40+ Yakov Smirnoff Quotes On War, A Box And Russia

Yakov Smirnoff is a Russian-American stand-up comedian, actor and writer. He is best known for his comedy routines during the 1980s, where he often made jokes about the Cold War and the differences between the United States and the Soviet Union. He is currently a professor of theater at Missouri State University in Springfield, Missouri. Following is our collection on famous quotes by Yakov Smirnoff on love, war, life.

Top 10 Yakov Smirnoff Quotes

1. In Russia we only had two TV channels. Channel One was propaganda. Channel Two consisted of a KGB officer telling you: Turn back at once to Channel One.
2. Everybody laughs the same in every language because laughter is a universal connection.
3. In every country, they make fun of city. In U.S. you make fun of Cleveland. In Russia, we make fun of Cleveland.
4. In America, you break law. In Soviet Russia, law breaks you! In America, you watch Big Brother. In Soviet Russia, Big Brother watch you!
5. In America, you can always find a party. In Soviet Russia, The Party can always find you!
6. It's kind of bittersweet. The human spirit is not measured by the size of the act, but by the size of the heart.
7. I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of doing - like showering.
8. Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list.
9. I believe there is a direct correlation between love and laughter.
10. The ad in the paper said 'Big Sale. Last Week.' Why advertise? I already missed it. They're just rubbing it in.

Yakov Smirnoff Short Quotes

• Never having alone time is real tough on people.
• When the needs of one person are being met by the other, there is laughter.
• If you have something important to say, Broadway and New York are great places to say it.
• I came to America to make it my home, and I did.
• Comedians are always hitting the topical notes that are on everybody's minds.
• Americans think Soviets are so grim. I want them to see that they can smile.
• Russian men have a saying: "Women are like buses..." That's it.
• Men and women are immigrants in each other's worlds.
• I believe that laughter is a language of God and that we can all live happily ever laughter.
• I fed my ego, but not my soul.

Yakov Smirnoff Quotes About Love

If love is the treasure, laughter is the key. — Yakov Smirnoff

I believe that love and laughter can only happen when one person takes the time to think about what would cause the other person to feel good. — Yakov Smirnoff

Falling in love is a chemical reaction. But it wears off in a year. — Yakov Smirnoff

My father described this tall lady who stands in the middle of the New York harbor, holding high a torch to welcome people seeking freedom in America. I instantly fell in love. — Yakov Smirnoff

Yakov Smirnoff Quotes About Russia

In America, you assassinate president. In Soviet Russia, president assassinate you! — Yakov Smirnoff

Many people are surprised to hear that we have comedians in Russia, but they are there. They are dead, but they are there. — Yakov Smirnoff

In America, your job determines your marks. In Soviet Russia, Marx determine your job! — Yakov Smirnoff

In Soviet Russia, party always finds you! — Yakov Smirnoff

In Russia, if a male athelete loses he becomes a female athelete. — Yakov Smirnoff

I was a comedian in Russia, and I worked on the cruise ships there. I met a lot of Americans, and they were laughing even though I didn't speak their language. — Yakov Smirnoff

In America, you drive car. In Soviet Russia, car drive you! — Yakov Smirnoff

Yakov Smirnoff Famous Quotes And Sayings

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. — Yakov Smirnoff

We may have forgotten how to feel. Nobody is teaching us how to live happily ever after, as we've heard in fairy tales. — Yakov Smirnoff

Balance is so important in our lives. In our busy world, we can give ourselves balance between thinking and feeling. — Yakov Smirnoff

I was not only typecast as a Russian, but I was typecast as Yakov Smirnoff. This is understandable, and I was very happy to get the roles, but it would be nice to be in a movie where I could be someone else. — Yakov Smirnoff

I found out that when you get married the man becomes the head of the house. And the woman becomes the neck, and she turns the head any way she wants to. — Yakov Smirnoff

In today's society we sometimes forget to balance our hearts and our heads; this is the reason we stop laughing. — Yakov Smirnoff

After the Soviet Union collapsed, people thought I wasn't funny anymore. — Yakov Smirnoff

A Russian Reversal quote on Uncyclopedia's Soviet Union article? How original. — Yakov Smirnoff

We have been learning since we were children how to make money, buy things, build things. The whole education system is set up to teach us how to think, not to feel. — Yakov Smirnoff

Life Lessons by Yakov Smirnoff

1. Yakov Smirnoff's work teaches us that humor can be a powerful tool to bridge cultural divides and bring people together.
2. He also demonstrates that humor can be used to confront difficult topics in a way that is both approachable and thought-provoking.
3. Finally, his work reminds us that laughter can be a great way to reduce stress and gain perspective on life's challenges.