80 Toddler Quotes
Following is our list of toddler quotations and slogans full of insightful wisdom and perspective about .
Famous Toddler Quotes
Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog twice their own weight and dump him into the bathtub. — Erma Bombeck
A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it. — Jerry Seinfeld
When kids hit one year old, it's like hanging out with a miniature drunk. You have to hold onto them. They bump into things. They laugh and cry. They urinate. They vomit. — Johnny Depp
Families survive the terrible twos because toddlers aren't strong enough to kill with their hands and aren't capable of using lethal weapons. — Paul Bloom
A three year old child is a being who gets almost as much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as it does out of finding a small green worm. — Bill Vaughan
If you have a 2 or 3 year old who is not talking, you must start an early intervention program. The worst thing you can do with an autistic 3 year old is to do nothing. — Temple Grandin
Little children, from the moment in which they are weaned, are making their way toward independence. — Maria Montessori
The toddler must say no in order to find out who she is. The adolescent says no to assert who she is not. — Louise J. Kaplan
We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up. — Phyllis Diller
The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old. — Jean Kerr
A grownup is a child with layers on. — Woody Harrelson
What a child can do today with assistance, she will be able to do by herself tomorrow. — Lev S. Vygotsky
The distinctive character of a child is to always live in the tangible present. — John Ruskin
A three-year old was examining his testicles while taking a bath. 'Mom,' he asked,'are these my brains?' 'Not yet.' she replied. — Allan Pease
Sometimes very small children in a proper environment develop a skill and exactness in their work that can only surprise us. — Maria Montessori
Short Toddler Quotes
- Structure is something that calms our nature; we know this of toddlers. — Krista Tippett
- What is a home without children? Quiet. — Henny Youngman
- Just because you can thrill a toddler by chewing with your mouth open doesn’t mean you should. — Michael Nesmith
- The toddler craves independence, but he fears desertion. — Dorothy Corkville Briggs
- Self-expression without craft is for toddlers. — Rosanne Cash
- The fundamental job of a toddler is to rule the universe. — Lawrence Kutner
- Toddlers are so powerful and so egocentric and teenagers are also so powerful, so egocentric. — Laura Huxley
- I have a four-month-old and I also have a toddler, so that takes up all of my time. — Eva Mendes
- I learned that buying expensive furniture with toddlers around is pointless. — Nicole Polizzi
- TLC should stand for Toddlers, Lunatics, and Cake. — Natasha Leggero
Todd Quotes
Todd Glass has amazing energy on stage. Dave Attell is one of my favorites because he's a one liner comic who is always incredibly in the moment with the audience. As for newer people, I think Adrienne Iapalucci writes some great, dark jokes and Sean Patton has a hilarious voice on stage. — Anthony Jeselnik
I love doing stuff with Todd Barry and Jon Benjamin. We give the stage to good bands and funny people. — David Cross
Had there not been a Mary Todd, there would not have been an Abraham Lincoln. She found him when he was a young lawyer and really a bumpkin. No one knew of him, but she recognized his brilliance. — Sayings
The killing of everyone was the easy part, the most difficult part was lathering them up and shaving them, that's the part that freaked me out the most. — Johnny Depp
Mitt Romney has asked Todd Akin to step down. That's too bad. Todd Akin was the guy to lead the Republican Party into the 16th century. — David Letterman
I do believe that you have to bring some degree of truth from yourself to the role [Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street ]in and I'll admit it here, I have shaved a grown man before. I have done it. And it wasn't Tim [Burton]. — Johnny Depp
Get involved in everything you've ever dreamed of doing. — Marion Jones
I discovered that Robert Todd Lincoln was there for each of the first three assassinations. I wanted to write about the Lincoln Memorial, so when I found out he had attended its dedication, that helped focus it further. — Sarah Vowell
There's a hole in the world Like a great black pit And the vermin of the world Inhabit it ... And it goes by the name of London. — Stephen Sondheim
I kind of did this thing in high school, a spoof of 'Sweeney Todd' called 'Shirley Todd,' and I had a great time doing that. — Chris Colfer
People Writing About Toddler
| Name | Quotes | Likes |
|---|---|---|
 Maria Montessori |
374 | 17541 |
 Erma Bombeck |
331 | 3736 |
 Jerry Seinfeld |
282 | 1528 |
 Johnny Depp |
281 | 3331 |
 Paul Bloom |
55 | 132 |
 Bill Vaughan |
452 | 1980 |
More Toddler Quotes
We still wading in the water... Cocaine, blunts, marinating in the water. Lean and took a puff, and then she gave it to my father, Used to take the bullets out so I could play with the revolver. Satan serenading ever since I was a toddler, Tell 'em talk is cheap...niggas living for the dollar. — Vince Staples
Comfort is everything. You start doing something and you want it to be perfect right away, but most babies are born ugly and then they shake it out and you get beautiful toddlers. — John Mulaney
America is a country that seems forever to be toddler or teenager, at those two stages of human development characterized by conflict between autonomy and security. — Anna Quindlen
Nobody believes that the man who says, 'Look, lady, you wanted equality,' to explain why he won't give up his seat to a pregnant woman carrying three grocery bags, a briefcase, and a toddler is seized with the symbolism of idealism. — Judith Martin
For human beings, simply put, the default state is happiness. If you don’t believe me, spend a little time with a human fresh from the factory, an infant or toddler. Obviously, there’s a lot of crying and fussing associated with the start-up phase of little humans, but the fact is, as long as their most basic needs are met — no immediate hunger, no immediate fear, no scary isolation, no physical pain or enduring sleeplessness — they live in the moment, perfectly happy. — Mo Gawdat
Tell me why it is that a toddler will gag over a perfectly wonderful breakfast of ham, eggs, biscuits, juice, and jelly. But then he will enthusiastically drink the dog's water and play in the toilet. Truly, he is his mother's greatest challenge...; and her most inexpressible joy. — James Dobson
I definitely look like a toddler. I feel comfortable and I have a lot of fun out there [John Mulaney Show]. And if I were to be extremely egotistical, I'd say I got a tiny bit better. — John Mulaney
A trajectory of misery – at this point – seems intentional. We have all the information we need to see clearly. We are no longer unaware toddlers on the landscape of consciousness. It is no longer cute to crap ourselves. — Buddy Wakefield
Toddlers are active explorers. They eagerly try new things and use materials in different ways. Toddlers want to be independent and they have a strong sense of ownership. — Janet Gonzalez-Mena
I never really did years of movie-after-movie-after-movie but when you've got three toddlers in the house you're performing all day long, anyway, with puppet shows and stories - I act around the clock. — Julia Roberts
There is no frigate like a book and no harbor like a library, where those who love books but can't afford their own complete collections, or those who need a computer, or kids who need a safe place to read after school, or moms with toddlers who want their babies to learn to read, can all come together and share in a great community resource. — Sara Paretsky
The false pride of perennial celebration, of wearing flag lapel pins while betraying the values that the flag stands for, is like the self-esteem curriculum for toddlers, where everything is praised and no achievement ultimately has meaning. — Anne-Marie Slaughter
The cell phone has become the adult's transitional object, replacing the toddler's teddy bear for comfort and a sense of belonging. — Margaret Heffernan
Even if you find yourself in a heated exchange with your toddler, it is better for your child to feel the heat rather than for himto feel you withdraw emotionally.... Active and emotional involvement between parent and child helps the child make the limits a part of himself. — Stanley Greenspan
The basic idea that incentives can be used to motivate behavior is a powerful one. It works for employees, and it has a clear place in parenting, as anyone who has tried to potty-train a recalcitrant toddler with sticker rewards knows. — Emily Oster
The stirrings of morality emerge early in childhood. Toddlers spontaneously offer toys and help to others and try to comfort people they see in distress. — Steven Pinker
My children are now adults and just kind of guide them while they allow you to have input in their lives without controlling them the way you did when they were toddlers. These are good steps to use for fathers at each step of their children's lives. — T. D. Jakes
A preschool child does not emerge from your toddler on a given date or birthday. He becomes a child when he ceases to be a wayward, confusing, unpredictable and often balky person-in-the- making, and becomes a comparatively cooperative, eager-and-easy-to-please real human being--at least 60 per cent of the time. — Penelope Leach
It was unbelievable seeing me as an action figure! In a few months, toddlers all around the country will be biting my head off! — Emma Watson
In a household of toddlers and pets, we discover this rule of thumb about happy families - that they are least two-thirds incontinent. — Robert Breault
For toddlers I suggest leaving their mittens on year-round, indoors and out. That way they can't get into aspirin bottles, liquor cabinets, or boxes of kitchen matches. — P. J. O'Rourke
We live in a time of instant everything, courtesy of the electronic highway. It creates a community of toddlers. When they don't get immediate gratification, they get petulant and sulky. — Faye Kellerman
In a houseful of toddlers and pets, you can start out having a bad day, but you keep getting detoured. — Robert Breault
No country in history ever sent mothers of toddlers off to fight enemy soldiers until the United States did this in the Iraq war. — Phyllis Schlafly
Grown-up people do very little and say a great deal.... Toddlers say very little and do a great deal.... With a toddler you cannot explain, you have to show. You cannot send, you have to take. You cannot control with words, you have to use your body. — Penelope Leach
And extracting one molecule's signature in spectral analysis from the rest of the signatures is hard work, sort of like picking out the sound of your toddler's voice in a roomful of screaming children during playtime. It's hard, but you can do it. — Neil deGrasse Tyson
The needs of babies and toddlers were constant and drained the life out my sense of self and my familys relationship with each other. — Mika Brzezinski
Moms are, in my opinion, the wonders of the universe. They can leap tall buildings in a single bound, they can go where no person has gone before, and they can somehow get toddlers to eat. The problem is that mothers are also some of the most stressed people on the planet. There's just so much to do and not enough of them. — Kevin Leman
Teenagers talk about the idea of having each other's 'full attention.' They grew up in a culture of distraction. They remember their parents were on cell phones when they were pushed on swings as toddlers. Now, their parents text at the dinner table and don't look up from their BlackBerry when they come for end-of-school day pickup. — Sherry Turkle
In less than a year, the Bush administration will strut out of office, leaving the country in roughly the same condition a toddler leaves a diaper. — Graydon Carter
Somewhere a woman is praying her toddler wins a beauty pageant. I say this because sometimes people wonder why God lets tornadoes happen. — Dana Gould
Your toddler will be "good" if he feels like doing what you happen to want him to do and does not happen to feel like doing anything you would dislike. With a little cleverness you can organize life as a whole, and issues in particular, so that you both want the same thing most of the time. — Penelope Leach
Toddlers ask many questions, and so do school children - until about grade three. By that time, many of them have learned an unfortunate fact, that in school, it can be more important for self-protection to hide one's ignorance about a subject than to learn more about it, regardless of one's curiosity. — Jan Hunt
My dad taught me swears when I was a toddler, and I saw, at a really early age, that if I shocked people, I would get approval, and it made my arms itch with glee. I got addicted to it. It became this source of power in a totally powerless life. — Roseanne Barr
Toddlers can make you feel as if you have violated some archaic law in their personal Koran and you should die, infidel. — Anne Lamott
Sometimes I think children are the worst people alive. And even if they're not- even if some smiling toddler is as pure as Evian- it's only a matter of time. — Chuck Klosterman
I definitely have a Luddite's approach to what's going on. I find that as I get older, I get stupider. For me, the iPhone is harder than reading Faust. I've been hanging out a bit with Lou Reed, and he's the complete opposite. He's into technology and is kind of like a toddler, compared to me, who's like an old 19th-century widow or something. — Rufus Wainwright
Once we begin to appreciate that the apparent destructiveness of the toddler in taking apart a flower or knocking down sand castles is in fact a constructive effort to understand unity, we are able to revise our view of the situation, moving from reprimand and prohibition to the intelligent channeling of his efforts and the fostering of discovery. — Polly Berrien Berends
In Conclusion
Which quotation resonated with you best? Did you enjoy our collection of toddler quotes? Or may be you have a slogan about toddler to suggest. Let us know using our contact form.
Citation
Feel free to cite and use any of the quotes in this collection of toddler quotations. For popular citation styles(APA, Chicago, MLA), please use this citation page.
Embed HTML Link
Copy and paste this HTML code in your webpage