina Fey
Life Lessons by Tina Fey
- Tina Fey's work demonstrates the importance of hard work and dedication in achieving success. She has also shown that it is possible to be successful while still being true to yourself and your values.
- Fey has also shown that it is possible to use comedy to address important issues and to challenge the status quo.
- Finally, Fey has demonstrated that it is possible to create a successful career while still maintaining a healthy work-life balance.
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