It's hardware that makes a machine fast. It's software that makes a fast machine slow.

— Craig Reucassel

The most unexpected Craig Reucassel quotes that are glad to read

Silence is a statement that is open to gross misinterpretation.

82

If the shoe fits, it is probably worn out.

52

The only thing that is obscene is censorship.

52

The Thought Police: To censor and protect.

18

Geez, all that money we waste on space exploration; just think how many bombs that would buy!

14

Don't trust anyone who has been in school for the past 24 consecutive years.

12

It's funny how most activists are pacifists.

8

When anarchy is declared, the first thing we do, let's kill all the anarchists.

7

Nothing surpasses the beauty and elegance of a bad idea.

4

Liberalism is financed by the dividends from Conservatism.

4

When shooting in the dark, it is a good idea to use a machine gun.

4

The entire universe is working against me.

I can't believe the entire universe could be that foolish!

4

About Craig Reucassel

Quotes 36 sayings
Profession Comedian
Birthday December 31, 1976

It's funny how social activists usually protest against the only things that have a credible chance of achieving the activists' goals.

3

It's a bit odd that nobody seems to be using the correct technical term to describe organized Islamic terrorists. They are not a faction of a religion or a social movement. They are a cult. A suicide cult.

3

Never underestimate the power of a simple tool.

3

The exchange rate between first-world lives and third-world lives in disaster stories in the media is about 50:1.

3

I wonder if those people shown protesting the deployment of nuclear weapons to western Europe during the Reagan era are feeling appropriately stupid today. 'Please don't take away our precious Soviet Union! - We demand the annihilation of all life on Earth!'

3

Fighting a war on terrorism is like fighting against crime.

We can never hope to eradicate crime, so we shouldn't bother fighting it.

3

Organizations like the ACLU fought and won the good fight back in the 1960's, but it's clear that nowadays they've run out of useful things to do since they now spend most of their time defending the scum of the Earth from getting what they rightly deserve.

3

Don't judge a book by its thickness either.

0

New studies show that 100% of all smokers die.

0

Whoever invented double clicking should be shot in the head! Twice!

0

You usually have to wait for that which is worth waiting for.

0

Power interrupts. Uninterruptible power interrupts absolutely.

0

I think; therefore, I am the center of the universe.

0

If I gave a damn what other people think of me, I would be more like other people.

0

Now is the time for all good men to run like hell.

0

Why are people unemployed? Because there is no work.

Why is there no work? Because people are not buying products and services. Why are people not buying products and services? Because they have no money. Why do people have no money? Because they are unemployed.

0

Think Tank, noun: The shower.

0

Supermarket automatic doors open for me; therefore, I am.

0

Even IBM can't stand in the way of progress... for more than a decade.

0

1 + 1 = 2. Everything else is derived.

0

In order for a man to be truly evil, he must be a woman.

0

The difference between being able to understand something and inventing it in the first place... is called genius.

0

Anything on paper is obsolete!

0
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