A lollipop is a cross between hard candy and garbage. — Mitch Hedberg
A lot of people like lollipops. I don't like lollipops. To me, a lollipop is hard candy plus garbage. I don't need a handle. Just give me the candy. — Demetri Martin
Caramels are only a fad. Chocolate is a permanent thing. — Milton S. Hershey
Straight from the heart, I represent hip hop
I be three albums deep, but I don't wanna go pop
Too many candy rappers seem to be at the top
Too much candy is no good, so now I'm closing the shop. — Phife Dawg
pretty please, with a cherry on top of me! — Gena Showalter
Happiness. Simple as a glass of chocolate or tortuous as the heart. Bitter. Sweet. Alive. — Joanne Harris
It's changed throughout the years, but at one time I was a really big bubble gum ice cream fan. I'd spit the bubble gum pieces in a cup and then collect them. — Timothy Olyphant
There’s nothing as cozy as a piece of candy and a book. — Betty MacDonald
Candy Quotes
The water was glassy and calm, still candy-colored in the afterglow of sunset. — Stephen King
I tell my students, 'When you get these jobs that you have been so brilliantly trained for, just remember that your real job is that if you are free, you need to free somebody else. If you have some power, then your job is to empower somebody else. This is not just a grab-bag candy game. — Toni Morrison
All the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911. — Lewis Black
How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.
I want to get a vending machine, with fun sized candy bars, and the glass in front is a magnifying glass. You'll be mad, but it will be too late. — Mitch Hedberg
My father was in the civil service. I can remember standing in a bus shelter in the pouring rain, and that we were allowed candy floss at the end of the holiday if we had behaved. — Honor Blackman
Truth-tellers are not always palatable. There is a preference for candy bars. — Gwendolyn Brooks
Work hard in silence, let your success be the noise
I was handing out $10,000 on Halloween and one kid tried to trade the $10k for candy. — MrBeast
The holy land was supposed to be spotless, a serious equivalent of Disneyland in which not a single candy wrapper is to stay on the ground for more than a few minutes. — Marvin Olasky
I just feel such a connection to the little kids in Naples. I remember being on the street wanting a small piece of candy. — Giuliana Rancic
I like vending machines, because snacks are better when they fall. If I buy a candy bar at the store, oftentimes I will drop it so that is achieves its maximum flavor potential. — Mitch Hedberg
Candy Bar Quotes
Instead of dispensing soft drinks and candy bars, the vending machines at MIT sell slide rules. — Ronald McNair
If you put a Mars bar in one of Glenn Hughes’ hands and a bass in the other, he’ll choose the Mars bar. — Gary Moore
You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar. — George Carlin
Work until you no longer have to introduce yourself.
Whoever thought a tiny candy bar should be called fun size was a moron. — Glenn Beck
If I played in New York, they'd name a candy bar after me. — Reggie Jackson
I like crazy, childlike, candy bar-filled cakes with gooey caramel, chocolate-covered nuts, marshmallows, and the like. — Ron Ben-Israel
You must tell yourself "No matter how hard it is, or how hard it gets, I'm going to make it".
The Kit Kat candy bar has the name Kit Kat imprinted into the chocolate. That robs you of chocolate! That's a clever chocolate-saving technique. — Mitch Hedberg
October, baptize me with leaves! Swaddle me in corduroy and nurse me with split pea soup. October, tuck tiny candy bars in my pockets and carve my smile into a thousand pumpkins. O autumn! O teakettle! O grace! — Rainbow Rowell
I was just a kid. I think I stole a candy bar. I remember feeling so terrible. It was the worst shock. I was probably 7. That's my least favorite feeling: guilt. — Amy Sedaris
I get the Reese's candy bar. You look at that, there's an apostrophe-s there. That means the candy bar is his. I didn't know that. Next time you're eating a Reese's candy bar, and a guy named Reese comes by and says, "Gimme that", you better hand it over. — Mitch Hedberg
Halloween Candy Quotes
Halloween was confusing. All my life my parents said, "Never take candy from strangers." And then they dressed me up and said, "Go beg for it." I didn't know what to do. I'd knock on people's doors and go, "Trick or treat." — Rita Rudner
A candy coloured clown they call the sandman
Tiptoes into my room every night
Just to sprinkle stardust and whisper;
"Go to sleep, everything is alright" — Roy Orbison
In the midst of all the candy and commercialism, let's not lose sight of the true meaning of Halloween: tree worship and animal sacrifice. — Dana Gould
Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.
This Halloween, the most popular mask is the Arnold Schwarzenegger mask. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you will sound just like him. — Conan O'Brien
Halloween revolves around delicious candy, excessive alcohol, and horny women dressed as sluts. This also describes my vision of Heaven. — Tucker Max
My favorite Halloween candy is the candy corn. It comes in four colors: white, yellow, orange, brown. Those are also the stages of your teeth rotting after you eat it. — Jay Leno
Work hard in silence. Let your succes be the noise.
Halloween is tomorrow. A group of wine experts has actually come up with a list of the best wines to pair with Halloween candy. They say, "White wine goes great with Skittles, red wine goes great with Twix, and ... we're alcoholics, aren't we? — Jimmy Fallon
According to USA Today, 74 percent of Americans plan to hand out candy this Halloween. Although President Obama thinks it should be just the top 1 percent. — Jay Leno
In recent years, there have been reports of people with twisted minds putting razor blades and poison in taffy apples and Halloween candy. It is no longer safe to let your child eat treats that come from strangers. — Ann Landers
And all Halloween candy pales next to candy corn, if only because candy corn used to appear, like the Great Pumpkin, solely on Halloween. — Rosecrans Baldwin
Because we have so much eye candy and mind candy, spending so much time trying to pay the rent, all of this conspires to keep us from thinking too hard or taking action from that. Our time is stolen. So much of our daily life is stolen. — Lydia Lunch
I like it when you reach into a vending machine to grab your candy bar, and that flap goes up to block you from reaching up? That's a good invention. Before that, it was hard times for the vending machine owners. "Yeah, what candy bar are you getting?" "That one, and every one on the bottom row!" — Mitch Hedberg
I have a hard time defending the production of candy, given that it is basically crack for children and makes them dependent in unwholesome ways. — Steve Almond
Me and Mr. Brainwash in Toronto signing his mural at Hard Candy Fitness Opening! #artforfreedom — Madonna Ciccone
After a snowstorm is the best time to be in the woods, because all the empty beer and soda cans and candy wrappers disappear, and you don't have to try as hard to be in another time. Plus there's just something beautiful about walking on snow that nobody else has walked on. — Carol Rifka Brunt
Knowledge was like candy: you never turned it down, especially if you didn't have to work too hard to get it. — Robert Liparulo
You can choose who you want to be the hero [in Hard Candy], but youll be second-guessing yourself -- theres just no right answer. Our society is obsessed with finding good and finding evil, but I think were all capable of anything. — Ellen Page
It would be a horrible business, a horrible sort of culture if you didn't have the candy pop as well as the real hard-hitting stuff. And I love some pop music. — Thea Gilmore
I see the relationship sincerity/humor differently. Instead of seeing a balance between them, I see them more inextricably linked, as if one is the hard candy shell that gives to the other, or one is the apparition, the ghost-image that invokes the other. — Alex Lemon
I have to confess I can't have the holiday season without "Hard Candy Christmas". For some reason, it makes me think of the sticky ribbon candy bowl my mid-western grandma always had. — Hank Stuever
I love all the soft candy. I'm not a big fan of the hard candy though. — Anthony Dirrell
I like soft candy. I'm not a fan of the hard stuff. I like that quick flavor boost! — Andre Dirrell
Tax reform has been used as a crutch, as a smokescreen and as candy coating for the hard choices that have to be made. — Sir Arthur Sullivan
People give you a hard time about being a kid at twelve. They didn't want to give you Halloween candy anymore. They said things like, “If this were the Middle Ages, you'd be married and you'd own a farm with about a million chickens on it.” They were trying to kick you out of childhood. Once you were gone, there was no going back, so you had to hold on as long as you could. — Heather O'Neill
I would love to pretend I don't diet, but I work very hard. I stay active and eat very healthy. Anybody who says otherwise is either unhealthy or lying! I will admit that I'm addicted to sugar - licorice, Jujubees and jelly candies. And I actually love bran muffins! — Evangeline Lilly
I like to work out. I work out hard when I get to it, but it's so sporadic, I'm not sure it counts at all! I eat pretty much anything, but I eat high-quality food. There was never a packet of chips or box of candy in my house when I was growing up. Ever. — Rachael Taylor
Mister, I don't want no trouble. I just came downtown here to get some hard rock candy for my kids, some gingham for my wife. I don't even know what gingham is, but she goes through about ten rolls a week of that stuff. I ain't looking for no trouble, Mister. — Bill Hicks
McDonald's is over with. But chips and candy and stuff, it's going to be hard to get away from that. — Derrick Rose
And this must be Avery?" "Oh, God, no," Cam said. "This is Candy, Mom." His mother's eyes widened and a bit of color infused her cheeks. "Uh, I'm..." "I'm Avery," I said, shooting Cam a look. "You had it right." She spun around, smacking Cam across the arm. Hard, too. "Cameron! Oh my God. I thought..." She smacked him again and he laughed. "You're terrible. — J. Lynn
In Conclusion
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