A kiss is a secret told to the mouth instead of the ear; kisses are the messengers of love and tenderness. — Ingrid Bergman
The kiss originated when the first male reptile licked the first female reptile, implying in a subtle way that she was as succulent as the small reptile he had for dinner the night before. — F. Scott Fitzgerald
It is difficult for two long-nosed lovers to kiss. — African Proverbs
A kiss without a mustache is like an egg without salt. — Rose Wilder Lane
Being kissed by a man who didn't wax his moustache was-like eating an egg without salt. — Rudyard Kipling
Short Kissing Funny Quotes
Take your tongue out of my mouth, I'm kissing you good-bye. — Waylon Jennings
The only true language in the world is a kiss. — Alfred De Musset
A kiss makes the heart young again and wipes out the years. — Rupert Brooke
Kiss me, and you will see how important I am. — Sylvia Plath
Cinnamon bites and kisses simultaneously. — Vanna Bonta
A kiss is a lusty dollop of dessert to be served with desire and savored with passion. — Sayings
A kiss that is never tasted, is forever and ever wasted. — Billie Holiday
Always remember this: 'A kiss will never miss, and after many kisses a miss becomes a misses.' — John Lennon
A loving relationship is one in which the loved one is free to be himself -- to laugh with me, but never at me; to cry with me, but never because of me; to love life, to love himself, to love being loved. Such a relationship is based upon freedom and can never grow in a jealous heart — Leo Buscaglia
Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes, but when you look back everything is different.
Life is short, Break the Rules. Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably And never regret ANYTHING That makes you smile. — Mark Twain
Because there's nothing more beautiful than the way the ocean refuses to stop kissing the shoreline, no matter how many times it's sent away. — Sarah Kay
it's a smile, it's a kiss, it's a sip of wine ... it's summertime! — Kenny Chesney
I tried to be normal once. Worst to minutes of my life.
I was born when you kissed me. I died when you left me. I lived a few weeks while you loved me. — Humphrey Bogart
If I were to meet the slave-traders who kidnapped me and even those who tortured me, I would kneel and kiss their hands, for if that did not happen, I would not be a Christian and Religious today... The Lord has loved me so much: we must love everyone... we must be compassionate! — Josephine Bakhita
Wise girls kiss but never love,
Listen but never believe,
And leave befor they are left. — Marilyn Monroe
What I tell young couples that are getting married is: you're going to have quarrels, and on some things, you're just going to have to agree to disagree. And when you go to bed at night, kiss each other and tell each other that you love each other. Don't go to bed mad. Life is too short. Keep it simple. — Si Robertson
I have caught more ills from people sneezing over me and giving me virus infections than from kissing dogs. — Barbara Woodhouse
Give me a thousand kisses, then a hundred, then a thousand more. — Catullus
Purple Haze all in my brain, lately things don't seem the same. Actin' funny but I don't know why. 'Scuse me while I kiss the sky. — Jimi Hendrix
Then I did the simplest thing in the world. I leaned down... and kissed him. And the world cracked open. — Agnes De Mille
I do wanna get married. It just sounds great. You get to go grocery shopping together, rent videos, and the kissing and the hugging and the kissing and the hugging under the cozy covers. Mmmm! But sometimes I worry that I don't wanna get married as much as I want to get dipped in a vat of warm, rising bread dough. That might feel pretty good, too. — Maria Bamford
Kissing babies and hugging fat girls. — Dave Bautista
I wasn't kissing her, I was whispering in her mouth! — Leonard Marx
A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks; a woman loses hers after four kisses. — H. L. Mencken
He took the bride about the neck and kissed her lips with such a clamorous smack that at the parting all the church did echo. — William Shakespeare
Smoking is indispensable if one has nothing to kiss. — Sigmund Freud
A tie is like kissing your sister. — Duffy Daugherty
Is not a kiss the very autograph of love? — Henry Theophilus Finck
You know what's funny to me? You know what's really funny to me? The fact that you've been calling Lita the walking kiss of death, but tonight.. the walking KOD beat the walking STD. — Chris Jericho
Were kisses all the joys in bed,
One woman would another wed. — William Shakespeare
This (French-Kissing) is a really sexy thing to do, according to the French people, although you should bear in mind that they also like to eat snails. — Dave Barry
A kiss may ruin a human life — Oscar Wilde
In Manhattan, marriage is a trend. Couples kiss over their arugula and radicchio salads. They fondle each other's genitals while devouring their pasta puttanesca. By the time the tiramisu arrives, they've slid under the table. — Cynthia Heimel
She must have Egyptian blood. Every time I try to kiss her she says, "Tut, Tut!" — Henny Youngman
South Sea natives who have been exposed to American movies classify them into two types, 'kiss-kiss' and 'bang-bang. — Hortense Powdermaker
Hakeem couldn't kick your ass cause you were too close, kissing his! — Charles Barkley
I am a strong believer in kissing
being very intimate, and the minute you kiss, the floodgates
open for everything else. — Jennifer Lopez
Give me a kiss, and to that kiss a score:
Then to that twenty, add a hundred more. — Robert Herrick
A kiss is a rosy dot placed on the "i" in loving. — Edmond Rostand
Now I know why they tell you to put your head between your knees on crash landings. You think you're going to kiss your ass good-bye. — Terry Hanson
Not everyone is comfortable with the kissing ritual. My husband is one of them. Her refuses to press lips with anyone except his wife, mother, and dog. If someone wanted to give him mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, he would refuse until he had been formally introduced. — Erma Bombeck
My father tried to give me the sex talk once, and he chickened out. He walked into my room and went, 'Adam - uh, don't kiss guys.' — Adam Ferrara
You kissed me like that when I was a blushing bride ...? I wonder what I was blushing about? — Gracie Allen
There were rumors that flew about the two of us, which were complete poppycock. There was never any romance between Madonna and myself. I mean, we had a moment where we're kissing in that video [Material Girl], but she at the time was with Sean Penn, and I was married with two kids, so there was no funny business there. — Keith Carradine
Some of the funniest things are just situations in life that are funny. The way people interact. People describing their first kiss with someone, to me, is really funny. When someone goes into detail about each moment of that, I really find that enjoyable to listen to. — Nathan Fielder
A kiss is like a fight, with mouths. — Kristen Schaal
I gave my wife a kiss this morning. She jumped out of bed and did a lap of honour. — Frank Carson
Well, I hope before Glenn goes, he'll come up here so we can give him a big hug and a kiss, because that's the kind of guy he is. — Jerry Coleman
Kissing on screen is just, funny enough you're just acting so you're distracted by that more than anything. Or at least I am. I'm actually always coming away from those things going like, 'I wonder how I kissed just now.' Because I have no idea! I'm just thinking about what's happening. — Dylan O'Brien
I like kissing people because it's funny. — Casey Abrams
Time has a funny way of collapsing when you go back to a place you once loved. You find yourself thinking, I was kissed in that building, I climbed up that tree. — Ann Patchett
When I met Johnny, I was pure virgin. He changed that. He was my first everything. My first real kiss. My first real boyfriend. My first fiancé. The first guy I had sex with. So he'll always be in my heart. Forever. Kind of funny that word. — Winona Ryder
What's it like kissing Taylor Lautner. — Robert Pattinson
She has been kissed as often as a police-court Bible, and by much the same class of people. — Robertson Davies
When you play spin the bottle, if they don't want to kiss you they have to give you a quarter. Well, hell, by the time I was twelve years old I owned my own home. — Phyllis Diller
It’s funny how the good things are all tied up with the bad. Sometimes it’s hard to tell which is which. But either way, you end up taking your sugar with your salt and your kicks with your kisses. — Kami Garcia
In Conclusion
Which quotation resonated with you best? Did you enjoy our collection of kissing funny quotes? Or may be you have a slogan about kissing funny to suggest. Let us know using our contact form.
Citation
Feel free to cite and use any of the quotes in this collection of kissing funny quotations. For popular citation styles(APA, Chicago, MLA), please use this citation page.
