Looking for a cricket quote for inspiration? Or, maybe a cricket quote to make you laugh? Check out this collection of the best cricket quotations. — John Arlott
Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. — Tiger Woods
I'm not a big sports fan, but I love it when they "slam dunk." That's sexy. — Emma Bunton
Golf is the most fun you can have with out taking your clothes off. — Chi Chi Rodriguez
Professional sports are something they can't control. — Troy Vincent
I think any man over 250 pounds rollerblading is instant hilarity. There's nothing funnier than a giant, grown man rollerblading. — Chris Pratt
Short Funniest Sports Quotes
The best football is always about expression of emotion. Always. — Jurgen Klopp
Football: A sport that bears the same relation to education that bullfighting does to agriculture. — Elbert Hubbard
The other sports are just sports. Baseball is a love. — Bryant Gumbel
A rabid sports fan is one that boos a TV set — Jimmy Cannon
Sports are my passion and I really enjoy connecting with others who share my love of the game — Tessa Bonhomme
I'm an athlete, I'm funny, I'm creative, I can tell a story, I'm likable. — Logan Paul
The most famous athletes throughout the history of time are fighters. — Dana White
Humor is mankind's greatest blessing. — Mark Twain
Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious. — Peter Ustinov
Funniest Sports Image Quotes
The real workout starts when you want to stop.
Hilarious Sports Quotes
I don't think there's anybody in this organization not focused on the 49ers...I mean Chargers. — Bill Belichick
My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine. — Caroline Rhea
That's great, tell him he's Pele and get him back on. — John Lambie
When you're rich, you don't write checks. Straight cash, homey. — Randy Moss
When you get that nice celebration coming into the dugout and you're getting your ass hammered by guys, there's no better feeling than to have that done. — Matt Stairs
The only thing that keeps this organization from being recognized as one of the finest in baseball is wins and losses at the major league level. — Chuck LaMar
Your body will be around a lot longer than that expensive handbag. Invest in yourself.
I spent 90% of my money on women and drink. The rest I wasted — George Best
I led the league in go get 'em next time. — Bob Uecker
I feel like I'm the best, but you're not going to get me to say that. — Jerry Rice
My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt. — Chuck Nevitt
Funny Golf Quotes
I look into eyes, shake their hand, pat their back, and wish them luck, but I am thinking, I am going to bury you. — Seve Ballesteros
Luck is predictable; the harder you work, the luckier you get. — Brian Tracy
My swing is so bad I look like a caveman killing his lunch. — Lee Trevino
Our bodies are capable of anything. It's our mind we have to convince.
It takes hundreds of good golf shots to gain confidence, but only one bad one to lose it. — Jack Nicklaus
You swing your best when you have the fewest things to think about. — Bobby Jones
I never learned anything from a match that I won. — Bobby Jones
Every strike brings me closer to the next home run.
The older I get, the better I used to be. — Lee Trevino
I'd like to see the fairways more narrow. Then everybody would have to play from the rough, not just me. — Seve Ballesteros
The most important shot in golf is the next one. — Ben Hogan
I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced. — Lee Trevino
I think Bigfoot is blurry, that's the problem. It's not the photographer's fault. Bigfoot is blurry, and that's extra scary to me. There's a large, out-of-focus monster roaming the countryside. Run, he's fuzzy, get out of here. — Mitch Hedberg
Make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do. The body will always give up. — George S. Patton
Champions aren't made in gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them - a desire, a vision, a dream.
Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime. — Red Skelton
My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. — Milton Berle
I know I'm more on television, and I'm more recognizable than maybe even the players because they run and train, but I just stand there, and my face does all these funny things that everyone can see all the time. — Jurgen Klopp
If youre not failing once in a while, it probably means youre not stretching yourself.
Soccer is a game for 22 people that run around, play the ball, and one referee who makes a slew of mistakes, and in the end Germany always wins. — Gary Lineker
I called my wife up on the cell phone and said baby you aint gonna believe this, i go, we just hit a deer with the airplane. and there was a silence on the other end of the line followed by.. OH MY GOD.! were you on the ground? I said nope, santa was makin one last run. — Bill Engvall
I have two speeds. Fast and faster. I don't just run. I take it. — Arjen Robben
There's no happy ending to cocaine. You either die, you go to jail, or else you run out. — Sam Kinison
You can sum up this sport in two words: You never know. — Lou Duva
Most football players are temperamental. That's 90 percent temper and 10 percent mental. — Doug Plank
They say that nobody is perfect. Then they tell you practice makes perfect. I wish they'd make up their minds. — Winston Churchill
It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you place the blame. — Oscar Wilde
Statistics are like bikinis-they show a lot but not everything. — Lou Piniella
But the real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet. — Steve Spurrier
What's the difference between a three-week-old puppy and a sportswriter? In six weeks, the puppy stops whining. — Mike Ditka
The Mets just had their first .500-or-better April since July of 1992. — Ralph Kiner
Ninety percent of this game is half mental. — Yogi Berra
You guys line up alphabetically by height. — Bill Peterson
Chemistry is a class you take in high school or college, where you figure out two plus two is 10, or something. — Dennis Rodman
The Germans only have one player under 22, and he's 23! — Kevin Keegan
I've never seen anyone go on the DL with pulled fat. — Rod Beck
Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject. — Shelby Metcalf
Left hand, right hand, it doesn't matter. I'm amphibious. — Charles Shackleford
The Bible never says anything about dinosaurs. You can't say there were dinosaurs when you never saw them. Somebody actually saw Adam and Eve. No one ever saw a Tyrannosaurus Rex. — Carl Everett
If the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn't, it's that girls should stick to girls sports, such as hot oil wrestling, foxy boxing, and such and such. — Dan Castellaneta
I was thinking about making a comeback, until I pulled a muscle vacuuming. — Johnny Bench
The drivers have one foot on the brake, one on the clutch and one on the throttle. — Bob Varsha
You don't like to see hookers going down on players like that. — Murray Mexted
I can play in the center, on the right and occasionally on the left side. — David Beckham
Yeah, I'm cocky and I am arrogant. But that doesn't mean I'm not a nice person. — Jeremy Roenick
A day without newspapers is like walking around without your pants on. — Jerry Coleman
[My] career was sputtering until [I] did a 360 and got headed in the right direction. — Tracy McGrady
Well, Rickey's not one of them, so that's 49 percent right there. — Rickey Henderson
To win, I'd run over Joe's mom too. — Matt Millen
He has turned defensive boxing into a poetic art. Trouble is, nobody ever knocked anybody out with a poem. — Eddie Shaw
The only way to stop Jim Brown was to give him a movie contract. — Carl "Spider" Lockhart
I don't want to shoot my mouth in my foot, but those are games we can win. — Sherman Douglas
We're not attempting to circumcise rules. — Bill Cowher
In Conclusion
Which quotation resonated with you best? Did you enjoy our collection of funniest sports quotes? Or may be you have a slogan about funniest sports to suggest. Let us know using our contact form.
Citation
Feel free to cite and use any of the quotes in this collection of funniest sports quotations. For popular citation styles(APA, Chicago, MLA), please use this citation page.