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Humor is a social lubricant that helps us get over some of the bad spots.
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Ours is a government of checks and balances.
The Mafia and crooked businessmen make out checks, and the politicians and other compromised officials improve their bank balances.
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If the Old Testament were a reliable guide in the matter of capital punishment, half the people in the United States would have to be killed tomorrow.
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In a rational society we would want our presidents to be teachers.
In our actual society we insist they be cheerleaders.
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If there is a God, the phrase that must disgust him is - holy war.
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Asthma doesn't seem to bother me any more unless I'm around cigars or dogs.
The thing that would bother me most would be a dog smoking a cigar.
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Totalitarianism is patriotism institutionalized.
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The hair is real - it's the head that's a fake.