You know it's time to do the laundry when you dry off with a sneaker. — Zach Galifianakis
Maybe a good rule in life is never become too important to do your own laundry. — Barry Sanders
Marriage is about the most expensive way for the average man to get laundry done. — Burt Reynolds
We all know that crap is king, give us dirty laundry. — Don Henley
Raising children, be aware that the piles and piles of laundry will disappear all too soon and that you will, to your surprise, miss them profoundly. — Thomas S. Monson
My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint. — Erma Bombeck
I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes -- and six months later you have to start all over again. — Joan Rivers
My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance. — Erma Bombeck
You can't get spoiled if you do your own ironing. — Meryl Streep
There isn't a child who hasn't gone out into the brave new world who eventually doesn't return to the old homestead carrying a bundle of dirty clothes. — Art Buchwald
Few tasks are more like the torture of Sisyphus than housework, with its endless repetition: the clean becomes soiled, the soiled is made clean, over and over, day after day. — Simone de Beauvoir
In department stores, so much kitchen equipment is bought indiscriminately by people who just come in for men's underwear. — Julia Child
[Kagura is doing laundry and tries to wring out Kyou's shirt, causing it to rip in two]
Kyo Sohma: Tell me what I think just happened didn't just happen!
Kagura: My love!
Kyo Sohma: My shirt! — Natsuki Takaya
Short Laundry Quotes
Feminism is an entire world view or gestalt, not just a laundry list of women's issues. — Charlotte Bunch
It taught me how to make a bed, how to do laundry, how to wake up early, how to manage my finances. — James David Vance
Better to have loved and lost than to live with regret. — Big Pun
Airing the family's laundry can make people upset. — James David Vance
We are both queens, so who will hang out the laundry? — Indian Proverbs
Give me a laundry list and I'll set it to music. — Gioachino Rossini
Why do you have to break up with her? Be a man. Just stop calling. — Matt LeBlanc
We are coming down from our pedestal and up from the laundry room. — Bella Abzug
It's better to have loved and lost than to have to do forty pounds of laundry a week. — Laurence J. Peter
Dirty Laundry Quotes
Great teams do not hold back with one another. They are unafraid to air their dirty laundry. They admit their mistakes, their weaknesses, and their concerns without fear of reprisal. — Patrick Lencioni
I think it was one of the better meetings that I've had with those guys, because I was honestly able to say everything I wanted to say, and I pretty much aired out the dirty laundry. So from that point on, I thought all of that was behind us. — Latrell Sprewell
[Donald] Trump is taking America's dirty laundry to the center stage. Everything he does, the rest of the country already does really well: victimize immigrants, poor people, women. — Junot Diaz
The secret of the creative life is how to feel at ease with your own embarrassment. We're all in the dirty laundry business and we're being paid to take risks and look silly. Race car drivers get paid to risk their lives in a more concrete way; we get paid to risk our lives in an emotional way. — Paul Schrader
I'm good at doing the laundry. At least that. And it's a religious experience...Water, earth, fire-polarities of wet and dry, hot and cold, dirty and clean. The great cycles-round and round-beginning and end-Alpha and Omega, amen. — Robert Fulghum
Humanity is the washerwoman of society that wrings out its dirty laundry in tears. — Karl Kraus
We got the bubble headed bleached blonde comes on at five, She can tell you 'bout the plane crash with a gleam in her eye, It's interesting when people die give us dirty laundry... — Don Henley
I'm very parasitic, from my own experiences. I just go and mine my dirty laundry, you know, and go through it until I find something that's interesting enough to me to write a song about. — Nikki Jean
The laundry has its hands on my dirty shirts, sheets, towels and tablecloths, and who knows what tales they tell. — Joseph Smith, Jr.
I'm kind of ashamed to be a celebrity. I don't understand wanting to read about other people's dirty laundry. I think celebrity is the biggest red herring society has ever pulled on itself. — Jude Law
Laundry Detergent Quotes
Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem.Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash. — Jerry Seinfeld
Have you ever noticed how they keep improving your laundry detergent, but they still can't get those blue flakes out? Why do we trust them to get our clothes clean? These guys can't even get the DETERGENT white! — Jerry Seinfeld
It is totally unconscionable to subject defenseless animals to mutilation and death, just so a company can be the first to market a new shade of nail polish or a new, improved laundry detergent. It's cruel, it's brutal, it's inhumane, and most people don't want it. — Abigail Van Buren
I see TV ads about detergents that can get blood stains out of your cloths. I say if you have blood stains on your cloths you should be thinking about something other than laundry. — Jerry Seinfeld
I don't even have children, it's just been an excuse to play jenga and hit softballs in my backyard with a box of laundry detergant wearing baby clothes. — Thom Yorke
I was ten. I had noticed something was weird earlier in the day, but I knew from commercials that one's menstrual period was a blue liquid that you poured like laundry detergent onto maxi pads to test their absorbency. This wasn't blue, so... I ignored it for a few hours. — Tina Fey
Hey G-Town Gal: turn your underwear inside out! Then u only have to do laundry every 2 weeks—saves on detergent & trips to Laundromat! — Patricia Heaton
I really do think that our subconscious gets corrupted with fear, and fear is how news media - all media - makes us [watch] long enough to get to the Tide commercial. That's all it's about. Generating fear so that we can buy the proper laundry detergent. — Ann Patchett
I am really concerned about all of the chemicals. Global warming is another huge one, but the amount of chemicals being used in like laundry detergents and fertilizers is concerning. — Mason Jennings
Postal inspectors have been given advanced warning that Publishers Clearinghouse is sending packets of laundry detergent that could be mistaken for anthrax. Oh, good timing. What genius came up with this promotion? What's next - a ticking alarm clock? Let's put that in a box. — Jay Leno
Laundromat Quotes
The first time I met Patti Smith was in a laundromat. We knew some of the same people, including Richard Hell. — Tom Verlaine
If you will die for me, I will die for you and our graves will be like two lovers washing their clothes together in a laundromat If you will bring the soap I will bring the bleach. — Richard Brautigan
I want to keep going as I have, to travel, read, perform, write, and enjoy my family. I've promised myself only this: no more Laundromats, no more two-shows-a-night, and no more deadlines. I'll work at my own pace. — Jimmy Buffett
I'm blacker than Barack Obama. I shined shoes. I grew up in a five-room apartment. My father had a little laundromat in a black community not far from where we lived. I saw it all growing up. — Rod Blagojevich
If you can dress as a stormtrooper and go to a laundromat, or wear a sexy cheese gown in public, you might start to find "normal" social interactions a little less daunting. — Misha Collins
I have detected disturbances in the wash.'
'The wash?'
'The space-time wash.'
'Are we talking about some sort of Vogon laundromat, or what are we talking about?'
'Eddies in the space-time continuum.'
'Ah...is he. Is he.'
'What?'
'Er, who is Eddy, then, exactly? — Douglas Adams
History is the heavy traffic that prevents us from crossing the road. We're not especially interested in what it consists of. We wait, more or less patiently, for it to pause, so that we can get to the liquor store or the laundromat or the burger bar. — Mal Peet
I took my courage in both hands and went to the Laundromat to do my washing. I had to use three machines. — Julie Doucet
America has been very open to immigrants in terms of laws, getting loans - it has been helping immigrants more than it's been helping African Americans in starting a small business. That's key, whether you're starting a restaurant or a laundromat. — Marcus Samuelsson
Washing Machine Quotes
Being unique is what's cool. Normal? What's normal? A setting on a washing machine. No one wants to be that. — Sayings
Normal is a cycle on a washing machine. — Emmylou Harris
Everyone wants a piece of land. It's the only sure investment. It can never depreciate like a car or a washing machine. Land will double its value in ten years. In less than that. Land is going up every day. — Sam Shepard
Indeed, everything was a shock at the beginning. The wash machines, dryers, dishwashers, garbage disposal machines, juicers, toasters, and yes, the ATM machines. Watching money spilled out of a wall was simply amazing! — Li Cunxin
Go to the bookstore and look at how many bookshelves are filled with books trying to explain how to work the devices. We don't see shelves of books on how to use television sets, telephones, refrigerators or washing machines. Why should we for computer-based applications? — Donald A. Norman
My mom always said normal is just a cycle on the washing machine. — Wynonna Judd
The freedom of women was achieved by two things: One, the Pill. Two... by labour-saving devices like the washing machine. By science, not feminism. — Doris Lessing
I like to do things for my wife on Valentine's Day. I open the door for her when she puts laundry in the washing machine. — Milton Berle
Unshed tears leave a deposit on your heart. Eventually they form a crust around it and paralyze it, the way mineral deposits paralyze a washing machine. — Susanna Tamaro
We are at the 1908 Hurley washing machine stage with the Internet. — Jeff Bezos
Dry Cleaning Quotes
I talk slicker than a pimp from Augusta who just had his linen suit dry-cleaned — Drake
An Indian's dress of deer skins, which is wet a hundred times upon his back, dries soft; and his lodge also, which stands in the rains, and even through the severity of winter, is taken down as soft and as clean as when it was first put up. — George Catlin
I do a lot of dry shampoo. My hair just works better when it's not as clean! — Jessica Szohr
Western doctors are like poor plumbers. They treat a splashing tub by cleaning up the water. These plumbers are extremely apt at drying up the water, constantly inventing new, expensive, and refined methods of drying up water. Somebody should teach them how to close the tap. — Denis Parsons Burkitt
A hearty laugh gives one a dry cleaning, while a good cry is a wet wash. — Puzant Kevork Thomajan
I like the dry-cleaners. I like the sense of refreshment and renewal. I like the way dirty old torn clothes are dumped, to be returned clean and wholesome in their slippery transparent cases. Better than confesssion any day. Here there is a true sense of rebirth, redemption, salvation. — Fay Weldon
There is nothing more energizing than inhaling the tang of wilderness, loamy after rain, pungent with the richness of earth shuddering with life, or taking in the brisk dry cleanness of winter. — Lawrence Anthony
He's getting dumped. And he doesn't even know it yet. He's probably eating a cheeseburger or flossing or picking up his dry cleaning, and he has no idea. No inkling. — Sarah Dessen
Don't spend two dollars to dry clean a shirt. Donate it to the Salvation Army instead. They'll clean it and put it on a hanger. Next morning buy it back for seventy-five cents. — Billiam Coronel
Clean Clothes Quotes
I love to be clean. I wear the same things, all of my clothes pretty much look the same. I'm a plain and simple type of guy. I don't really do a lotta busy colors and things of that nature. I feel like less is more. — Kevin Gates
Behind my carefully buttoned collar is my nakedness, the struggle to find clean clothes, food, meaning, and money. Behind sex is rage, behind anger is love, behind this moment is silence, years of silence. — Dorothy Allison
He himself will go into the drain and take his boy in his own lap. He will clean his dress, clean his clothes, clean his body; and afterward he will say, "My boy, you should walk carefully." — Prabhat Ranjan Sarkar
Have you ever taken anything out of the clothes basket because it had become, relatively, the cleaner thing? — Katharine Whitehorn
All a woman needs is a good bath, clean clothes, and for her hair to be combed. These things she can do herself. I very seldom go to the hairdresser, but when I do, I just marvel. — Hedy Lamarr
Krishna insisted on outer cleanliness and inner cleansing. Clean clothes and clean minds are an ideal combination. — Sathya Sai Baba
Let not the dirt of the sanskaras of your thoughts and deeds touch you, by surrendering every thought and act at the feet of your Guru. As a laundryman washes and cleans clothes, in the same way, I remove all the dirt which has stuck to you through your thoughts and actions. — Meher Baba
I'm horrible to live with. I don't clean. My clothes end up wherever I take them off. I forget to flush the toilet. — Megan Fox
In my hand luggage I always have my camera, iPod, make-up bag, tooth brush, cleansing products, clean underwear, socks and a change of clothes in case anything goes missing at the other end - and of course my passport. — Lisa Snowdon
Forgotten? No, we never do forget:
We let the years go: eash then clean with tears,
Leave them to bleach, out in the open day,
Or lock them careful by, like dead friends’ clothes,
Till we shall dare unfold them without pain,—
But we forget not, never can forget. — Dinah
Dirty Clothes Quotes
Just wearing all black comes from Johnny Cash. I'm on the road so much that if I wear all black my clothes never get dirty. You can't tell if I've worn the same shirt twice. — G-Eazy
With your votes you are working for your future. It is not a holiday; it is the most serious day of work since you were born. Better to come in clothing dirty from work than with your soul filthy from having sold your right to justice. — Luis Munoz Marin
She was wearing the same clothes, but now she looked haggard and dirty. The delicate illusions that get us through life can only stand so much strain. — Hunter S. Thompson
The poor are always ragged and dirty, in very picturesque clothes, and on their poor shoes lies the earth of the Lacustrine period. And yet what a privilege it is to be even a beggar in Rome! — M. E. W. Sherwood
I don't really care if my clothes are wrinkled or there's a stain on my shirt. Going out on the road, your clothes are dirty. — Avril Lavigne
I'd say I'm pretty messy. NOT dirty though - there's a difference. Messy people leave clothes on their bedroom floor... dirty people leave pizza boxes. — Nikki Ferrell
You don't want to take the world over with a whole hamper full of dirty clothes. That's the main thing people overlook. And take a shower, take a bath every day. — J. B. Smoove
You have no idea how humiliating it was, as a boy, to suddenly have all your clothes, your toys, snatched by the bailiff. I mean we were a middle-class family, it's not as if it was happening up and down the street. It made me ashamed, I felt dirty. — John Le Carre
She remembered how she had felt cleaning out her father's clothes, wanting at once to hold on to every dirty handkerchief and musty page of sheet much, and yet wishing she were anywhere else on earth, free of it all. — J. Courtney Sullivan
Dry Cleaners Quotes
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed? — Steven Wright
A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe. — Rita Rudner
You can get stuff done in New York that you can't in Los Angeles. If you wanted to get some milk and get your shoes repaired and drop something off at the dry cleaner, that's an all-day adventure in Los Angeles. In New York, you can bang that out in half an hour. — Justin Theroux
Citizen's Band radio renders one accessible to a wide variety of people from all walks of life. It should not be forgotten that all walks of life include conceptual artists, dry cleaners, and living poets. — Fran Lebowitz
The wacky thing about those bad guys is that you can't count on them to be obvious. They forget to wax their mustaches and goatees, leave their horns at home, send their black hats to the dry cleaner's. They're funny like that. — Jim Butcher
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed. — Virginia Ostman
I try and keep busy with something, but I also give myself permission to be busy with something that is creative and rewarding, not just the errands to the dry cleaner. — Eric Lange
Housework hassles go on, are never resolved, and will probably extend into the afterlife ('Why am I the one who takes the clouds to the dry cleaners?'). — Marni Jackson
I can't even go to the dry cleaner by myself anymore. You're seen in public with anybody that you might not even know, and you're speculated about. — Jessica Biel
If somebody writes a review of a dry cleaner, that piece of content is not wildly viral. It's not like a viral video that can spread across the world in a matter of minutes, so as a result, each market is almost an island unto itself. — Jeremy Stoppelman
Gaea?” Leo shook his head. “Isn’t that Mother Nature? She’s supposed to have, like, flowers in her hair and birds singing around her and dear and rabbits doing her laundry.” “Leo, that’s Snow White,” Piper said. — Rick Riordan
Before you go to bed, write down three 'gratefuls' for the day and three 'did wells' (they can even include something as simple as doing the laundry)-the results can be amazing! — Carol Burnett
I only wanted Uncle Vernon standing by his own car (a Hudson) on a clear day, I got him and the car. Ialso got a bit of Aunt Mary’s laundry and Beau Jack, the dog, peeing on the fence, and a row of potted tuberous begonias on the porch and 78 trees and a million pebbles in the driveway and more. It’s a generous medium, photography. — Lee Friedlander
Live your life. Do the dishes. Do the laundry. Take your kids to kindergarten. Raise your children and your grandchildren. Take care of the community in which you live. Make all of that your path, and follow your path with heart. — Dipa Ma
The lives of most men are patchwork quilts. Or at best one matching outfit with a closet and laundry bag full of incongruous accumulations. A lifetime of training for just ten seconds. — Jesse Owens
We should all do what, in the long run, gives us joy, even if it is only picking grapes or sorting the laundry. — E. B. White
By the age of six the average child will have completed the basic American education.... From television, the child will have learned how to pick a lock, commit a fairly elaborate bank holdup, prevent wetness all day long, get the laundry twice as white, and kill people with a variety of sophisticated armaments. — John F. Kennedy
Hearing the Beastie Boys speak out against sexism made me feel like if these men who had once sung about getting girls to 'do the laundry' and 'clean up my room' could understand, maybe the rest of the world would follow suit. It made me hopeful in the best way. — Jessica Valenti
Few of these scientists set out to study breathing. But, somehow, in some way, breathing kept finding them. They discovered that our capacity to breathe has changed through the long processes of human evolution, and that the way we breathe has gotten markedly worse since the dawn of the Industrial Age. They discovered that 90 percent of us—very likely me, you, and almost everyone you know—is breathing incorrectly and that this failure is either causing or aggravating a laundry list of chronic diseases. — James Nestor
I treat myself like I would my daughter. I brusher her hair, was her laundry, tuck her in goodnight. Most importantly, I feed her. I do not punish her. I do not berate her, leave tears staining her face. I do not leave her alone. I know she deserves more. I know I deserve more. — K.Michelle
There is nothing but a lack of social vision to prevent us from paying an adequate wage to every American citizen whether he be a hospital worker, laundry worker, maid or day laborer — Martin Luther King, Jr.
The Italian landscape has always harmonized the vulgar and the Vitruvian: the contorni around the duomo, the portiere'S laundry across the padrone's portone, Supercortemaggiore against the Romanesque apse. Naked children have never played in our fountains, and I. M. Pei will never be happy on Route 66. — Robert Venturi
Sometimes I'd like to stuff all Jews (myself included) into the drawer of a laundry basket. then open it to see if they've suffocated — Franz Kafka
What would we say if the Chinese sent a gunboat with their marines up the Mississippi River claiming they were protecting their laundries in Memphis? — Will Rogers
Surely these women won't lose any more of their beauty and charm by putting a ballot in a ballot box once a year than they are likely to lose standing in foundries or laundries all year round. There is no harder contest than the contest for bread, let me tell you that. — Rose Schneiderman
The secret to finding your passion is to bring it to everything you do. --Marie Forleo (Yes, even doing the laundry!) — Marie Forleo
The reality is that we do not wash our own laundry - it just gets dirtier. — Frank Serpico
No other job in the world could possibly dispossess one so completely as this job of teaching. You could stand all day in a laundry, for instance, still in possession of your mind. But this teaching utterly obliterates you. It cuts right into your being: essentially, it takes over your spirit. It drags it out from where it would hide. — Sylvia Ashton-Warner
Valentine's Day is a time to celebrate the joy of being in love. Unless you're single & lonely then it's called Laundry Day. — Dane Cook
After enlightenment, the laundry. — Buddha
In nineteen minutes, you can mow the front lawn; color your hair; watch a third of a hockey game. In nineteen minutes, you can bake scones or get a tooth filled by a dentist; you can fold laundry for a family of five. In nineteen minutes, you can stop the world; or you can just jump off it. — Jodi Picoult
Some guys smoke. Some guys drink. Some guys chase women. I'm a big barbecue-sauce guy. ... I'm like that guy on the Odd Couple, and it's not the neat guy. I go into my room and find pieces of pizza under the laundry. — Rick Majerus
I made a dollar a day sweeping a laundry out. Then we made a record that was number two in Los Angeles. We got so excited hearing it on the radio that Carl threw up. — Dennis Wilson
In Conclusion
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