You can change your wife, your politics, your religion, but never, never can you change your favourite football team.
— Eric Cantona
Useful Funny Football quotations
Messi scores a goal and celebrates. Cristiano scores a goal and poses like he's in a shampoo commercial.
If you're in the penalty area and don't know what to do with the ball, put it in the net and we'll discuss the options later.
Sure, luck means a lot in football. Not having a good quarterback is bad luck.
In my time at Anfield we always said we had the best two teams on Merseyside - Liverpool and Liverpool reserves.
Some people tell me that we professional players are soccer slaves.
Well, if this is slavery, give me a life sentence.
Pele called me the greatest footballer in the world. That is the ultimate salute to my life.
Yes, I thought I was joining Manchester United, I was misled by all involved.
I wasnt aware of another Manchester team
The goal is to win. It's not about making money. I have many much less risky ways of making money than this (buying Chelsea football club). I don't want to throw my money away, but it's really about having fun and that means success and trophies.
I have two speeds. Fast and faster. I don't just run. I take it.
If I ever wear a Chelsea shirt, you have permission to kill me.
I blew the lot on vodka and tonic, gambling and fags.
Looking back, I think I overdid it on the tonic.
We didn't underestimate them. They were just a lot better than we thought.
Football is not a game but a religion, a metaphysical island of fundamental truth in a highly verbalized, disguised society, a throwback of 30,000 generations of anthropological time.
Well, when you're playing good football, it's good football and if you don't have good football, then you're not really playing good football.
That's great, tell him he's Pele and get him back on.
Rapport? You mean like, You'll run as fast as you can, and I'll throw it as far as I can?
When it's third and ten, you can take the milk drinkers and I'll take the whiskey drinkers every time.
We must have had 99 per cent of the match. It was the other three per cent that cost us.
Being an England supporter is like being the over-optimistic parents of the fat kid on sports day.
Maybe a good rule in life is never become too important to do your own laundry.
Winning doesn't really matter as long as you win
They're the second best team in the world, and there's no higher praise than that.
Men are clinging to football on a level we aren't even aware of.
For centuries, we ruled everything, and now, in the last ten minutes, there are all these incursions by women. It's our Alamo.
I always used to put my right boot on first, and then obviously my right sock.
Never go for a 50-50 ball unless you're 80-20 sure of winning it.
If you're mad at your kid, you can either raise him to be a nose tackle or send him out to play on the freeway. It's about the same.
I can see the carrot at the end of the tunnel.
I'm as happy as I can be-but I have been happier.
American football makes rugby look like a Tupperware party.
I look at the NBA as a football game without the helmet.
I don't know whether I prefer Astroturf to grass. I never smoked Astroturf.
A football team is like a piano. You need eight men to carry it and three who can play the damn thing.
Most football players are temperamental. That's 90 percent temper and 10 percent mental.
