Now here's a funky introduction of how nice I am Tell your mother, tell your father, send a telegram.

— Phife Dawg

Profound Telegram quotations

A dream is a telegram from the hidden world...Only a fool or an illiterate person ignores it.

Fax me a fact, and I'll telegram a hologram.

The American father is never seen in London.

He passes his life entirely in Wall Street and communicates with his family once a month by means of a telegram in cipher.

Sir Alec Douglas-Home, when he was British Foreign Secretary, said he received the following telegram from an irate citizen: "To hell with you. Offensive letter follows."

I once sent a dozen of my friends a telegram saying 'flee at once - all is discovered.' They all left town immediately.

Without the letters of condolence, telegrams of congratulations and even occasional postcards, the friendship of a separated friend is not a social reality. It has no existence without the rites of friendship. Social rituals create a reality which would be nothing without them.

I have such a horror of telegrams that ask me how I am!! I always want to reply dead.

How to drive a guy crazy: send him a telegram and on the top put 'page 2.'

Am reserving two tickets for you for my premiere.

Come and bring a friend - if you have one. Telegram inviting Winston Churchill to opening night of Pygmalion. Churchill wired back: Impossible to be present for the first performance. Will attend the second - if there is one.

Maman died today. Or yesterday maybe, I don't know. I got a telegram from the home: 'Mother deceased. Funeral tomorrow. Faithfully yours.' That doesn't mean anything. Maybe it was yesterday.

It's true that heroes are inspiring, but mustn't they also do some rescuing if they are to be worthy of their name? Would Wonder Woman matter if she only sent commiserating telegrams to the distressed?

When an actor has money he doesn't send letters, he sends telegrams.

For an Italian peasant a telegram from anywhere is a wondrous thing;

and a cable from the terrestrial paradise of America is not lightly to be disregarded.

Fax me a fact and I'll telegram a hologram or telephone the son of man and tell him he is done. Leave a message on his answering machine telling him there are none. God and I are one. Times moon. Times star. Times sun. The factor is me. You remember me.

After that, we had a short conversation about how your body can sometimes seem totally separate. She said her body can feel like a distant bureaucracy controlled by telegrams from her brain, and I said my body is sometimes like that of Mario Mario, being controlled with a Nintendo joypad. Mario's surname is Mario.

It's a coffee cup." She could hear the irritation in her own voice. "I know it's a coffee cup." "I can't wait till you draw something really complicated, like the Brooklyn Bridge or a lobster. You'll probably send me a singing telegram.

I thought my chances to make the Braves were better and that they were being fairer to me, paying me more money to play in a lower classification ... Besides, the Giants spelled my name "Arron" on their telegram.

Well, I know that I'll never forget that, but also I won't forget the hundreds of people who sent me letters, telegrams, and postcards during that World Series. There wasn't a single nasty message. Everybody tried to say something nice.

When an actor has money, he doesn't send letters, but telegrams.

A man never feels more important than when he receives a telegram containing more than ten words.

I foresee the day when we shall read nothing but telegrams and prayers.

It is important that people support prisoners of the Italian state like Joe in whatever way they can. I was not allowed contact with a lawyer for the first 24 hours, and no phone calls were permitted, but apparently telegrams have been getting through to Joe.

With cinema, one of the great lies dating back to its origin was "It's just entertainment! It doesn't make any impact" Like the great Samuel Goldwyn said, "If you've got a message, send a telegram."

In the First World War, people would be receiving letters from loved ones who had been dead for weeks, and they would not know until that black-bordered telegram arrived. I remember, of course, when it was letters only, or the telephone, and you did not make expensive long-distance calls unless it was, "Come home to the funeral," or the like.

I came upon a telegram from Eleanor Roosevelt herself to Gypsy Rose Lee that read, 'May your bare ass always be shining'. That was the clincher; I had to write about this woman.

The headline is the most important element in most advertisements.

It is the telegram which decides the reader whether to read the copy.

Many years ago, a large American shoe company sent two sales reps to different parts of the Australian outback. A while later, the company received a telegram from each. The first said, 'No business here - the natives don't wear shoes.' The second said, 'Great opportunity here - the natives don't wear shoes.'

This telegram is a work of art if I say it is.

The National Security Agency’s capability at any time could be turned around on the American people, and no American would have any privacy left, such is the capability to monitor everything: telephone conversations, telegrams, it doesn’t matter. There would be no place to hide. If a dictator ever took over, the N.S.A. could enable it to impose total tyranny, and there would be no way to fight back.

The wisdom that living brings, since I got a telegram from the God of simple things.

Comfort his family with a telegram, we regret to inform you we lost a man, but we gave him the highest medal of the land.

Gather up your telegrams Your faded pictures, best laid plans Books and postcards, 45's Every sunset in the sky Carry with you maps and string, flashlights Friends who make you sing And stars to help you find your place Music, hope and amazing grace Maybe what we leave Is nothing but a tangled little mystery Maybe what we take Is nothing that has ever had a name

If you will notice, there is seldom a telegram in a paper which fails to show up one or more members & beneficiaries of our Civilization as promenading with his shirt-tail up & the rest of his regalia in the wash.

This is the first time in my experience.

.. that I ever heard of a Senator trying to discredit his own Government before the world.... Your telegram is not only not true and an insolent approach to a situation that should have been worked out between man and man - but it shows conclusively that you are not even fit to have a hand in the operation of the Government of the United States.