Mother says there are locked rooms inside all women, kitchen of love, bedroom of grief, bathroom of apathy. Sometimes, the men, they come with keys, and sometimes the men, they come with hammers.

— Warsan Shire

Simplistic funny bathroom quotes that are about printable bathroom

My roommate says, "I'm going to take a shower and shave.

Does anyone need to use the bathroom?" It's like some weird quiz where he reveals the answer first.

The main part of the house is a deep red and I have butterscotch carpet.

And I have a bathroom with leopard skin floor, wallpaper and toilet.

Beer is not a good cocktail-party drink, especially in a home where you don't know where the bathroom is.

Spain travel tip: If bathroom genders are indicated by flamingos, the boy flamingo is the one with a hat. I learned this the hard way.

I don't want to abolish government. I simply want to reduce it to the size where I can drag it into the bathroom and drown it in the bathtub.

I wouldn't want to be someone's roommate, that's for sure.

You can't do certain things, you can't leave the bathroom door open...you can't put your feet on the couch, you can't hide stuff in the couch.

I tell ya, I knew my morning wasn't going right.

When I put on my shirt the button fell off, when I picked up my briefcase, the handle fell off, I tell ya, I was afraid to go to the bathroom.

in the mornin' po-lice at my door Fresh adidas squeak across the bathroom floor Out the back window.. I make a escape Don't even get a chance to grab my old school tape

The motion picture made in Hollywood, if it is to create art at all, must do so within such strangling limitations of subject and treatment that it is a blind wonder it ever achieves any distinction beyond the purely mechanical slickness of a glass and chromium bathroom.

People never sing...except in the bathroom. Birthing women also make their natural sounds next to running bath water. There is something about the power of water. People are drawn to water, spas, and sacred streams. Women in labor are drawn to water, too.

Homeschooling will certainly produce some socially awkward adults, but the odds are good they would have been just as quirky had they spent twelve years raising their hand for permission to go to the bathroom.

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom.

The paperless society is about as plausible as the paperless bathroom.

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end.

Sometimes the beauty is easy. Sometimes you don't have to try at all. Sometimes you can hear the wind blow in a handshake. Sometimes there's poetry written right on the bathroom wall.

When I was six years old I sprinkled sugar on my head, convinced myself it was pixie dust, wished myself invisible, and walked into the boys' bathroom at school.

I wanna get rich enough in life that I can afford to release a dozen doves every time I walk into a room. You know people would be like, 'Did you see that guy come out of the bathroom? The one with doves, it was beautiful.'

The woman in labor must have NO STRESS placed upon her.

She must be free to move about, walk, rock, go to the bathroom by herself, lie on her side or back, squat or kneel, or anything she finds comfortable, without fear of being scolded or embarrassed. Nor is there any need for her to be either "quiet" or "good."

I get really nervous if pigeons are flying around before shows.

I can't stand them after one once flew in through my bathroom window and went for me while I was having a wee. That was enough. I think pigeons target me.

How about we get rid of separate bathrooms for boys and girls? Gays and straights share the bathroom with zero issues. We need to put an end to the sexist pooping policies of yesterday. The only way to achieve gender equality is to start crapping in front of each other.

To ward off a feeling of failure, she joked that she could wallpaper her bathroom with rejection slips, which she chose not to see as messages to stop, but rather as tickets to the game.

You can't go to the bathroom alone... you might not come back. Cause no girl's ever been to the bathroom alone and survived. It's true. The last woman that attempted it, it was 1937 and her name was Amelia Earhart.

It is easier for me to take ten good pictures in an airplane bathroom than in the gardens at Versailles.

I think more and more people want to live alone.

You can be a couple without being in each other's pockets. I don't see why you have to share the same bathroom.

You have a different relationship to your own personal material than you do to other people's. When you go to the bathroom, you're not horrified and shocked. But if you walked in and found someone one else had just been, you probably would be. Your own relationship to these things is slightly different.

Bathroom bill - A bathroom bill is the common name for legislation or a statute that defines access to public toilets by gender (restrooms)—or transgender individual.

Modern Bathroom - Modern Bathroom is a California-based manufacturer and retailer of bathroom fixtures and furniture, specializing in modern and traditional bathroom vanities

Mirror in the Bathroom - "Mirror in the Bathroom" is a single by British ska band The Beat released as a single in 1980 from their debut album I Just Can't Stop It. It reached

Bathroom sex - Bathroom sex refers to engaging in sexual activities in the bathroom or toilet, either private or public. Bathroom sex occurs in many parts of the world

Bathroom cabinet - A bathroom cabinet (or medicine cabinet) is a cabinet in a bathroom, most often used to store hygiene products, toiletries, and medications. They are

Bathroom Wall - "Bathroom Wall" is a song taken from Faster Pussycat's first album Faster Pussycat released in 1987. Like much of the band's material from the album, it

Bathroom reading - Bathroom reading is the act of reading text while in a bathroom, usually while sitting on the toilet and defecating. The practice has been common throughout

Black comedy - Black comedy, also known as black humor, dark comedy, dark humor or gallows humor, is a style of comedy that makes light of subject matter that is generally

Nicole Maines - regarding gender identity and bathroom use in schools. Maines, who is transgender, was barred from using the female bathroom after a complaint; however,

You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight.

I moved into the garage at my mom's house, she wouldn't let me into the house, and the garage didn't have any running water. It did have electricity though, but it didn't have any running water, no bathroom. But, you know, it was great for me because I had my books there.

My honeymoon night was spent on the floor in the bathroom with my mother.

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.

In the 1998 Oscars, I found myself in the bathroom in a stall, next to Tom Selleck. So I leaned over and I said ‘looks like we’re a couple of peeing Toms.’ His angry silence is something I’ll never forget.

My bathroom is filled with hair and makeup stuff and I play with it all the time. What the real lesson is, is that you can own your own sense of beauty. It doesn't have to be something you get from somewhere else.

The umpire... is like the geyser in the bathroom; we cannot do without it, yet we notice it only when it is out of order.

Sisters annoy, interfere, criticize. Indulge in monumental sulks, in huffs, in snide remarks. Borrow. Break. Monopolize the bathroom. Are always underfoot. But if catastrophe should strike, sisters are there. Defending you against all comers.

Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance.