quote by Garry Shandling

When I'm not in a relationship, I shave one leg. That way, when I sleep, it feels like I'm with a woman.

— Garry Shandling

Satisfaction Shaving quotations

My roommate says, "I'm going to take a shower and shave.

Does anyone need to use the bathroom?" It's like some weird quiz where he reveals the answer first.

Looking in the mirror to check if my tie is straight is a waste of my time.

I only look in the mirror once a day, and that's in the morning when I shave.

Do you know what breakfast cereal is made of? It's made of all those little curly wooden shavings you find in pencil sharpeners!

I did a film a long time ago with a shaved head and I had the ugliest looking head in the world.

Like a barber's chair that fits all buttocks.

Although a lot of pain for a little screen time;

Shaving legs, waxing eyebrows, high heels, trying to put on a bra, losing weight because women's clothes are SO revealing - Ladies you have my respect.

I've always wanted to shave my head for a role because I've wanted to play a character who had a shaved head. I don't know what the fascination is.

I shaved my head about 15 years ago and the first time I shaved it, I started running my hand through my hair and it was very therapeutic.

Slicing a warm slab of bacon is a lot like giving a ferret a shave.

No matter how careful you are, somebody's going to get hurt.

A good lather is half the shave.

As an actor it's always easier to shave or cut your hair for a role, but it's hard to put fake hair on or grow hair for a role.

When do we put on the lingerie? Always at the beginning of the relationship - first couple of months, strutting around the bedroom wearing a teddy. Yeah, six months later, you've stopped shaving your legs and you look like a teddy.

The useless days will add up to something.

The shitty waitressing jobs. The hours writing in your journal. The long meandering walks. The hours reading poetry and story collections and novels and dead people’s diaries and wondering about sex and God and whether you should shave under your arms or not. These things are your becoming.

The system shaves the dice on the side of those with money and power, and anyone who believes otherwise deserves anything that happens to him.

I shaved a lot off of a lot that I saw in that I like to be less is more and make everything count and not give anyone anything extra. I was what you see is what you got. It was organic. I came up with the persona. The persona is me, coupled together with a lot of my interests.

My favourite food at the moment is Pasta, “with tons of shaved Parmesan on the side. Not crumbly but like the hunks, you know what I meanwhen you get the thin slices.

No barber shaves so close but another finds worke.

I'm not shaving for a month so you all can see my mustache... I'm pumped!

Shave off your beard and wear a dress. You would be a great female impersonator.

When you go into your customary barber shop, you will wait for the man who gives you a little better shave, a little trimmer hair-cut. Business leaders are looking for the same things in their offices that you look for in the barber shop.

Original sin is in us like our beard.

We are shaved today and look clean; tomorrow our beard has grown again, nor does it cease growing while we remain on earth. In like manner original sin cannot be extirpated from us; it springs up in us as long as we live.

Why is it I always get my best ideas while shaving?

I think you should, yeah. You should wash your beard, then shave it off, nail it to a Frisbee and fling it over a rainbow.

A barber lathers a man before he shaves him.

Fame is like a shaved pig with a greased tail, and it is only after it has slipped through the hands of some thousands, that some fellow, by mere chance, holds on to it!

Missy is really a man. She's a cross dresser. She hangs out with Sammartino. They shave each other's back.

If you teach a poor young man to shave himself, and keep his razor in order, you may contribute more to the happiness of his life than in giving him a thousand guineas.

When I went to the Olympics, I had every intention of shaving the moustache off, but I realized I was getting so many comments about it — and everybody was talking about it — that I decided to keep it.

I miss Saturday morning, rolling out of bed, not shaving, getting into my car with my girls, driving to the supermarket, squeezing the fruit, getting my car washed, taking walks.

I take my hat off to the ladies. The amount of grooming-plucking and shaving and all the other things men never have to do. I went down and spent time with transvestites in London in the clubs and all that. Got an insight to that world, and it's a mad world, but they are very warm and very open people. It was a great experience.

A mustache really defines your face. My dad had a mustache when I was growing up, and I can still remember when he shaved it, he looked like a completely different person.

First it's pretty tires. Next it's pretty guns. Then the next thing you know, you're shaving your beard and wearing capri pants.

The killing of everyone was the easy part, the most difficult part was lathering them up and shaving them, that's the part that freaked me out the most.

Having a beard is natural. When you think about it, shaving it off is quite weird.

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