quote by Henny Youngman

Someone stole all my credit cards, but I won't be reporting it. The thief spends less than my wife did

— Henny Youngman

Almighty Credit Card quotations

Credit card quote We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand ~Randy Pausch

We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand ~Randy Pausch

24

Debt is so ingrained into our culture that most Americans can't even envision a car without a payment ... a house without a mortgage ... a student without a loan ... and credit without a card. We've been sold debt with such repetition and with such fervor that most folks can't conceive of what it would be like to have NO payments.

Procrastination is like a credit card: it's a lot of fun until you get the bill.

Credit card quote There is no limit to what a man can achieve if he doesn't care who gets the cred

There is no limit to what a man can achieve if he doesn't care who gets the credit.

16

A check or credit card, a Gucci bag strap, anything of value will do. Give as you live.

As in the case of California, the wolf is at the door of America and the present administration acts as if it's a pussycat. America cannot maintain the present entitlement programs and support a government this size and keep on living on a credit card.

L'Oreal's slogan 'because you're worth it' has come to epitomise banal narcissism of early 21st century capitalism; easy indulgence and effortless self-love all available at a flick of the credit card.

Credit card quote Make the most of today!

Make the most of today!

Typically, people who exercise start eating better and becoming more productive at work. They smoke less and show more patience with colleagues and family. They use their credit cards less frequently and say they feel less stressed. It's not completely clear why. But for many people, exercise is a keystone habit that triggers widespread change.

I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife.

If the US Government was a family—they would be making $58,000 a year, spending $75,000 a year, & are $327,000 in credit card debt. They are currently proposing BIG spending cuts to reduce their spending to $72,000 a year. These are the actual proportions of the federal budget & debt, reduced to a level that we can understand.

I know a baseball star who wouldn't report the theft of his wife's credit cards because the thief spends less than she does.

Most people don't grow up. Most people age. They find parking spaces, honor their credit cards, get married, have children, and call that maturity. What that is, is aging.

I really like Iceland. One of the nicest things about it is that I hardly ever had to reach for my credit card. There's practically nothing there to go shopping for.

Someone stole my wallet last week. The guy called me up and he was mad at me. He was like 'you gotta get your finances together. You got no cash, your credit cards are maxed out. You don't even have minutes on your calling card. I had to use my card to call you.'

Knives are like credit cards; don't leave home without 'em and always carry several

What Wall Street and credit card companies are doing is really not much different from what gangsters and loan sharks do who make predatory loans. While the bankers wear three-piece suits and don't break the knee caps of those who can't pay back, they still are destroying people's lives.

We hear a lot about identity theft when someone takes your wallet and pretends to be you and uses your credit cards. But the more serious identity theft is to get swallowed up in other people's definition of you.

High bankruptcy rates, increased credit card debt, and identity theft make it imperative that all of us take an active role in providing financial and economic education during all stages of one's life.

Without encryption, you and I wouldn't be able to do our banking online.

We wouldn't be able to buy things online, because your credit cards - they've probably been ripped off anyway, but they would be ripped off left and right every day if there wasn't encryption.

Modern man drives a mortgaged car over a bond-financed highway on credit-card gas.

Quite often I can be in a bookshop, standing beneath a great big picture of myself and paying for a book with a credit card clearly marked John Grisham, yet no one recognises me. I often say I'm a famous author in a country where no one reads.

If you don't have the money management skills yet, using a debit card will ensure you don't overspend and rack up debt on a credit card.

A man with a credit card is in hock to his own image of himself.

This is my ultimate fantasy: watching QVC with a credit card while making love and eating at the same time.

Social security, bank account, and credit card numbers aren't just data.

In the wrong hands they can wipe out someone's life savings, wreck their credit and cause financial ruin.

Many mornings I check out the news as soon as I wake up, because if it turns out that the world is coming to an end that day, I am going to eat the frosting off an entire carrot cake; just for a start. Then I will move onto vats of clam dip, pots of crime brûlée, nachos, M & M's etc. Then I will max out both my credit cards.

I don't like credit cards. They make overspending very easy. They can make life a lot more complex and stressful.

Ebay was involved and gave up 150 million passwords.

Target was attacked and gave up 40 million credit card numbers. Attacks like these are happening on a regular basis, both in the United States and around the world and the costs in terms of privacy or security in our financial sector are truly extraordinary.

You can always make a film somehow. You can beg, borrow, steal the equipment, use credit cards, use your friends' goodwill, wheedle your way into this or that situation. The real problem is, how do you get people to see it once it is made?

Don't cut up your credit cards, the problem is not the cards, it's the lack of financial literacy of the person holding the cards and always make the best out of a bad situation

How much smaller the large places are once we're grown up, when we have car keys and credit cards.

Perhaps you are thinking: 'But a tank costs several million dollars, not including floor mats. I don't have that kind of money.' Don't be silly. You're a consumer, right? You have credit cards, right? Perhaps you are thinking: 'Yes, but how am I going to pay the credit-card company?' Don't be silly. You have a tank, right?

Today, people are having to spend so much of their money, to acquire a house and to get an education that they don't have enough to spend on goods and services, except by running into yet more debt on their credit cards and other borrowings.

Using encryption on the Internet is the equivalent of arranging an armored car to deliver credit card information from someone living in a cardboard box to someone living on a park bench.

Face the fact that there's only one sure-fire way to erase credit card debt.

By picking up a big, shiny pair of scissors and cutting your wife in half.

When I was coming up through the ranks, not that many people carried a lot money of money on them. This was before checks and credit cards.

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